a lot of people have asked me recently how I'm able to make so many friends and
initially I think something humble like I don't really have that many friends
but I really do have an amazing social circle and I'm very grateful for
everyone that would consider me a friend then to honestly answer them I'd simply
say I deserve them now I might sound cocky at first and
even a bit obnoxious but hear me out one of my favorite quotes is by Charlie
Munger to get what you want you have to deserve what you want the world is not
yet a crazy enough place to reward a whole bunch of undeserving people so
what this means simply is that the world is a pretty fair place by the laws of
physics and economics and other natural rules you just have to play by those
rules and if you're little confused don't worry I'm gonna give you a few
examples to help illustrate this point it's called the deserving factor
whatever you have in your life right now you most likely deserve it if where you
want to be in life is different from where you are now you must deserve to be
in a different place so let's move on to example 1 and it is my body
last year I was what you would call skinny fat I was a bit chubby but not
really overweight why because I deserved that body I wasn't educated on how to
eat correctly I wasn't going to the gym enough and I certainly wasn't tracking
any fitness goals now I am in much better shape with a better looking body
and honestly I feel full of energy why because now I actually deserve it see
I've experimented with a keto diet and a vegan diet and a carnivore diet and a
few other meal plans just to find out what works best for my body this year is
also the first year I've been in the gym consistently and I've never missed a
week plus it's actually the first year I hired someone to help me lose weight I
actually lost 20 pounds in 3 months while gaining strength with the help of
Kevin I got serious I put in the work and now I deserve the body that I have
does that make sense if not let's move to example 2 which is money let's say
you want to make a million dollars well following this principle you need to
deserve a million dollars the problem here is the same with getting the body
that you want most people do know what it takes to get the body they want and
they know what they must do to reach their financial goals but the problem is
they don't actually do it simply knowing usual
does not add to your deserving factor doing does add to it though Tony Robbins
might have said it best knowledge is not power its potential power knowledge is
not mastery execution is mastery execution Trump's knowledge every day of
the week for example researching which real
estate deals to invest in will add to your deserving factor just a little bit
but actually investing into those deals will add a heck of a lot more diligently
investing five hundred dollars per month into an IRA and buying boring index
funds will add to your deserving factor and so will tracking your expenses every
week however most people don't do this they spin the money like it grows on
rainbow-colored trees and they rarely bother to invest and when they do they
usually invest in buying random stocks and hoping the price will go up surely
enough they don't deserve to earn a million dollars you want an even better
example what about the people who win the lottery millions and millions of
dollars or one but you know the famous statistic most of them never keep the
money they have for more than two years and why is that it's because they didn't
deserve that money and because of that it left them the same as if you get a
six pack but then you stop going to the gym you will stop deserving what you
have so let's move on to our third and final example friends by following our
examples we can apply the same principle to having friends if you want friends
you must deserve them but what does it take to actually deserve an amazing
friend well I'm gonna give you four simple things you can do to skyrocket
your deserving factor of having friends number one do not judge I have developed
a priceless skill to listen to people and ask them questions without showing
any judgment and you might think this is easy but it's not
most people show certain emotions through their face or body language
however whenever you can remain non-judgmental when someone is telling
you something they will keep talking and as they continue talking especially if
it's about something someone else would speak their opinion on they will start
to trust you more and you know when you see Joe Rogan or tom bill you interview
their guests they never show judgment on who they're interviewing and it shows
with how comfortable the interviewee is tip number two is to be approachable
maybe right now you don't feel comfortable approaching others and you
want friends to just magically come up to you and start talking to you if you
wish for this to happen you yourself must be approachable
this means things like being well-dressed smiling decent and trying
not to look closed off it also means maintaining a reputation
of kindness and openness attempting to be approachable isn't difficult but
rarely do people actually put thought into it
number three is actually putting effort into finding friends the truth is most
of the time others will not come up to you magically and start talking the
truth is you have to put in the work you have to put effort into finding friends
if you don't have any friends right now what does that mean it means that your
friends are currently in the strangers category this means you have to go out
and attempt to approach strangers for them to be recategorize from stranger to
friend and by doing so you increase your deserving factor of having friends
lastly number four friendship skills one thing that helps with putting effort
into finding friends and increasing your friendship deserving factor is to
develop friendship skills just like any other skill building and maintaining
high quality friendships is one that can actually be worked on and developed even
if you're an introvert our bodies see our brains are literally built in a way
that we need friends I have all kinds of tricks so to say for approaching
strangers without having anxiety how to have a conversation when you don't know
what to say and even how to end the conversation politely without
awkwardness which is something I've found a lot of people struggle with and
in the past few years I found that these aren't tricks to make people like you
instead these are tricks to make yourself more confident trick yourself
into lowering your anxiety making yourself more likeable it's not about
tricking other people it's about changing yourself so maybe you are ready
to work on yourself and increase your deserving factor if you'd like some
valuable tools and tricks similar to the ones I've shared in this video I want to
let you in on something I'm starting this week marks the start of an
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I mean specifically you who may be wishing to learn more about dramatically
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I've learned on how to be notably more confident with your social skills and
develop a fascinating social circle of high value and inspiring friends each
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hassle-free thank you guys so much for watching I hope you learned something in
this video and I'll see you soon