>>> WE NOW RETURN TO "BULK OF THE PAST" WITH LOOK BACK AT THIS
1962 PERFORMANCE OF "THE BOB RODGERS SHOW."
>> THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
AND WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW. TONIGHT'S SPONSOR IS GREEN
JELL-O. IT'S A VEGETABLE.
[ LAUGHTER ] NOW FOR MY COMEDY MONOLOGUE.
MY UGLY WIFE SHOPS TOO MUCH. ALL RIGHT.
I'D LIKE TO GIVE A WARM WELCOME TO OUR NEXT ACT, A FOLK TRIO
THAT'S BEEN SWEEPING THE NATION WITH THEIR CHART-TOPPING
LULLABIES ABOUT LIFE. PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR
PETER, PAULA AND MURRAY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪♪♪ >> HI, EVERYONE.
DID YOU KNOW THAT OVER THE COURSE OF OUR LIVES WE SPEND
38 DAYS BRUSHING OUR TEETH? >> WE SPENT 48 DAYS MAKING LOVE,
AND THREE FULL YEARS SITTING IN TRAFFIC.
>> WE EACH HAVE ONE LIFE TO LIVE ON THIS EARTH, AND WE MEASURE IT
IN NUMBERS. AND THAT'S WHY WE WROTE THIS
SONG. ♪ I SPENT, ONE, TWO
THREES YEARS CURLING MY HAIR
THAT'S ALREADY CURLY ♪ THREE YEARS THINKING
I LOOK GOOD IN HATS FOUR YEARS STARING
AT MY PENIS IN THE MIRROR ♪ ♪ FIVE LONG YEARS
WAITING FOR YOU I SPENT ONE, TWO
THREE YEARS ♪ ♪ HIDING FROM PEOPLE
I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO THREE YEARS THINKING MAINE
WAS A TOWN IN VERMONT ♪ ♪ FOUR YEARS TRYING
TO HOLD IN MY FARTS IN PUBLIC
FIVE LONG YEARS ♪ ♪ WAITING FOR YOU
>> YOU KNOW, ON THIS MUSICAL TOUR, WE'VE DRIVEN 500 MILES AND
STAYED IN 82 HOTELS. >> I DRIVE OUR FOLK BUS AT 15
MILES PER HOUR ON THE HIGHWAY. AND I'VE GOTTEN 200 PARKING
TICKETS. >> LAST NIGHT I SAW FIVE
SHOOTING STARS, AND I SLEPT WITH A MAN 32 YEARS MY SENIOR.
♪ I'VE SPENT ONE, TWO THREE YEARS WONDERING IF
MY CLOSE FRIENDS HATE ME THREE YEARS PRETENDING♪ ♪ TO BE
FRENCH, BONJOURE FOUR YEARS WITH A GOATEE
THAT SAID I'M A VIRGIN MAGICIAN ♪
♪ FIVE LONG YEARS WAITING FOR YOU
I SPENT $1,000 ON THE CAT THAT SCRATCHED ME ♪
♪ RIGHT IN MY CORNEA $2,000 ON A PONTOON BOAT
THAT LED TO A DIVORCE 3 THOU ON A FINE FOR SHOWING MY
JUNK AT A LITTLE LEAGUE GAME ♪ FIVE THOU DOLLARS
LOOKING FOR MY LAST VIEW ♪ ♪ AND SPENT ONE, TWO YEARS
EATING PIZZA IN THE DARK LIKE THERE WAS A GUN
TO MY HEAD ♪ ♪ THREE YEARS
CHANGING THE DIAPERS OF A KID EMANCIPATED FROM ME
FOUR YEARS PRETENDING ♪ ♪ TO BE SICK WHILE
I WAS IN THE ARMY FIVE LONG YEARS
WAITING FOR YOU ♪ >> OUR GROUP HAS BEEN TOGETHER
TWO DECADES. WE'VE LOST FOUR ADDITIONAL
MEMBERS TO CULTS AND ORTHODOX RELIGIONS.
>> WE'VE SPENT SO MUCH TIME TOGETHER IN THE VAN WE SHARE
EVERYTHING. HAIR BRUSHES, HATS, HEAD LICE.
>> I DATED PETER FOR 12 YEARS. AND I KISSED HER ONCE.
BUT I STILL THINK ABOUT IT EVERY DAY.
>> ME, TOO. >> ME, TOO.
♪ I SPENT EIGHT, NINE TEN YEARS MARRIED TO
THE PERSON I KNOW YOU -- 15 YEARS ♪
♪ TAKING BIRTH CONTROL TO HAVE SEX WITH NO ONE
18 YEARS RAISING A SON THAT DOES STAND-UP ♪
♪ ABOUT MY PAINTING FIVE LONG YEARS
WE'VE SPENT ONE, TWO THREE WEEKS ♪
♪ WEARING A TAMPON I FORGOT I HAD IN THERE
TEN YEARS WITH A DOG THAT TURNED ♪
♪ OUT TO BE A RAT 12 HOURS STANDING
ON A BRIDGE SAYING "DO IT YOU COWARD" ♪
♪ FIVE LONG YEARS WAITING FOR YOU
I SPENT ONE, TWO THREE YEARS HAVING
DINNER WITH MY FAMILY ♪ ♪ 100 DAYS LAUGHING
AND 200 WAITING IN LINE FIVE YEARS
IMAGINING A THREESOME ♪ ♪ WITH MY BAND MATES
FIVE LONG YEARS WAITING FOR
FIVE LONG YEARS ♪ ♪ ALL MY YEARS
WAITING FOR YOU ♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]