It was only a matter of time before we got here.
With a society hell-bent on counting calories and scientifically engineering the ultimate
snack foods, it makes sense that there are plenty of anomalous foods rolling around in
the dark. Delicious, nutritious, suspicious, malicious,
we’ve got edible entities to satisfy all sorts of hungers!
If I’m being honest, I’ve probably consumed my fair share of anomalous foods and drinks.
There’s no way Mountain Dew Baja Blast is that colour without requiring some sort of
unexplainable substance. And marshmallow bananas? There’s no way
anyone would willingly eat one of those, but I keep finding myself at the bottom of empty
bags. But those are low-tier anomalies, Safe-class,
or even neutralized. The ones we’re discussing today are much
stranger. They could probably solve world hunger, too,
but the Foundation isn’t ready for that conversation.
Hello horror heads, and welcome back to the scariest channel on YouTube: Top 5 Scary Videos.
I’m your horror host, Keegan Hughes, and today we’re counting down the Top 5 Scary
SCP Creatures Based on Food. Shout out to Comics and the Cross on Twitter
for suggesting this episode! Put on your chef’s hat, and catch up on
the latest episode of Binging with Babish, because today we’re going gruesomely gourmet.
Before we get started, make sure to give this video a big thumbs up, and subscribe for more
flavourful fun! Outstanding, let's rev up those fryers!
NUMBER FIVE: SCP-2107 You’ve heard of Ecto-Cooler, now get ready
for Diet Ghost. SCARE YOUR THIRST!
MADE WITH NATURAL GHOSTS. Sounds delicious if you ask me. I just want
to know the difference between a ghost and a natural ghost.
Is it like the difference between organic and regular produce?
Or like, a ghost that died by accident versus a ghost that was murdered?
I’m genuinely curious, let me know what you think the difference is.
Diet Ghost is a can of soda pop that appears in various places every once in a while.
The liquid itself is pretty much the same as any other soft drink on the market, but
when you drink it the anomalous properties manifest.
Around five minutes after you drink it, you’ll begin to experience paranormal activity.
Nobody else can see what’s happening, but you’ll believe that you’re being haunted
similarly to what folks expect from a stereotypical haunting.
The effects will continue until your body breaks down the Diet Ghost into waste, so
it can last from anywhere between one and three hours.
The intensity of the haunting is proportional to how much you drink, so take it slow, know
your limits. Some folks have been haunted to death, while
others are simply taken for the ride. If I know anything about soft drinks, it’s
that the Diet version is always a pale shadow of the Original.
Where’s Ghost Classic? I need to know! NUMBER FOUR: SCP-294
This is a very special break-room coffee machine. It seems to be a pretty average vendor of
hot drinks, but instead of the classic alphanumeric pad and a menu, we just get a QWERTY keyboard.
For 50 cents you can type in any liquid, and it will be poured into a 12 oz paper cup.
It can produce any liquid: water, coffee, tea, beer, soda, acid, oil, molten iron and
glass. If it can be a liquid, it can be poured out.
Attempts to produce non-liquids, like diamonds, have proven fruitless, though.
The range of beverages this machine can produce is jaw-dropping, with some abstract ideas
like “a cup of music” yielding anomalous, yet relatively harmless liquids.
One must be careful while using this, though, as reckless use can cause a whole lot of trouble.
294 was placed in a break room to cut costs, and soon enough some less-than-responsible
orders were put in. One time, somebody ordered a Cup of Joe.
You can imagine how that went down. An order of the Perfect Drink sent a man into
shock, who then later committed suicide because nothing would compare.
That one probably had more to do with hubris than anything else.
Another thing to note about 294 is that the liquid has to come from a pre-existing source,
the machine cannot just create matter. If something doesn’t exist, or is in extremely
limited quantities, the machine may be unable to produce it, displaying OUT OF RANGE on
the digital screen. It also seems to have knowledge of people’s
preferences and experiences, being able to produce people’s favourite drinks just by
inputting “my favourite” or something similar.
Fifty cents doesn’t seem too steep for your favourite, eh?
NUMBER THREE: SCP-871 This one could put all sorts of bakeries out
of business. Could solve some hunger issues too, although
I’m not so sure cake meets the nutritional requirements of your average person.
871 is many cakes. Many, many cakes.
237 of them, currently, but the Foundation is working to keep it that way.
These cakes vary in appearance and size, with the smallest being a cupcake, and the largest
being a 2 meter baumkuchen. You know, the tree cake made on a spit?
Moving on, when any instance is eaten in its entirety, it will reappear approximately 24
hours later as a similar cake. Small variations may occur.
If any cake is damaged in ways other than being eaten by humans, it will be replaced
immediately. This seems fun, right? A whole bunch of free
cake as long as you can keep up! Well, as the cakes seem to produce duplicates
every 24 hours if not consumed, they could potentially become exponentially self-replicating.
Infinite cakes forever. This kind of uncontrolled outbreak could end
the world in a couple of months. Cakes covering every surface, contaminating
sources of water, crushing infrastructure, ruining your Sunday Best.
Honestly, compared to a lot of other options, I’ll take the cake apocalypse.
Just imagine, a tidal wave of cakes heading your way.
Nothing else to do but sing happy birthday and prepare for the end.
NUMBER TWO: SCP-3521 Oh dado, where did you get all these bananas?
This SCP consists of sixteen gel tablets, made by dado in association with an unknown
assassin. When consumed, an extremely large number of
unpeeled bananas will manifest in the subject’s stomach at an indeterminate rate.
It seems that the bananas were meant to cause a lethal dose of ionizing radiation, as bananas
contain trace amounts of radioactive potassium. However, the cause of death is most definitely
the 9.15 million kilograms of bananas bursting forth from the subject’s body.
Yeah, the radiation almost seems like a non-issue compared to that.
That’s like Donkey Kong’s banana hoard eviscerating you from the inside.
Upon recovery by the Foundation, some tests were run.
They did not go well. The D-class who took the pill was immediately
crushed by a mass of bananas. These tropical tubes then took over the testing
chamber, and then destroyed the site’s lower levels.
Bananas were crushed under the weight of other bananas, leading to radioactive banana goop
pouring throughout the Foundation site. This led to dozens of fatalities, and the
decommissioning of the site. Seems like a bit of an oversight, huh.
I’m sure the site director went a little… bananas upon learning what happened.
Yeah, that was lazy. In the immortal words of dado: good. U trust
dado and everthing be ok. No worry. Banana even better than plutonium.
Wiser words have never been spoken. NUMBER ONE: SCP-4252
Beans, beans, the musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you manifest in a Foundation
site next to a bunch of weird stuff. Hmmm, that’s not how that song goes, is
it? SCP-4252 is a humanoid entity seemingly connected
to four other objects known as 4252 A1, A2, A3, and A4.
These are a clock, a suitcase, a coffee cup, and a 2015 Toyota Highlander, respectively.
Each of these objects infinitely produce baked beans through unknown methods.
More beans than anyone could reasonably eat. Enough to inspire Bill Foster to think about
thos beans. Keep on fighting the good fight, Bill.
If you recite a certain poem aloud, the humanoid 4252 will manifest.
Jethusent the Mighty King, Please bless our presence with your own, Consume our Bubbling
Beanous Bile, From up atop your sparkling throne.
You gotta shower Jethusent with praise when he arrives, or he’ll just head out.
If you do a good enough job complimenting the bean lord, he will consume all of the
baked beans produced by the other anomalous objects.
However, he can’t do it if you’re watching, so all recording devices must be turned off,
and folks better look away. Once Jethusent is done, he’ll disappear
with a forceful belch, sometimes clocking in at over 120 decibels.
That’s one way to show some gratitude for a meal.
If you attempt to summon him again too soon, you’ll get a dial tone and a recorded message:
Not ready yet, give me like a month and I’ll get back to you.
Fair enough, that was indeed a lot of beans. Interestingly enough, 4252-A1 no longer produces
beans as the other do. During an incident classified as Incident-01,
a wizard manifested in the room and zapped the clock.
Following this, Jethusent manifested and tackled the wizard.
The tussle that followed resulted in Jethusent breaking his arm, and killing the wizard.
Obviously upset, Jethusent demanifested with the wizard’s corpse.
Now, any time he shows up, it can be noted that he has a mechanical replacement limb.
The lord of the beans waits for no one. OUTRO
Man, some of these are super odd, and they’re not even -J entries!
Maybe we’ll do a video about those soon. What did you think?
Would you eat any of the anomalous foods from the list?
I think the banana pill would be a good cyanide capsule replacement for spies.
Kill yourself, destroy the enemy’s stronghold in a hilarious manner.
Win - win if you ask me. Let me know what you’re thinking down in
the comments. Speaking of comments, let’s have a quick
look at some of your more gourmet ones from Top 5 Most Disturbing Horror Movie Monster
Transformations - PART 2: Judson Gaiden asks “Why do you say thee
and ay instead of the and uh? Why does EVERYONE talk like that nowadays? It sounds so annoyingly
robotic!” While I can’t speak for everyone, I can
tell you that I annunciate my vowels like that for the sole purpose of annoying you.
I’m glad it’s working! THE! AY! THE! AY! B B 1 says “I had to stop eating my breakfast
to watch this lmao” Probably a good call unless your breakfast
was dry toast and seltzer water. Don’t want your brain to mistake scrambled eggs for something
else… Morgan Camilla asks “Alright, do you get
your eyebrows done or what? They’re unreasonably nice.”
I always thought they were well within reason! But no, these are all-natural. The camera
mercifully hides my shadow of a unibrow, too! Toucan Chef says “Awesome sweatshirt where
can we get it? Is your fashion sense Hereditary?” It’s actually a t-shirt layered over a long-sleeve,
so not a true sweatshirt! It was a gift, but I’m pretty sure A24 made it in collaboration
with Online Ceramics, so keep an eye out for a re-print!
MILKYbars100 says “If a movie a decade old can still make you shift a little bit in your
seat or go “man that’s messed up” from effects, they did the style good.”
I wholeheartedly agree! I love it when a movie can make me tense up based solely on effects.
Even better if I’m totally disgusted, but still smiling!
And that’s all the time we have for today! Before I skedaddle, make sure to give this
video a big thumbs up, and subscribe if you’re looking for more scrumptious SCPs! Thanks
for watching, and I’ll see you next time!