imagine the typical picture of a successful person they're smart they're healthy they're hard working
they're staying on track following a routine they might be a little stubborn or judgmental
rough around the edges but in terms of routine and consistency they're essentially
flawless committed perfect perhaps someone like an estj or entj comes to mind
so if you're an enfp this probably isn't you and
one of the reasons for that is our perception of time which is very different from a lot of
other types i'm going to get into that and a lot of other reasons in this video
hanging out with an enfp can be a ton of fun one of the reasons is our cvs are usually packed with
a ton of interesting jobs i've had clients who are professional magicians dancers cam
girls coaches athletes painters executives just about anything some of them have done just about
all those things in one lifetime one of the reasons this happens is shiny object syndrome
perhaps you've heard of the ten thousand hour rule basically it says that to develop a tremendous
amount of success in an area you must spend at least 10 000 hours there in other words investing
time in the same direction for an extended period of time leads most people to be successful but one
part of shiny object syndrome can be that the more we do something the less enjoyable it becomes to
us and something new appears much more exciting simply because it is new to us and if you think
about areas around wealth building and career success and how many of these require long-term
consistent focus you can imagine the effect shiny object syndrome can have on our lives
well there isn't a perfect solution to this because it is part of our natural wiring but
one of the things you can do is consider an idea before you jump into it if you think i would love
to move to this country or start this new career write it down or just let it sit in the back of
your brain wait for a week and see how you feel about it then if it's still exciting and worth it
start to take some action to make it happen one of the reasons i love being an enfp is i make [ __ ]
happen i ask my enfp clients what is a long time three months is the longest i think i have ever
heard because we want things to happen now we live in the present and we like action we like movement
this is awesome right this is a strength this is a skill you bring a force to your team
but there's a bit of a problem some might say we have a very distorted perception of time and the
problem is that some things in life take quite a while to develop and if we always expect things to
happen quickly and then they don't happen at the same pace we expect we get annoyed and then we
feel frustrated but instead of acknowledging this frustration what we often do is say hey i found a
new plan i found something else i could do i found something better and we jumped to that what we're
really doing here is quitting because we got a little annoyed or frustrated because something
took a lot longer than we expected so what is the solution to this distorted perception of time
so i was getting my motorcycle license and i went to this really cool school in vancouver
canada where i grew up and they had brought in navy seals to train them basically about
kind of the mindset they also do training around racing motorcycles and so what's
the mindset how do you think how do you be a great driver and one of the things that
they taught them is this navy seal saying which is slow is smooth and smooth as fast
what this means is when you're patient when you slow down and think about the longer term
and give yourself enough time to succeed you're going to achieve something big on the flip side
when you rush when you try to always be busy and get so much done it doesn't work imagine you're
an enfp trying to have your own business you're not quite where you want to be so you change to
the next thing and work work work and change and then work work and change and then a year goes by
and you look back and technically you've been very fast you've been very busy for this whole year but
you've actually really accomplished nothing so you were fast in the short term
but actually slow in the long term this is why slow is smooth and smooth is fast
here's another problem that can happen with us enfps is we're aware of some of these tendencies
we become aware that we don't finish things and it's a bit of a life pattern so we say
you know what i'm going to change this so we start something new we're excited when we start out and
as things get harder and we would normally quit we say no i'm going to force this i'm
going to make it happen one of the problems is you're ultimately going to be draining yourself
so maybe you can force yourself to be really organized get accountable
follow through on everything on time to live in spreadsheets and project management software
but i'm telling you from clients i've worked with around the world this is the recipe for burnout
the ultimate solution is about aligning how you achieve your goals how you complete your projects
with your natural strength and personality traits align your projects with you as an enfp so that
you're actually energized and excited by the work and you'll have no problem staying on track and
getting a tremendous amount done at this point perhaps in another video you've heard me talk
about extroverted intuition this is our enfp superpower number one this is our main function
this is generating ideas seeing possibilities seeing all the different ways you can look at
something all the different perspectives this enables most of our strengths but it also enables
some of our biggest weaknesses we usually lie to ourselves and we really need to watch out for this
you want to do something bad or avoid something good that you're supposed to do our unconscious
is capable of generating as many reasons as possible to make us feel okay with that situation
it can justify just about any behavior we'd like to do and of course this can be fun i'm not saying
to stop it right now maybe give yourself a few more years of fun before you decide to tackle
your unconscious and all those demons but once you want to tackle your demons what i would suggest
doing is one writing things down so it becomes a little more concrete and you can take your
unconscious and all these justifications and put it on paper and two is spending time with someone
who is a lot more direct and strict in terms of how they think about things these can be people
like entjs and intjs for instance who will look at it and say yeah there's better ways to get
focused and human connection than cocaine and strippers every morning and you'll say
i guess that's fair and then maybe you'll change your habits and go join a walking group and have
a coffee in the morning something like that could be a lovely alternative i've touched
on this before enfps we have a need for variety and newness this is part of our human needs this
is how we have a great life and it's why we love meeting new people going to new places taking on
new careers and challenges so if you get a very stable job and you're in maybe a relationship
that's a bit boring and you don't have any hobbies or anything going on but you have a high need for
newness oh you're going to get up to some fun that you're gonna regret later because your
unconscious is like please feed me i need newness i need variety i need challenge i need something
and when i discovered human needs psychology i realized that one of the things i was doing
is creating drama and excitement in my work because it made things more fun so if you're
someone who maybe gets into lots of drama with your relationship or with your work
consider adding some hobbies adding some excitement maybe some travel maybe some
adventure sports even something just that scares you i've joined an improv comedy group recently
doing stand-up comedy as well might be another one for us enfps that could be good
do something that scares you and meets your need for challenge in a healthy way rather than
destroying your career in relationship just for the heck of it really it is amazing to be an enfp
but some of the traits that make life so great can also create challenges and to summarize
if something pops into your head write it down and see if it comes back if it's only pops in
your head one time don't do it slow down and give yourself time to succeed slow is smooth
and smooth is fast don't expect results to happen overnight and when you are committed to something
find ways to finish it using your strengths don't burn yourself out just forcing the action and
making it happen no matter what and remember that our unconscious can make an argument for
anything so if you have a bad habit or maybe a good habit you're trying to avoid doing
don't necessarily trust the reasons you come up with especially if you're feeling tired
or worn down and last but certainly not least is proactively meet your need for newness as enfps we
need excitement we need variety we need fun and if we don't need it in good ways we're going to
meet it in bad ways and then we're going to have a lot of regrets and here's the best thing about all
this if you follow the solutions to some of these challenges created by our enfp personality traits
not only will you have all the good of someone who actually follows through and stays on track
and get things done but you'll have all the good of our natural traits as well which can
make you actually more effective than all those estjs just gradually working through things and
staying on track all the time you can be super focused and work really fast and be impatient
and actually finish and get things done i did it dad's gonna be so proud
now if you've enjoyed this video and you would like to learn more about the enfp personality
type and how you can use your strengths to design an awesome life i offer a free training which you
can get at dreams around the world dot com forward slash enfp training there'll be a card that pops
up with that as well i would encourage you to check out that training i hear very good feedback
from subscribers if you're new here be sure to hit the subscribe button i'd love to see you in the
next videos and in the comments below let me know which of these challenges has been most present in
your life and which of these solutions you're most excited about implementing starting this week i'm
dan johnston this is dreams around the world and my mission here is to help you become the
best version of yourself all while making the most awesome life possible for you and those you love.
you