Transcriber: madjda rezig Reviewer: Emma Gon
Imagine, creating a social network
that connects billions of people across the world.
Picture creating an industry that transforms the way
that we consume energy and travel.
Reflect on what it must feel like to grow up playing tennis
on the courts of Compton to one day manifest your dreams
of becoming some of the greatest athletes in the world.
Now, consider the millions of people who never dare to imagine,
dream or pursue something without even knowing why.
I’ve spent my entire professional career
dealing with other people’s alcohol and drug use, suicides,
physical assaults, sexual relationship violence,
microaggressions, bias incidents on top of mental health issues,
and doing things like strategic planning, policy creation,
working on professional development,
and trying to remain in compliance with ever changing laws.
But I love it, and I really appreciate the opportunity
to have honest and transparent discussions with people
under some of the most challenging circumstances.
To think this has been my career after going to school for art.
Still, every time I encounter someone, I learn something new.
And it's some of my observations that have led to me talking to you today.
So let me provide some context.
One day I was at lunch with a colleague
and she was asking about a recent family vacation I have been on.
So I handed her my phone, as she was looking for a picture,
she pointed out that my hair was really curly
and she didn’t realize I was natural.
I said that I’ve been natural for over a decade,
but I just wear a silk press because I don’t feel like
getting all the questions at work.
She shared with me that she loved her curls
and it makes her sad that I didn’t feel comfortable
wearing mine in a professional setting.
I told her about some of the experiences
that I had with people touching my hair
and constantly asking questions about my hair and she understood my choice.
We talked some more, lunch ended.
And then one day we went to lunch again
and I noticed that her hair was straight.
I complimented her hair, but I didn’t say much.
Until the next time when I saw her and her hair was still straight.
And so I asked her, what’s up?
And she said, “Well, one day
I came to work with my curls down instead of pinned up,
and my supervisor said my hair was fun.
She took fun to mean unprofessional
and thought it would be easier to just straighten her hair.
Now, this might not seem like a big deal to some,
but I watched her light down a bit more each day after that.
And I heard her constantly question if she could perform within
the standards of the field without realizing that she was reshaping them.
So for additional context, let me tell you about a student
who used to come to my office all the time just to talk about life.
One day she pop in just as I was headed out to give a keynote,
I did not have a ton of time,
but I could tell that she was troubled and facing some challenges.
So she comes in and she says that as she was approaching graduation,
which was just a few weeks away,
that she wasn’t excited about any of the job opportunities coming her way
because all she ever wanted to be was a forensic pathologist.
Now, this was a student who majored in something altogether different
despite going to a school with the great forensic science program.
So I asked her why, and she said
that her high school guidance counselor told her
that it wouldn’t be a good fit,
it would be too challenging, that she wouldn’t have support.
I question this because this was a student
who graduated from high school with a 3.75 GPA
and was about to graduate from college with nearly a 4.0.
As I talked to this student more, all that I could conclude was
that that guidance counselor may have been operating
from a space of unconscious bias.
Unconscious bias refers to those attitudes
or stereotypes that affect our understanding,
our attitudes and our decisions in an unconscious manner.
And stereotypes are about those preconceived notions
that we apply to entire groups without taking individuals into account,
other times are our assumptions.
But whatever it is, if our lack of awareness
that our mind is operating from that place that challenges us
Now, I don’t know for a fact, but it was unconscious bias
that led to that guidance counselor’s recommendation.
But what I do know is that when I asked this student
if this was something she would consider pursuing in graduate school,
she repeated the sentiment that it might be too challenging
given the lack of representation in the field.
Let me share one more quick story.
I have a friend who could not be more different than me.
I mean, the only thing we share in common is our gender identity.
But I am so grateful that life has brought us together.
This friend is from the Appalachia region.
And so she often talks about how people there are told not to leave
because they'll be confronted with too many obstacles beyond the mountains.
As I listen to her tell me these stories,
all that I can think is for the folks hearing those messages.
What are they risking when they never dare to imagine,
dream or pursue something and they don’t even know it?
When you couple stories like these with ones
that I hear every day from some of the people who I work with,
from family, from friends,
what I started to notice is I was often hearing things like,
I feel like an imposter, I don’t deserve this,
I shouldn't be here. I can't.
And it made me curious. And so as I collected more
and more of these narratives, I started to look for themes.
And as I looked at things, one key thing stood out.
And that was that they were all
doubting themselves and didn’t know it.
So this leads me to believe that just like we all hold unconscious biases,
there are many people who are dealing with unconscious doubt.
I am defining unconscious doubt
as those uncertainties that live in undisclosed parts of your mind,
hindering your thoughts or progress.
Now, as I named this for people, I see light bulbs go off.
So I ask you,
when you think about your life and you consider
how much and in what areas have you allow yourself
to doubt yourself to the extent to which it hinders you.
What will be different?
So I share that my entire career has been centered
around having difficult conversations.
But the one thing that I find easy is finding the good in people.
And I recognize that every organization and community
is only as good as its people.
Yet we fail to recognize how things like unconscious bias
can have an long term impact on the people on the receiving end.
So let me detour for a moment.
I told you a few stories, but let me detour.
How many of you are familiar with the African impala?
Show of hands. African impala. Okay.
It’s an antelope, a really nice animal,
if you get a chance to see it.
The African impala can jump a height of 10 feet
and it can leap a distance of 30 feet.
Yet if you were to see it at the zoo, it can be restricted in a space
surrounded by as little as a three foot wall. Why is that?
Now, how high did I say it could jump?
And how far it can leap?
So how can it be restricted by such a small barrier?
Well, I’ve been told that the African impala will only jump
when it can see where it’s going to land.
That means that it will only trust its abilities
if it can see its outcome.
So get this.
Sometimes we miss out on a world of possibilities
over three feet of doubt that we didn’t know was there.
How does that happen?
It happens because we go through life,
hearing messages about ourselves and who we are
and internalizing messages about who we can become.
Sometimes is that we tell ourselves,
if we fail, we prove them right.
But we forget that to avoid failure is to avoid success.
In a conversation that I had
with doctors Juanita Brown and Francis Baldwin,
they said to me that language can be life affirming or life denying.
So we must choose words that build the heart and mind.
Anything that we do is for the public good.
And everything that happens for the public good
happens through people, all people.
So treat people well.
And don’t let your unconscious bias
become someone else’s unconscious doubt.
Thank you.