welcome back to the show the short sharp
shock of a true presidency has sparked a
new American fitness craze walking
slowly while lifting a one-pound weight
most of us have no experience with
creative sustained protests so we sent
Amy Hager to get a few tips from some
folks who have been resisting oppressors
ever since the Roman Empire lost summer
my country voted to [ __ ] itself the UK
has been stood out from the European
Union luckily I'm a dual citizen so I
got on a plane and moved to America land
of the free and home of the Donald Trump
wins the presidency but we can't give up
yet because there is one place where
this [ __ ] did meet your storybook
ending and that place is Heartland once
one of ten years ago a beast from the
West came to Scotland and wandered into
the untouched jeans of a began sure
declaring it for himself we're building
the greatest golf course anywhere in the
world before he could grab them by the
peat bog the fella Donald's prospective
love to Scotland my mother was born and
thrown away I love the people I love the
stretch I'm Scotch myself it's Scottish
you plonker and with a false promise of
6,000 jobs Scottish government was
seduced and his course grew and grew I'm
an artist and this is probably the
greatest piece of canvas that anybody's
ever worked on it haha I haven't always
failed off it but there was led into the
man who lived next to the golf course
and refused to sell his land a farmer
who invented the art of pissing off
Trump and rocking a woolly jumper my
sister I never much okay in the beach'
come over the June [ __ ] about half a
dozen bodyguards and the first thing he
said was what's this what line was $25 a
[ __ ] in your [ __ ] dreams I said
nothing could make you sell your land
no I stress them out in ten seconds he
was an [ __ ]
the only regret I have is I didn't knock
him on his ass when I met him this
Joseph Anne she's so mad that he
lumbered in front of some TV cameras to
start whaling I look at this before
and his disgusting conditions mr. Forbes
Linz in a pig-like atmosphere to slum I
mean it's horrible the way he maintains
it did you feel really hot when he
called you a peg
I was actually laughing about it so with
my mother he thinks he's a clone I love
putting them off he's a compulsive liar
that's what he is you should keep
calling Malaya and his boat is about
their heart someday during the election
I was calling him a likes as part of
this secret Facebook group I don't think
it made a massive impact but while I
wasn't preaching to the choir
Michael painted it on the side of his
head this enraged the Beast even more
and he said the government to seize for
bisland but the farmers fight has
inspired the villages like our next hero
here's from threatening to seize Michael
Forbes land so I offered to purchase a
small part of it why would you
purchasing it stopped him from seizing
it at that time I was a researcher and
in Antarctica and so they wanted to talk
purchase it from me they'd have to come
and see me about it 9,000 miles away
fasted by a spirit cleaner shocked
Donald gave up and moved on to his next
fight when Scotland announced plans to
build turbines off the coast of his golf
course Trump charged into Parliament to
tell to the windmill they are so
unattractive so ugly so noisy and so
dangerous that if Scotland does this I
think Scotland will be in serious
trouble
where is the clinical evidence not an
opinion first of all I am the evidence
riding off that laughter our next hero
parliament member patrick harvie
took his stand i tweeted a picture from
the end of life O'Brien poking fun item
that I just added these little speech
bubble thing I'm the evidence I'm the
evidence Wow
nailed it how many retweets and
favorites it again I think it's had
quite a number since then that number is
52 yet somehow that was still enough to
anchor the bridge I was astonished to
receive a letter telling me Donald Trump
was accusing me of blasphemy and
complaining to the parliamentary
standards commissioner blasphemy is that
because he's legally God well Donald
Trump accused me essentially of
offending the whole of Christendom the
trolling only continued because when
Chopin lets out a parliament
into this raid night I found myself
outside the Scottish Parliament behind
him at one point and I had a balloon in
my hand and took a shot I balloons
Donald Trump I rub the balloon on his
head and his hairs are amazing they
react chemically similar to real hair
and exactly I don't have many tips for
the people of America but they find
themselves behind the Donald Trump with
a statically charged balloon take your
chance so that the whole country joins
in the fun they showed up to protest
brought some very subtle signs and has
made us started flying Mexican flags
this one made he was even arrested for
urinating on the course but in
retrospect he was probably into that yet
somehow chomp still thinks he's
Scotland's golden boy I have a great
relationship with the people of Scotland
most neighbors who love us I hit the pub
to hear what Thomas Scottish neighbors
really think I think daughter comes the
biggest blob-like in the world yet she's
a spoiled baby a wall apart masseuses
because of all that what to name just in
the holes in the testicle the fact that
you're justified so funny just by pets
president aline explained me easy
[ __ ] can escape I can that's right
that's very nice fun of the Institute on
Trump I was still so lost and also very
drunk sure the windmills are being built
his course is losing money and Michael
Forbes still has his land but back home
President Trump is Justin off what
advice to give to Americans
just keep pissing them off just keep him
busy by annoying him and then he can't
do all the stuff worried about an
[ __ ] always an [ __ ] keep pissing
them off and you'll crack up yeah
ideal end up there but itself Michael is
right you can't give up because she's
like she's pissing him off because
apparently anyone can do it a cranky old
farmer a man you barely have the Twitter
ginger Jesus or even to the door cuz
binoculars right [ __ ] off she's being a
dick she's gained 200 pots to call him a
dick I
then if all our files
she's showing your day total you can't
even keep me of his actual golf course
he may have taken our country our
freedom 20 years old mine right now
looks a little bit Wow
Scotland is me
[Applause]
[Music]
you