Hi everyone. I'm Jennifer from English with Jennifer. You know, I think we probably all
have a budget, so we're careful how we spend our money, but do you ever treat yourself to
something special? I do. Sometimes it's a chocolate bar or yet another box of tea,
but there are also times when I decide to go big and I buy something I really want,
like these boots. I certainly didn't need them, but I wanted them. If you bought
yourself something special within the past year, tell me in the comments. Then I'll feel better
about splurging. That's when you spend more than you normally do or more than you should
because you want to experience some kind of joy. I splurged on boots. I treated myself to new boots.
Let's talk about these phrases. I treated myself to new boots. I bought new boots
for myself. "Myself" is a reflexive pronoun. It refers back to the subject:
me. Reflexive pronouns show that the subject is doing something to or for oneself. Think about
the reflection you see in the mirror. You look at yourself in the mirror. I looked at myself in the
mirror and admired my new boots. Let's change the subject to "Jennifer." What other change do
we need to make? We need to use "herself." Jennifer looked at herself in the mirror.
Now, in this moment, what happened? I picked up the box and hurt myself. I hurt my back.
And what am I doing here? Do you see the scale?
I'm weighing myself. How often do you weigh yourself, by the way?
Do you remember all the reflexive pronouns? Let's go through them.
myself
yourself, yourselves
herself
himself
itself
ourselves
themselves
A generic pronoun can refer to a whole group or to anyone. Look how reflexive pronouns
can be used to make a generalization. It's good to treat yourself to something special
sometimes. "You" is impersonal here. It means anyone. It's good to treat ourselves
to something special sometimes. This is also general, but it includes you. It
is a healthy practice to treat oneself to something special occasionally. "Oneself"
is gender-neutral and singular. It sounds a bit more formal than the other alternatives.
What about "themself" as a reflexive pronoun? Not many grammar books include this form,
but it exists. I'd say at the present, it's mostly used in spoken English as a gender-neutral,
singular pronoun. Compare. People should treat themselves to something special sometimes.
Everyone should treat themselves to something special sometimes. I'd use either of these
variations, but I wouldn't use the second in formal English. Some writers and speakers would
use these variations: Everyone should treat themself to something special sometimes. A
happy person knows it's okay to treat themself to something special sometimes. "Themself" has
become a single-word alternative to using the phrase "herself or himself"
or "himself or herself." Please know that some dictionaries and sources consider the singular
reflexive pronoun "themself" non-standard, but will you hear it? Yes, you will.
We already talked about the most basic use of reflexive pronouns. It's when an action is done to
or for oneself, so reflexive pronouns refer back to a person mentioned already. He sees himself in
the mirror. "Himself" is a direct object. He's always looking at himself in the mirror. Now
"himself" is the object of a preposition. I often catch him looking at himself in the mirror. Again,
the reflexive pronoun is referring to someone doing an action to himself.
We can also use reflexive pronouns to talk about what people can do without
any help. What can they do on their own? That is,
by themselves. We often use the preposition "by" in this case. Let me ask you: Can you
cook dinner by yourself? Can you do laundry by yourself? Can you change a car tire by yourself?
When we want to emphasize that we do something alone, we use "by" with a reflexive pronoun.
Let me ask you: Would you go to a movie by yourself? Are you comfortable eating
dinner by yourself? When do you really enjoy being by yourself? Tell me in the comments.
Whether we mean "alone" or "without any help," we add "all" to mean "completely." Tanya is
not afraid to travel all by herself. In other words, she's not afraid to travel completely
alone. Their great-grandfather built the farmhouse all by himself. In this case,
it means he did it completely without any help from anyone. Think of "all by oneself" as a
set phrase. Don't drop the preposition. But in contrast, when you talk about what you're able
to do independently, you don't need "by," as in: I can do it myself. I'll do it myself. This means
no one has to help me. I'll do it alone. But depending on the context, it could also mean
that I don't expect anyone else to complete the task. I'll be the one to complete it.
Reflexive pronouns also help us emphasize one person in particular and no one else. It could be
you. For example, I myself love to dance, but no one else in my family dances. Often it's someone
of importance or with authority. For example, the boss herself came to congratulate me and praise my
work. Notice how we can place the reflexive pronoun immediately after the subject. But
separation is also possible in conversation. I can't say I'm very artistic myself,
but I agreed to go to a painting event with my friends. Let me ask you what you see in this
video. What am I holding? What am I enjoying? I'm watching TV with a remote control, right?
I have sole possession of the remote control, so I have the remote control all to myself.
When you have something all to yourself, you have sole use of it, complete use of it. No sharing.
Would you like to have a nice hotel suite all to yourself or would you share it with friends?
Let's look at some uses of reflexive pronouns that are considered incorrect,
but the usage is out there, so I want you to be aware of it. Some speakers say "theirselves"
instead of "themselves." Similarly, some speakers say "hisself" instead of "himself."
I don't recommend using these non-standard forms, but you may come across them. Also,
some speakers and writers may use "myself" instead of "me," thinking it
sounds more polite or formal. Let me ask you which sentence has standard grammar.
B is standard. The subject is not doing any action to himself or for himself,
so "me" is the better choice.
Similarly, people may try to use "myself" all alone as a subject.
Let me ask you which sentence is not standard.
A is not standard. It's important to know standard grammar because this is the
grammar that will serve you best in the greatest number of situations. It's also helpful to know
collocations -- how words go together and common expressions, so that's what we'll focus on next.
"Myself" is a reflexive pronoun so it should ref refer back to the subject, but there's one common
exception. It's the phrase "myself included." This phrase means "including me." For example,
many people, myself included, think that Hollywood is producing too many remakes and not enough
original films. The subject of the sentence is "many people," so the reflexive pronoun
"myself" doesn't refer back to the subject, and yet it's become common and acceptable to say
"myself included," and it means "including me." I'm in that group of people who have this opinion.
I know that this last year has been not very easy for all of us, myself included.
Myself included.
Finish this sentence. Many people, myself included, complain that...
Guess the meaning of this expression: full of oneself. Derrick is so full
of himself. He thinks that his ideas are better than anyone else's.
The answer is C - conceited, like arrogant. To be
full of oneself means they have a really high opinion of themselves.
Sam and Woody are trying desperately to kiss me.
Boy, someone's a little full of herself, isn't she?
You are so full of yourself.
A related expression is "to be sure of oneself," and it's not necessarily bad.
It could mean you're confident, but it could also mean you're overconfident, too confident.
You're either very impatient or extremely sure of yourself.
Here are two similar expressions questions. Can you match the examples to the meanings?
Which one is about avoiding others and not being social?
Which one is about not telling anything to others?
So, if you keep it to yourself, you're not sharing. You're not telling anyone.
And if you simply keep to yourself, you're avoiding social interaction.
How about you? Did you keep to yourself as a kid or were you social and outgoing?
Time for a quiz. Ready?
[Music]
And now for a bonus challenge! What's the difference?
"Helping each other" means I helped you and you helped me. When we help ourselves,
we do things for ourselves and no one else. We could also emphasize
the individual: we each helped ourselves.
What do you think is more important,
being kind kind to one another or being kind to oneself? I myself think both are important.
Here's a list of all the questions I've asked you so far. Share your answers in the comments.
That's all for now. Please like and share the video if you found the lesson useful. Remember
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