-Emma Thompson, welcome back. You are awesome.
You are the most fun. You look gorgeous.
Welcome, welcome, welcome. -Thank you so much.
-Thank you for being here. -Oh, I'm so happy to be back.
I can't believe it's been so long.
-It has been a while. -I'm completely exhausted.
-From doing that? -Yeah, just from doing that.
It's literally pathetic.
-I like having you here during this time of year
because you're on every television.
"Love Actually" is playing on every channel, every hour,
and it's so good.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And it's my favorite scene, which I've always told you,
but your scene, the heartbreaking, saddest scene.
You're so awesome and phenomenal.
I'm like, "How do you do that?" That was just --
-Do you want me to do it for you now?
-No, no, no, please don't. No, no, no.
Do you ever watch it? -I don't think it would work.
-Do you ever see it? Do you ever --
-No. -No, you don't watch that. No.
-It was 20 years ago.
-I know, but it's kind of fun to put it on.
You go, "Oh, I remember where we were when we were doing that."
-Not really. -No?
-No, you just say, "Was I being --
I don't think I was very well-paid for that.
And that was that terrible trailer with the loo
that really stank and had that sort of --
These are just the things you remember.
-How many fans have sent you Joni Mitchell CDs?
-I have a separate house for those.
-Just built with all CDs.
Yeah. -Yeah.
-Oh, you know what I really want to ask you about,
is your husband was on the U.K. version of
"Dancing with the Stars."
"Strictly..."
-"Strictly Come Dancing."
-Yes. -Yes.
-And he was great. -I made him do it.
I said, "It's going to be so much fun."
So not fun.
-It's not, huh?
-No, because the training is just unbelievable.
I mean, he was so tired.
He lost all this weight.
I was like, "Oh, God, is he going to survive?"
You know, and then, the worst of it is,
okay, so, you go and do it,
and everyone loves you and you're just the best,
but you absolutely have to keep saying
that you're living your best life.
If you're not living your best life
and it's better than anything,
including the birth of your children
and, you know, anything,
then you're kind of not really living up to it.
And then, when you get thrown off,
it's sort of like being pushed off a moving bus.
So if you know how to roll, it's okay,
but if you don't, like we didn't --
You know, and I'm like,
"But I'm here wearing a sparkly pink jacket.
This can't happen."
And then he just -- He, like, face-planted.
And I'm like, "Okay, get up, get up, get up.
Don't show fear. Don't show fear."
Because this is the moment where they come,
and the dogs tear you.
They tear you. And we went --
-The critics come out. -Oh, my gosh.
-Yes.
-And then we went back and got the whiskey out
and we went around the corner
and bought a packet of cigarettes.
And we were, like, smoking six -- Like, "We're fine.
No, it's fine." -In high school. Oh, my God.
-[ Coughs ]
It was really traumatic.
-I was thinking that you were going to get up on there
and start dancing with him.
Did you -- Were you -- -It didn't occur to me.
No, I would not have done that.
Because it would have been really embarrassing.
-No, it's not -- But your dancing is fantastic.
-Well, that's very kind.
But it would have been inappropriate.
-No, it would have been so cool.
You dancing at the Adele concert was fantastic, by the way.
I don't know if any of y'all saw this,
but when Emma Thompson was at the Adele concert
and you were dancing, they got you on videotape.
Let's just show a little clip of this.
♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ]
-I see you dancing. You've been dancing all night.
Hi.
-I like that one where you...
-Yeah. "Get up, get up," I'm going.
-It's like Mick Jagger. -Oh, my God.
-It was -- I loved that.
-Because all the celebrities were sitting downstairs,
and they were all being -- sort of just sitting there,
being good.
I'm like, "Get up!
We've been in COVID for two years.
We're out."
It's the first time we had all been out.
-Party! Exactly right. -Oh, thank God, we can get out.
-That was fantastic, and everyone loved it.
And they're going to get to see you in a musical.
-Yeah. -Yeah, "Matilda."
Roald Dahl. -Mm-hmm.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Do it perfect. -Thank you.
Let's talk about this.
Because you kind of got your start -- right? --
kind of in musicals.
Didn't you do a musical on the West End?
-I did. I did it for 15 months.
It was a tremendously cheerful musical,
so after nine months, I was clinically depressed,
because, you know, it was...
♪ Doin' the Lambeth walk ♪ ♪ Oy! ♪
♪ Anytime you're Lambeth way ♪
It was that, sort of the Cockney number, you know?
And it was ever so cheerful. So, yes, I was deeply depressed.
-Yeah, you go, "I can't do this. I can't be that happy."
-No, you can't.
Seriously, it's not good for you.
Forced cheeriness for 15 months, eight shows a week.
-Will destroy you. -It would kill anyone.
-It would kill anyone, yeah.
But this was the perfect amount, "Matilda."
-Yeah. -And you got all the kids.
-Yeah. -But look at you.
This is you as Miss Trunchbull.
It doesn't even look like you. [ Cheers and applause ]
Look at you.
Can you make that face? How do you even make that face?
-Mm. Mean.
And were the kids supposed to be afraid of you?
-They were.
Yeah, they were supposed to be afraid of me,
but, of course, I just walked on set,
Oh, "Nanny McPhee, Nanny McPhee!"
I'm like, "No, not Nanny McPhee! Shut up!
I am Trunchbull now! Shush! Be afraid!"
And they were all going... [ Laughs ]
"Oh, you're funny."
And the director's going,
"Will you please stop hugging the children?"
Because I loved them so -- They were so fantastic,
these kids, honestly.
-Yeah, it's going -- They released some dance thing
on TikTok I saw, like, a behind the scenes.
-Oh, my God. Yeah.
-And it is already viral on TikTok.
Every kid is doing this. They're so talented.
-They're just extraordinary.
And they had worked for months
and months and months beforehand.
They're so extraordinary. -I want to show everybody.
Here's a clip. Here's "Matilda," everybody.
-♪ Have you ever smelled anything worse
than that smell of rebellion? ♪
♪ The stench of revolt ♪
♪ The reek of insubordination ♪
♪ A whiff of resistance ♪
♪ The pong of dissent ♪
♪ And I will not stop till you are squashed ♪
♪ Till this rebellion is quashed ♪
♪ Till glorious, sweaty discipline has washed ♪
♪ This sickening stench
awa-a-a-a-y ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-What are you talking about?!
-Oh. Stop it.
-I have never given a clip -- a standing ovation of a clip.
That was amazing!
You can sing. That was unbelievable.
And that was live singing? -Yeah.
And, actually, that last note, my legs were shaking
because I was on top of that 80-foot structure with,
you know, really nothing but a small wire
holding me to the thing.
And I thought, "Oh, please, please don't."
And then I just -- But there was nothing you could do.
-Just hit that note and get out.
-You just hit the note and go for it.
-♪ Ahhhh ♪ -Yeah, "Ahhhh."
-Oh, it's so good.
I also want to talk about, quickly, if you can,
"Good Luck to You, Leo Grande."
-Yes.
-You were phenomenal in this, as well.
And this is a different movie, by the way.
-Very different. -Very different.
This is not for the children. -No. No.
-Not for the kids, this one. -No.
-But, man, you're on every list, award buzz
because you just knocked it out of the park, as always.
But do you want to set up what that movie
is about so people know?
-It's about an ex-religious-education teacher
who's widowed and has been widowed for two years
and who decides to hire a very much younger
28-year-old sex worker because she's never had an orgasm.
-Mm. -Mm-hmm.
-Yep. So totally different movie than "Matilda."
[ Laughter ]
-But you do feel that Trunchbull could do with a sex worker.
Or possibly be one. She might be one.
She might be somebody's idea of absolute bliss.
I can see some very interested faces over there.
-We love having you on the show. Please come back more often.
We love you. Emma Thompson, everybody.
Roald Dahl's "Matilda the Musical,"
is in select theaters this Friday
and on Netflix December 25th.
We'll be right back with Guillermo del Toro.
Stick around. ♪♪