Reddit Relationship advice.
My wife cheated on me at the party while I was drunk and passed out.
It was my birthday.
And I wanted to celebrate with all of our friends.
My friend threw a big party for me.
So, my best friend was hosting my birthday party at his house.
He was notorious for hosting parties when we were in college, my wife and I attended and we started drinking right after we got there.
We were both having a good time and it felt like old times I had a few too many drinks.
And my wife who usually never has more than one or two, I kept pouring them down her throat.
My wife then got the brilliant idea to go outside on the back porch for a cigarette.
She was having trouble walking by this point.
So I helped her out there.
Once we were outside on the back porch, she started talking about how the party was fun and glad we came to hang out with our friend.
So, I started drinking again and I lost track of time.
Next thing I know, she leaned over, pulled me in with her arm, kissed me, and then we just started to make out for a few minutes.
I could tell my wife was getting aroused.
I guess it was the alcohol. As the night goes on, we are partying, drinking, dancing, and just having a good time. As the night goes on.
I noticed even in my drunken state, That my wife is disappearing on occasion.
I thought she was just using the restroom, but near the end of the night, I see her talk to a guy on and off and they disappear into a bedroom together.
They didn't stay long, maybe a minute or two, they came right out.
So, I didn't think anything of it.
The night goes on with us, still drinking and dancing.
I am starting to get a little lightheaded and not being able to stand up.
So, I find myself a spot on the couch and sit.
My wife is up talking to my buddy.
He is the one hosting the birthday party.
They talk for a few minutes and then my wife comes over and sits next to me and asked me if I was okay.
I told her, yes, I am just a little drunk.
And she giggles.
Then she leans over and kisses me and says, I have to go to the bathroom, when she goes to the bathroom.
I notice she doesn't come back for an hour.
When she gets back, I asked her, is everything okay?
She says, yes, I was feeling a little queasy.
I said, oh, okay.
I am glad you are not sick.
Then, I asked my buddy to get me another drink.
I am absolutely toasted, but I continued to drink.
Until I start nodding off, like I am falling asleep.
My buddy sees this and says, Hey, let's go.
He then comes over and helps me up and takes me upstairs to one of his bedrooms, puts me in the bed and I go right to sleep. At about 3:00ish
am, I am awakened by a noise in the next bedroom.
It's a little bit down the hallway, but it was enough to wake me out of a dead sleep.
As I stumbled out of bed and slowly make my way down the hallway.
When I get to the door to look in, I couldn't believe it.
My wife is having sex with some random guy.
I have never seen in my life.
I said, what the hell?
They both jumped out of their skin.
I said to the guy, this is my wife.
Get away from her.
He moves away from her and goes to pick up his clothes.
I just stare at my wife and say, how could you?.
Really? You are cheating on me in the same house and I am just a few feet away from you.
Wow.
At that point, I go back to the room.
I was asleep in and gather my things.
I walked to the front door, get in the car and drive home.
I get home.
Still in shock at what I saw, about 20 minutes later, my wife comes in with tears, rolling down her face, makeup all messed up.
She starts balling, apologizing profusely.
I shook my head at her and said I was in the next room.
How could you cheat on me with me being so close?
What she said, next shock the hell out of me, the only thing she said was, "IT JUST HAPPENED"
I said, that's all you have to say?.
"IT JUST HAPPENED"
I said, don't talk to me anymore tonight.
The next morning I call up my friend and ask him, did he know the guy who slept with my wife at the party?
He said, what.
What are you talking about?
I explained to him that my wife cheated on me at the party, in the bedroom, down the hall, from where I was sleeping.
He couldn't believe it.
He said he didn't notice anything, because he was downstairs most of the night and he didn't notice my wife go upstairs with anyone.
And he said, he didn't know the guy.
He may have been a friend of someone who he invited.
I got off the phone with my friend. At this point, I am unsure of what to do next, witnessing that made me rethink this whole marriage and how she could be so bold to cheat on me like that.
It's still mid morning.
So, I go take a walk to gather my thoughts
My thoughts on what transpired the night before I get back to the house after walking for about 45 minutes, I walk in and my wife comes up to me and says, she is sorry for what she did.
I said, I don't believe you.
She said, I promise you it was a mistake and not intentional.
I tell her that she needs to leave the house now because we are done.
There was no excuse for you cheating on me like that.
And to do it right under my nose.
I said, you really need to leave.
This is where things got ugly.
She starts screaming at me and then throws something at my head.
She kicks me in the shin while yelling more obscenities until I pushed her out of the way and told her to get out or else someone might call the cops on us for domestic violence.
And so, there I am with an angry wife who can't keep herself from hitting me when provoked and no home life whatsoever.
She is still yelling at me.
As she walks away to our bedroom, she starts packing things and telling me she didn't care that she cheated.
I didn't say anything after she made that horrible comment, a few minutes go by, she grabs about four suitcases and takes them out to her car, gets in and leave
I have no idea where she went.
So, 4 days go by and I haven't heard from my wife.
I am really not concerned, because of what she did.
She calls me and asks, can she come back home?
I said, no, we are done.
Did you think this was just a cooling off period?
No, we are done.
I have an appointment with an attorney this afternoon to get the divorce process started.
She didn't pleads for me not to do that.
I said, it's already in motion.
She hangs up the phone, at that point, I am thinking I won't hear much more from her today, but to my surprise, 30 minutes later, she walks into the house.
She still has a key.
(I didn't get the locks changed yet) and asked me, why am I discarding her so quickly?
I said, you cheated on me and the way you did it, you betrayed me.
We were married for 11 years and all of a sudden.
Alcohol makes you cheat like that.
I told her all of this is on you.
I couldn't imagine my wife of 11 years would cheat on me in a room, down the hall.
She interrupts me and says, but we were drunk.
I said, it doesn't matter.
now, we are done.
There is nothing you can say or do to make me change my mind.
She starts crying again and walks out the door.
Another three days go by and I have to pick up some items from the store.
I get to the store.
Low and behold, I run into the soon to be ex-wife and tell her I need the address to where she is staying for some legal documents.
She refuses to give me an address and walks off.
I said to myself, okay, as she is walking out the door and into the parking lot, I noticed she gets in a car.
The passenger side, and some guy is driving.
I couldn't make out who he was.
I have the address to her parents' house.
So I will give the attorney that address, but, I do have the address to where she works.
I will have the divorce papers served there. At this point.
My goal is to get the divorce done as soon as possible.
Her attitude has changed in less than a week and seems worse than before.
So, I leave the grocery store, get back home.
And I immediately call the attorney and ask him how long will the divorce process take?
He says it could take up to 90 days or longer in some cases.
I was shocked.
I couldn't believe it.
He says that there will have to be a hearing in all of this other paperwork needs to be filed in order for the divorce process to start.
So then, we hang up the phone and he tells me not to worry about anything else until after the 90 days is over.
That's just crazy talk.
It should take no more than 30 days at most, but, this timeframe could take up to six months or longer.
One thing has been on my mind.
Who is she cheating with now?
She cheated on me before, when I caught her at the party.
And now this.. who is she doing it again with? This has been a nightmare relationship for me in the last week.
Is there any Reddit advice you can give to help get over this until my divorce is final.
This concludes this Reddit Relationship Advice Video.