Film Courage: How do you help clients who are hyper-focused on other people’s achievements?
Erica Wernick, Personal Coach, Author and Speaker: I help them get reacquainted with what their true
dream is. I think it’s so easy to look at what everybody else is doing and to decide that’s
what success means and so that’s what I should go after, but we really want to reconnect with what
our true dream is. What is it that we truly want? To tune out the noise, stop looking at what
other people are doing, stop looking at social media. What people are doing on social media,
what they’re posting and really re-connect to what is it that you truly want? I have
this line in my book that I was actually really proud of. I think it’s a good line where I said
When you are trying to replicate someone else’s magic, you are taking yourself out of the running
for your own and I think that’s so important. I think that as long as you are chasing somebody
else’s dream or you’re trying to have or do what other people are having and doing,
you are cutting yourself off from your own fulfilling, really cool journey, really amazing
magical experience you know it's going to be so much more fulfilling if you reconnect to what
it is that you want and go after it in a way that feels good to you as opposed to comparing yourself
to everybody else and trying to replicate what other people are doing I think as long
as you are trying to replicate somebody else's path you're going to get stuck I think we all
have our own path and we we need to find our own path especially in an industry like
Hollywood where there's no one way to do anything you know if you lined up ten successful people
or a hundred successful people and ask them how did you break in or how did you get to where you
are you're probably going to hear a hundred different stories so it's important that we leave
room for us to find our own story and that comes from really letting go and disconnecting from
what you see everybody else doing what's your definition of a high achiever
I that's such a good question because I use that term all the time my definition of a high achiever
is somebody who first of all has a desire for something beyond like the base level you know
like people say oh I want to be a working actor and i'm like really like that's such a base level
thing I understand you want to pay your bills from acting and sure that would be amazing but
like that's one aren't you you're going to want so many more things you know beyond that so I think
like number one it's about the desire the desire for something greater than what's comfortable for
most people and then I think that you know a lot of my work in terms of helping people become high
achievers is about how you think about what you're doing what your belief system is behind what you
are doing so that it leads to higher level risks higher level actions and strategies that then
usually lead to higher level opportunities but so you know in my book I talk about the
10 pillars of the high achiever and it's it's really about how you view what is possible and
how you view what you're capable of you know what you're able to do
so if you're a high achiever you view the world in a way that you believe that anything's possible
and you make decisions based on your desires and based on your dreams instead of based on fear
you know you do things that are not based on those Hollywood rules you know you really go
beyond what I call like the most people pool so you're not doing what most people
are doing you're doing what the smaller pool of high achievers are doing which is you know
you're really you're really looking at the world in a different way and and your own dreams in a
different way like if you have a dream of winning an Oscar or being a millionaire you believe
that not only that it's possible but that it will happen for you and just that belief changes that
it changes the entire trajectory you know of what what potential you have in front of you
so base level let's say filmmaker screenwriter what would that would be they want to work on
a few projects not they're looking to no I mean like maybe my working actor example wasn't the
greatest because i'm definitely not trying to judge anybody's like level but I think that
you know like beyond student films beyond unscripted you know if we're talking about
Hollywood for for screenwriters or for any other kind of craft you know I think that
beyond what most people strive for you know because I think that striving for
like a base level keeps people safe you know I think that most people that
have dreams of succeeding in Hollywood in this industry they have their dreams are beyond
student films or their dreams are beyond you know just paying their bills you know I think a lot of
people dream of telling really interesting stories you know I think people love storytelling and the
art of storytelling you know a lot of the people that I work with they want to make an impact on
people's lives they want to make a difference in the world through storytelling you know I think
that that goes beyond I just want to be able to pay all my bills from my craft I think everybody
wants to be able to pay all the you know bills from their craft but I think the high achievers
they want more they want to they want to go beyond that they don't want to stay safe and comfortable
at whatever level is safe and comfortable what are some of the achilles heels of a high achiever
interesting question one of the things that I personally have struggled with and I consider
myself a high achiever is all like the fact that i'm kind of always reaching for something
right and so I think that that might be an achilles heel of the high achiever where that bar
is always moving and and so that like one thing that i've been working on is being more present
you know being more present in where I am and trying to enjoy the moment
because my eyes are usually always on the next thing you know i'm always reaching i'm always
on that next thing I always want to know my next goal you know right now i'm in this period where
I don't really know for sure what that next goal is for me and i've never experienced that before
it's very uncomfortable to have to just sit here and be present and wait for it to sort of come or
be inspired and so I think that's probably a high achiever's achilles heels that you know they're
not really sometimes struggling with being present and enjoying the journey and enjoying
where they are because their eyes are always on the next thing is there no other way around that
as a high achiever is that just part of the journey so to speak yeah I mean I don't I don't
want to put my own struggles on anybody else and make a blanket statement and say that you know all
high achievers will you know struggle with that I think everybody we all have our own stuff you know
so yeah I think you know everyone's going to have their own struggles but it's really about
how willing are you to do the work to better yourself and to get where you want to go.
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