Kris Krohn here today with Limitless TV
And we are talking about the four-letter
word, love.
Right. Man, this word can be so complicated. It can be used for so much
good and it can also be used to wreak havoc and too many of us are using this
in a sabotaging way not against others but against ourselves.
So today we're going
to talk about, what do you do to feel the love.
How do you love yourself when you just don't know how?
You know I remember when
I was in elementary school I felt like I was picked on a lot. I mean my mom
dressed me I didn't really have much fashion awareness to say the least and
I'll never forget being in fifth grade and having Matt Minor who was boyfriend
the girl I liked write me a fake love letter.
And
all of a sudden he passed me
this letter, opened it up and I started reading it and as I read it it was from
this girl that I liked and as she was gushing on how she liked me and wanted
to hang out with me
until I looked over the crop of the letter and noticed that
Matt and his buddies and Ashley, the girl I liked are all laughing.
You know it's
amazing that they're these moments that we have in life where we guess whether
we are lovable and we guess whether we're worthy and we guess whether we're
worth it. And often a lot of our life experiences can easily point to this
idea that were not enough and that we're not lovable and that we're not special.
I think that was one of the things that I really grabbed onto in my childhood was
I really questioned my value and I would do that by saying I'm not special.
I'm nothing special. People don't love me. People don't want me. People don't want
to be around me.
Now if you got kids then you've heard this language before this
is where a lot of it comes from because you make these decisions early on a
childhood and guess how long they stay with you?
Yep, forever.
There's no point in adulthood when we pause naturally and say I've
reached a level of maturity I'm going to evaluate the thoughts of my childhood.
So the strange thing is you might not be feeling loved and you might be wondering
how and yet here's the really strange thing,
you're still harkening to ideas from probably elementary school or junior
high or childhood when for many of us most of us there was lots of love
available to us
but we get what we focus on.
And if we focus on not feeling loved
or if we've said that phrase and we repeat that phrase then we find
ourselves feeling unloved and it's incredibly dangerous. People will end
their lives over this incredibly dangerous thought. So the question is, how
do you love yourself?
You know there's this, there's this man that lived 2,000
years ago.
And he gave these two great commandments
that were supposed to replace an old law and he said the first,
love God with all
your heart.
And the second one
is to love everybody else like yourself.
Meaning
you're part of one of the two great Commandments if you come from a space of
Christendom. In fact, all religions where we universally really beautifully come
together is in this conversation of love.
And so love for self.
this is a
commandment. And if you're wondering how to do it, you might be a little bit out
of practice if you spend a lot of your life in a space of not loving yourself
and yet right here in this moment do you want to know what's going to change for
you?
It starts by giving yourself permission to love yourself.
In fact,
I want to invite you to write some things down right now and pause the video if
you have to to make sure that you get all of these thoughts verbatim.
Write these down.
I love myself.
I'm thankful for my life.
I'm special.
I matter.
I'm precious.
I'm priceless.
I'm enough.
I love being me.
I accept me.
Now if you've been
struggling with loving yourself then these are words that likely make you
want to retch a little bit because they feel so uncomfortable.
I know because every month of my, my three day limitless events we do these
incredible breakthroughs and I know my experience personally with others how
uncomfortable it can be.
And the reality is we have to start by putting our faith
and hope and dreams into what we want before we can even expect evidence.
Because evidence is always going to come after the trial of faith.
So I'm going to
invite you to take those statements that you wrote down and this is the first
advice that I want to give you.
I want you to recite the morning and night.
I want you to meditate on them.
And instead of repeating them until you believe them
do it the other way.
Choose by choice. You don't need a better reason than what I
just gave you.
Believe them, speak them
and feel them.
And you'll
start noticing your world changing dramatically because you only have the
ability to love others
to the extent that you can run yourself.
All the time I meet the mommies out there taking care of the babies
sacrificing sacrificing sacrifice for their children.
Putting nothing in them.
I want you to know something.
For those you out there that do this with friends
children or anyone else is that you might think you may have allowed
yourself to believe your own delusion that you're doing some great work by
serving and loving others and the reality is, it's just as hollow if you
can't feel it yourself.
The extent to which you love yourself is the extent to
which you can love others.
So if you really want to make a difference in the
world,
if you want to help other people,
if you want to uplift other people,
Then you need to start with you.
It's just like being on the plane and the oxygen
masks come down and they say don't put the oxygen mask on your kid put it first
on the person that if they pass out they won't be able to get it to the kid or be
able to revive or help the kid.
In other words, it's so important for you to
choose into feeling love because it alters the rest of our relationship with
you.
I'm going to invite you to hang out right now and do a little process with
me.
If you can and you're in a place where you can close your eyes and take a
deep breath in and get yourself grounded do so now.
Take your, close your eyes and
take a deep breath in through your nose
And let it out through your mouth
And take one more of those in through the nose but this time fill up all your lung
capacity
hold it for a second and exhale.
What's the first memory that comes up for you?when you have this thought that
you're not lovable?
And let something come up.
<ight be a memory from childhood
might be a memory from grade school might be a memory from home life. Maybe
it was a messy breakup.
In that moment that memory that's come up for you what
did you decide about yourself?
Every one of us makes decisions about ourselves
from the unfortunate experiences of life when circumstances don't go our way and
we get these memories and these memories become our guiding stars of how to do
life.
Only promise is that when we take a rotten memory, a negative memory and then
we take home the wrong message whatever message you got from it,
that's kind of
one of your rule book items sticking out there that's leading your life.
And I
want to ask you right now, is this idea ,this guiding this idea, is it, is it serving
you?
No it's not. That's why you're watching the video in the first place
it's what's the backup and evidence to this idea that you're not lovable that
you're not worthy of love that you shouldn't can't have love be loved
you're not special.
And now's the time to question that. Do you really want that
moment? do you really want that memory to be your guiding star for the rest of
your life?
It was probably so long ago do you
really want that, you know, do you really want to take advice from a five year old,
a 13 year old, or someone in a messy spot?
No. That's who you got running around and
between your ears on your board of directors whispering, you're not lovable
you're not lovable. Do you remember that one thing that happened?
Well
now you got it,
you got the memory. And now you're looking at it and I'm asking is it
serving you anymore?
If it's not,
it's time for a new choice.
And at this point
you can fill the blank with whatever you want but you might want to start with, I
am precious. I'm lovable. I love me. I show up for me. I accept myself.
And notice
that these beliefs, they're not about others accept me, others love me, everyone
likes me, I can't control other people. This is about your relationship with you
it's time to make good choices so that you can start showing up for you.
Because
I get it.
You and I?
We and the rest of this world?
We have experiences, all of them different
that weigh on us negatively because we take home
the wrong message.
Now you've got the right message and as you've written it
down I want to invite you to play with this and let this idea written on this
piece of paper and this memory in this moment of this video, let this be a new
guiding star for you because I've spoken truth about you because the truth is you
are precious. You are worthy of love and you can love yourself. So start putting
energy into this idea today as opposed to the old memory, old thought, old idea
that is not serving you anymore.
If you search for this video, this is one of the
most important things that you can be learning about. And have a special gift
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don't feel that priceless of energy and love. Then I'm going to pay for your
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