Stay tuned and I'm going to give them to you.
I am Rebecca Zung.
I am a lawyer and a narcissist negotiation expert and
on this channel, in these videos,
I give you tips and tricks on how to smack down
that narcissist in negotiations and in real life, as well.
So, if that is something that you are looking to do,
I invite you to subscribe to this channel and
hit that notification bell.
All right, so let's talk about ways to defeat that narcissist
or the signs that you have defeated that narcissist, actually
like, okay, you're negotiating with them and
you're trying to figure out like, how it's going,
Are you close? Have you defeated them?
Do you think that you're kind of on the way to defeating them?
Because, sometimes it may be hard to tell
because they don't want you to know, obviously,
I mean they want it to look like they're winning at all costs and
at all times and they're never going to let on.
I mean, even if they're losing badly and things
aren't going their way and you’re showing them evidence
that things aren't going their way,
they're still going to say ‘‘I'm winning, I'm winning.
It's going my way, totally is’’.
I mean, because that's how they've gotten
along in life all along, you can show them,
‘‘Hey, look, these text messages show
that you've been cheating’’ and
‘‘Nope, that's not what that says’’,
that's how they get along and
I mean, I was actually just talking to
one of my private clients recently and
she was telling me that she really appreciated
one of my recent videos, which was
‘‘4 signs that the narcissist is losing control’’,
which you can check out yourself if you'd like and
she said she loved that video because she was like,
a lot of times, she was saying
‘‘I'm afraid, I don't want them to lose control.
I'm afraid of doing things that
are going to make them lose control.
I don't want that to happen’’.
But actually she could see that that meant
that she was starting to get there,
that she was starting to make headway,
that she was starting to cover ground,
that she was getting closer to her goal, where she wanted to be.
So that it was actually okay
in this case, she was dealing with a husband,
but, sometimes you're dealing with business partner.
I've actually dealt with quite a few situations
where people are dealing with
maybe a family member in a probate situation,
something like that, but it's okay,
if they're actually starting to lose control because that means
that they are showing signs of being defeated as well and
so you don't necessarily need to fear that and
also remember that they have conditioned you,
they have conditioned you to believe that
they are winners, that you don't know what you're doing,
that you don't know how to think, that they do,
that they're smarter, that you can't trust your odds,
that you can only trust what they think,
they've really conditioned you to believe that and
a lot of times, your thoughts,
things that you think are actually your thoughts,
are actually thoughts they have conditioned you to believe.
So, six signs that you're starting to defeat that narcissist.
So, what happens is, they start going back
to that well of things that worked for them in the past.
They don't have a whole lot of tricks in their arsenal,
they have their things that worked for them,
so they go back to whatever worked for them in the past and
I mean, they have these patterns,
they have these playbooks that worked and
that's why it's kind of interesting.
I mean, when you start to study what they're like,
they're pretty predictable in the sense that you
kind of can tell how they're going to behave,
even though it's pretty awful,
but you can pretty much tell how they're going to behave.
So, they'll start off kind of small and
then they'll kind of work up to the things that,
when it's really bad defeat.
So, the love-bombing might start being the first kind of sign.
Then, the next thing is, Okay, that didn't work,
so let me go to the next thing and
that's when they start to get a bit more desperate,
You might start to see some crazy texts at this point.
You might start to see some little undertones
of not-so-nice texts or maybe some even like, threatening
sort of language in the communications you're receiving,
so that, it's starting to ramp up just slightly,
you starting to feel that heat rise, because they're starting
to feel mmm, like it's coming.
All right, so that's number two.
This is where you start to see like,
where they kind of start to get like a little bit desperate,
where they start to get a little bit crazy and
so sometimes you'll start to see them just say weird things,
like, okay, where did that come from?
They get a little bit outlandish sometimes and
so that's how it kind of starts,
they kind of get a little bit crazier, crazier, crazier and
until they're just full crazy and
into collapse and they just become undone and
by the way, the miniseries with Hugh Grant ‘‘The undoing’’
great example of that whole thing and
I actually did a whole video on that,
if you want to check it out,
really great example of that whole thing.
So, those first three are all about them.
It's all about the narcissists themselves.
So, those are all signs that you've defeated the narcissist.
That's about the narcissists themselves.
So, the last three, I want to kind of focus on
signs you've defeated the narcissists.
I want to focus on you.
Signs that you've defeated the narcissists
but focusing on you, because that's really
when you know that you've defeated the narcissist
because you feel it on this side of the fence.
Alright, so number four is,
It's like they say things that normally in the past
would have gotten you all like upset.
It's like, Superman with the bullets that just pop off your chest
or Wonder Woman, they just went right off your wrist and
you're like, did somebody say something?
I thought I heard something, but nothing.
I got nothing. It didn't even like faze me at all.
Like when you're not emotionally triggered by that at all,
you know you've actually defeated the narcissist.
Okay, that's number four.
What do I mean by that?
That means that you've ethically
manipulated the manipulator.
They think they've gotten away with something,
you've let them on to believe that
they won, that they got something out of you and
you actually manipulated them into taking exactly
what you wanted them to take.
So, you do your best Meryl Streep or Al Pacino
or whatever it is, and
you went, ‘‘Oh my God, I can't believe it, this is all terrible’’,
whatever, and because you took your ego out of it, because
you know what? They have to feel like they won, and
that's how it goes.
It's okay, it's fine.
That's going to be how it is.
You have to let them think it's their idea or whatever it is,
so that's number five.
Number six, the last one, this is the best one really.
Not only is no emotion,
you have no fear in interacting with them,
you receive e-mails from them,
you see them, you talk to them, you have no fear.
I get so many emails from people who have done my programs,
who watch my videos,
all the things that I've told you guys to do and
then you tell me that that's the miracle;
that you’ve gotten the outcomes you wanted,
all those things,
but the miracle is, that the fear has disappeared.
because that's your goal, defeating that narcissist.
Where do you start? You start by getting
my free ‘‘Crush my negotiation’’ prep worksheet
at winmynegotiation.com.
You can join me in my free private Facebook group
‘‘Narcissist Negotiators with Rebecca Zung’’
come join me there and
of course, like this video, share it,
drop me that comment, tell me ‘‘No fear’’.
Subscribe to this channel, hit that notification bell.
We're here for you,
today is the first day to start negotiating your best life.
Thank you so much for stopping by and
I will definitely see you in the next video.