- Um-- - Mm--
- Boy. - It's got some bite to it, y'all!
( music playing )
Studies show that if you're from the midwestern part of United States,
you call it "pop." if from the South, you call it all "Coke,"
and if you're from everywhere else, you call it "soda."
Whatever you call it, we're drinking it today, because it's time for...
All right, we're gonna be taste testing some discontinued sodas
that we bought on eBay,
which means they are aged.
- Vintage. - Mm.
- Or probably horrible. - Right.
We will then judge whether we should bring it back
or say, "Nah, that's wack!
Leave it discontinued."
- Yes, okay-- - And let's get to the--
- Let's get to the first one. - Yeah, first one.
Coca-Cola introduced Vault in 2005.
It's a citrus soda- energy drink hybrid,
and we have a acquired the zero-calorie version, Vault Zero!
We paid $24 for two disfigured bottles.
- Dang! - This is one of them.
They have been warped over time.
This is what happens to Vault as it ages.
- I-- it's like-- - Negative pressure.
The bottle is just--
it's just choking the beverage.
Now this may explain it, 'cause in 2006, Vault Zero was reformulated
in response to a lawsuit over allegations
that the ingredients in Vault Zero had the potential,
in certain circumstances, to combine to form carcinogenic compounds.
The expiration date on our bottles is November of 2006.
- What the crap? - So we've got 12 years
of well-aged carcinogenic compounds.
- I'm so thirsty all of a sudden. - Yeah!
But I can't-- all right.
So-- man!
I feel like I need to be careful when I open it.
You're not gonna get cancer by opening it.
- No. I-- - We gotta drink it to do that.
No, I think that the bottle is gonna go--
- And then it's gonna-- - Well, let's see.
- Make those sound effects when you do it. - Okay, let's see.
Okay.
No, it's got negative pressure.
It's not gonna-- it's pulling things into--
- Oh, gosh! It's permanently warped. - "Oh, gosh" what?
- Yeah. - It's not popping back out.
It's coming-- it's coming out-- No, permanently warped.
- It's permanently warped. - Okay.
I've been really watching my figure,
so I only drink diet carcinogenic compound.
So--
Really glad that we got the Zero version.
- Pour yourself some of this. - It's nice and cold.
( sighs ) Okay.
Looks like Mello Yellow or Mountain Dew,
but almost has a more neon--
almost like something that--
that the Ninja Turtles would've had to dispose of.
Yeah.
Radioactive.
- ( sniffing ) - Very citrusy.
No surprise there.
Smells like cleaner.
It would taste less like cleaner if it was carbonated.
It has a Powerade--
- a very Poweradey taste to it. - Yeah. Right.
- Um-- - Um--
I-- to me, it tastes fine.
I think I'm going with the packaging.
- whether it should be brought back or not for this one. - Oh, okay.
- Aesthetics. - 'Cause that's pretty cool, man.
Look at that "V".
It's got a "V" on it. Zero, V Zero.
That's what they should call it when they bring it back again.
V Zero.
I don't think they're bringing it back again.
- V-Zero. No, it's up to us. - Ooh, don't say that.
If we say it's gonna be brought back, they're gonna bring it back.
I think there's just too many products similar to this
that don't necessarily cause cancer.
- They just might cause cancer. - That's a good point.
You know, you don't wanna know for sure you're getting cancer.
Uou wanna know there's a chance you're getting cancer.
- True. - So, because of that--
Back in 1994, Starbucks released Mazagran Spiced Coffee Soda.
Now, we paid $67.78 for this drink...
Hmm.
...in this collectable bottle
that expired in 1996.
The year we graduated from high school.
The eBay seller described this soda as,
"A mint, unopened, extremely rare pre-Frappuccino brand
bottle of Starbucks Mazagran Spiced Coffee Soda.
This is the very first ready to drink, consumer tested,
but not nationally released item in Starbucks brand history.
I wouldn't recommend opening or attempting to drink the contents
of this collectible bottle."
You know what we should do? We should open and drink--
Both: The contents of this collectible bottle.
- Yep! - Oh!
There was some fizz.
Oh, there was. Just a teeny.
- Just a little teeny? - Oh! Just a teeny.
- Let me-- - Smell that.
- Mazagran! - Mmm. Wow!
- Mazagran! - Carbonated coffee.
Pour it. I'm pretty--
I never smelled Mazagran before.
- Excited about this. - Until now.
Come on, where's your-- where's your form?
Oh, look at that! Ooh!
It still got bubbles.
Yeah, it's got a head on it.
That-- that's quite.
That's some strong carbonation.
Look at that. It's still there.
From 1996.
That was back when Starbucks were only on every other corner.
- Right. Mm-hmm. I remember those days. - All right.
- Dink it. - Has a chocolatey smell to it.
- Ooh, it really does! - Mmm.
Maybe it turned into chocolate.
That's odd.
- But-- - It's like holiday-ish to me.
And that's a good thing!
- ( smacking lips ) - It's good!
I don't find anything off-putting about this at all.
I might drink the whole bottle when no one's watching.
You think there's pudding in it?
- I don't know why I'm holding my glass like this. - Now am I crazy in--
We've had carbonated coffee on the show,
in "Buy It Before-- "Try It Before You Can Buy It."
- And it taste a lot like this. - Yeah.
But this has a vanilla taste.
- Whoo! - This tastes better than the one we made.
Link:
Next up, we've got one I never remember hearing about.
7UP Gold!
Not even the touch of King Midas could've saved this soda failure
developed by Dr Pepper.
It launched and was also discontinued in 1988.
We paid $16.52 for this bottle
that expired in May of 1989.
Dang!
This is an old soda, man!
- Yeah, it is. - We were 10 years old,
which means you weren't born.
I was 12, actually, in '89. You were probably 11.
- No, '88 when it first came out. - Oh!
This--
- It expires in '89. - Okay.
- Yeah. - 7UP Gold?
- Made by Dr Pepper. - It doesn't look gold.
- It looks-- - Black.
Was it gold at one point?
Maybe it's--
It's cinnamon flavored.
This may be some of the oldest soda
ever consumed on the internet.
And you're here for it.
- Thank you. - Absolutely no carbonation left.
I'm telling you, them Mazagran people, they got something figured out.
I don't know how they kept that carbination in there for 30 years, but they did.
Or 20 years, however many years it was.
Mmm.
- Smells-- - Oh, wow!
Smells caramely but kinda rancid.
Doesn't smell like something you should drink, it smells like something that--
Medicinal.
- Yeah. - But again if there's--
It smells like a byproduct of a process.
You know what I'm saying?
Let's taste it.
Dink it, drink it.
Oh!
The cinnamon!
Cinn-- cinnamon!
- Ooh, spicy! - Comes late.
- Whoo! - Comes late but it--
Ah! It--
I mean, it's flat. You gotta get past that.
I think probably--
my guess is that this bottle achieved some sort of stasis,
like 20 years ago,
and it's just been exactly the same since then
and it will forever be this way.
'Cause it just tastes like flat soda.
It doesn't taste like something spoiled
or bacteria got in there or anything.
- Yeah. - It just tastes like old soda
that you could tell somebody was trying something
that definitely had no chance of working.
But the cinnamon-y quality is like...
- it's subtle. - Subtle. Subtle cinnamon,
that's what they should've called it.
- A subtle suprise. - Subtle Cinnamon from 7UP.
I think that's-- I think it needs to come back
just because that slogan is so good.
"7UP with a subtle cinnamon surprise."
Subtle cinnamon surprise!
- Yeah! - So should we bring it back?
- Link:
Following the release of 2008's
Mountain Dew Raspberry Citrus Voltage infused with ginseng--
- You remember that. - That was a mouthful.
They released this diet version--
Bring it in, Rhett. In 2011.
Now we paid $26.20, including shipping for this can
which expired in June of 2011.
Both: "Diet Moutain Dew Voltage Raspberry Citrus Diet Dew."
"With other natural flavors."
It's got "Diet Dew" on it twice
just in case you forgot what it was
when you started reading that really long title.
They go, "Let's put it in the end, too. They'll forget it's diet!"
I mean, this is a niche soda, man.
Let's pour it.
Now, there's rumors floating around
that even though it is certainly discontinued in America
that there's some place on Earth this is still sold.
And we started-- Ooh, it's got some effervescent.
It's got some fizz. Got some fizz.
- We reached out to Mountain Dew - Ooh, it's blue!
in all different countries,
and the only place that responded was Moutain Dew Australia,
which told us that they did not sell it in Australia.
So now we know it's not there.
Look at that! That is beautiful!
Low cal, too.
Love lookin'--
drinking stuff that looks unnatural.
It's cool. Got a cool can, man.
Ooh, smell it! This has got all
- its initial properties. - It's very candyish.
It's smells like a--
smells like a sour treat.
- Sour treat. Sour Patch. - Sour Patch Kid.
- It's like Sour Patch Kid blood. - Dink.
Drink it. The blood of a Sour Patch--
You cut the head off of a Sour Patch Kid,
- this is what you get. - Drain it.
It's nice to experience carbonation again in this episode.
- Um-- - Mm.
- Boy! - It's got some bite to it, ya'll.
I think it just needs a couple extra words in its name
and then I'd like it.
You know, if you gave me just some more
descriptors in the name, I'd be all over it.
- You know what? - It's not bad.
It tastes like a fizzy, melted freezer pop.
Freezer prop.
I just wanted to say--
make it look like I knew what you were saying.
But now that you actually heard me say it--
- Freezer pop. It's not bad. - You know, like a melted--
- Like a melted blue Chilly Willy. - Blue Chilly Willy.
Yeah.
- Does it or does it not? - It's not bad.
- Honestly, it's not bad. - The flavor--
The flavor's kinda weak, though.
I think it's just the flavor's died a little bit
over the past couple of years. You know?
This thing is--
This particular ones were like six or seven years old?
- Yeah. - So I think that this could work.
I mean, I don't drink this kinda drink anymore,
but if I did make decisions and drink this kinda drink
I'd drink this kinda drink.
- I'd drink this drink. - Voltage.
Rhett:
So there you have it.
Three out of four of our sodas are making a comeback.
- Yeah! Thanks to us! - Well, we'd like 'em to.
And thanks to you for liking, commenting, and subscribing.
You know what time it is.
Hi! I'm Molly from England.
And it's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
Click the bottom link to watch this episode from the beginning.
And click the top link
to watch us taste some sodas that have been mixed
and try to determine what's in them
- Yes. - in Good Mythical More!
And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality is gonna land.
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