What the actual hell, Ames. What am I gonna do?
I can't afford this place on my own right now.
You could get a roommate.
Okay, okay. Hear me out: The Internet.
Hey, thanks for coming.
We're just doing some interviews to see who fits best for the roommate...position.
Yeah, we're gonna ask you some questions, cool?
-Uhhhhh
How often do you clean?
I...I shower.
Tell me about yourself.
I'm really passionate about cats. And vampires.
How about vampire cats?
[ Nods seriously, says nothing ]
I moved here for Uni a few years back so I'm looking for a place to settle in.
[ Dee ]: Rachel, do you know an Officer Smith?
[ Amy ]: The relationship audit for the common law partnership of Deanne Warson and Rachel Mannt will begin?
My visa expires soon, if I didn't get a sponsor I'd be deported!
[ Amy ]: Online videos are huge.
Start up your camera, make a couple videos acting all couple-ish
Bing, bang, boom. You've got your asses covered and I've got blackmail material for life.
[ Dee clears their throat ]
Just kidding about the last part.
[ Rachel ]: I think Dee has a boyfriend.
[ Amy ]: Dee has you. It is rude not to tell your pretend girlfriend about your secret boyfriend, I think.
Amy, Rachel, this is Edmond.
I'm non-binary.
[ a bite of bacon-laced confusion ]
So you're still spreading that nonsense then?
I thought you'd grown up.
[ Mrs. Warson ] We all have things about ourselves that we don't like.
And the rest of us get on with our lives.
Okay, everybody has their stories down, right? Rach?
I just love you so much Deanne.
Okay...Amy?
I'm in love with ass-face here.
That's cute butt face, love.