One of the earliest sessions was like, go around the group.
And this is where you can say an issue that you've got with someone.
I'm like, ‘Cool’.
And everyone, like, went around the group and said something.
And then it got to me, and people were just like, ‘It's kind of hard to understand how
you talk sometimes.
Sometimes it's a bit too complicated and you don't just get to the point’.
And I was like, ‘Okay, yeah, it's understandable’.
And that was it.
And I was like, ‘Man, I guess I'm pretty good, I don't really have to change anything,
do I?’.
We did several months’ worth of these sessions, and I'm watching the people in my band open
up about themselves and be confronted by things which in turn shape the way that they see
themselves in the world.
But for me, I'm still like, I'm still in the same spot.
What happened in the last session was like, Now lead guitarist Jeff's like, ‘I got something
to say.
I got to say it.
Why don't you acknowledge me when you see me’?
And I'm like,’ What are you talking about?’.
He's like, ‘I see you in public, and you don't even acknowledge that I'm there’.
This is like full on news to me.
Complete revelation.
I live in my own little world and like, a lot of like, I don't I don't see like, it's
not just them.
I just don't see lots of people.
And he's like, ‘You're a very intense person, you're a very intense person and you're very
sensitive person’.
And the combination of the two there seems to be a wall with you all the time.
And they're like, ‘We know when something's up with you, you can change the entire feeling
of a room with the click of a finger, like, and it's incredibly intense and difficult
to be around and’.
Then it's like, my wife told me about this before, but I didn't realise it was like this,
and they took it to be me pushing them away and to be like anger.
And it was the exact opposite.
The exact opposite.
What I was needing was like … it was my friends.
When you realise you just haven't communicated enough to understand each other's lives.
And after 20 years, that's a lot of life.
And I'm like, man, well done with, like, with dealing with a person like me, like, well
done.
Surviving this intense nature.
They provided me with the mirror that I've never.
I've never had.
And that's like I mean, it's humbling and it's saddening.
It's like it's just incredibly emotional.
But at the same point in time, it's like I'm so immensely grateful for them for doing that.
What I've learned recently has been it's healthy to be vulnerable.
It's healthy to be able to express yourself.
And at the end of the day, if everyone could have a little bit more of that and a little
bit less fear surrounding judgement, I think we'd all be a hell of a lot healthier.