It's a hot topic in 2019. What is it about gender roles in children? Let's
make a distinction as we begin this video between gender roles and sex or
gender identity. Sex is typically associated with the
genitalia that children are born with. And there's an assigned sex that is
listed on the birth certificate. Gender identity has to do with how children and
people develop an identity associated with a gender. Gender roles are those
activities or occupations or cultural attachments that are associated with a
particular gender. So, I wanted to make that little distinction there to begin
with. As we make that distinction, let's also agree right here at the
beginning of the video that we're going to have a discussion about how these
things develop in children without necessarily trying to assert what it
should be. Sound good to you? In terms of gender identity by age 2, children are
typically very aware of the physical differences between the sexes. Before age
3, most can easily identify themselves as either being a boy or a girl. And by age
4, most children have a fairly stable sense of their gender identity. I'm
talking about the norms and the developmental expectations. For some
children, it's not as clear. Gender identity is affected by all kinds of
factors. Obviously the family, what the expectations are, the culture, what their
role models are. All of these things can contribute. And there's also physical and
psychological factors that impact the formation of gender identity. Some
children may not have as clear a sense of their gender identity and may
identify as a boy, as a girl as something in-between or something else. And this
identity tends to be fairly stable over time. I grew up in a fairly conservative
environment and culture where there were only 2 options. I've learned as a
psychologist that in terms of gender identity... And we'll talk about gender
roles in a minute too. But in terms of gender identity, there tends to be a
distribution. Let me show you what I mean. I've drawn this beautiful graph for you
that shows 2 curves. A feminine curve depicted here in red. And a masculine
curve depicted here in blue. What I'm talking about our traits or
characteristics and we can apply this also to gender roles or stereotypes
where there tends to be a feminine side and a masculine side. Now, you'll see that
on the feminine side, the curve Peaks here which are traits and
characteristics that would be typically or stereotypically, feminine. And it
trails off into some traits that are overlapping with the blue curve, the
masculine curve. So, these are traits that could be either feminine or masculine
and we're calling that androgynous. You've probably heard that term before
as well. In terms of gender identity, there are some who clearly identify on
the female side. There are others who clearly identify on the masculine side
and there's no question. It's those that are in this middle category that seem to
have some sense of being somewhere in-between or something else. Now, how
does this relate to gender roles? Some roles or activities have traditionally
been associated with feminine. Other roles have traditionally or
stereotypically been identified with masculine. This comes from our culture,
from the media, from environmental or biological factors
that contribute. When it comes to helping our children with their own gender
identity and their own gender roles, I think it's good for us as parents to
develop a culture of openness and acceptance.
The statistics are really alarming about how children fare if they are confused
about or don't fit into the cultural norms for their gender identity or the
gender roles that they choose. In fact, there's a very high suicide rate among
children and teens and adults who have gender identity issues. As we develop a
culture of acceptance, instead of judgment, every child needs to
feel loved and accepted. You'll remember if you've watched this channel very long
that your job as a parent is to love them no matter what and even if. What if
we could boost our children's self-esteem. In fact, I want you to watch
another video right after you finish this one, it's called "Ways to boost a
child's self-esteem". You can link to it right up there in the card. Parents can
contribute to healthy gender identity and role development by creating a
diversity rich experience. You might for example make toys available that are
typically associated with either gender to all of your children and allow them
to explore the diverse interests and roles that they might be able to adapt
as a person. Again, all children have a right to be treated with kindness and
love and acceptance and openness without any feeling of being excluded or bullied.
Thank you for being such a conscious positive parent. The fact that you found
this video shows that you're looking for ways to help your children. Please spend
some time in the Positive Parenting Playlist here on the channel. You're
going to find dozens. Maybe even hundreds of videos there that will help you in
your role as a parent.