shift the shame of porn to leave it behind forever i'm dr trish lee cognitive neuroscientist and sex
addiction recovery coach in this video let's talk about shame how it impacts porn consumption and
leads to porn addiction and then how you can shift out of shame into higher energy fields for real
neurological energy fields so that you can feel better and you can break this loop forever
all right let's break it down so first of all what does shame have to do with porn
consumption or porn addiction we know from the science that shame is a core fundamental emotion
that goes along with porn consumption so for most people who get roped into or hijacked into a porn
habit shame is a fundamental so it could just be shame about sexuality in the first place from
your family your culture your religion it can be shame from an experience that happened to you when
you were young some type of sexual abuse or some experience like bullying or any traumatic there's
low tea or small tea or big t traumas and we know that trauma and dysfunction can really add to
the feeling of shame in childhood and then at the same time you find the screen and you find porn
and it floods your system with dopamine making you feel good taking you away from the shame
that you're feeling because of something that's happening to you so the dichotomy is that sex and
watching sex and masturbating becomes this oasis in the desert of what might be
shame because of sexuality that's a dichotomy or because of other experiences but no matter what
your brain is hijacked by that good feeling and the neural mechanisms behind it
from a very young age and from there on out the seeds of addiction have been planted and they
continue to grow every time you go back into the screen so basically you're trudging these neural
pathways every single time you use them use it or lose it is the is the way that we think about
it so every time you use those neural pathways you are boring them into your brain even more
thus what happens is shame as a core gets rooted and porn and masturbation become the solution
to the shame now it becomes a self-feeding cycle because many times the porn that you're consuming
escalates into uh more dramatic for lack of a better word genres and i you know i talk to people
a lot and what people tell me is that they find themselves moving into new genres that are just
completely amoral to them or immoral and it does not jive with their beliefs many times it's on
the brink of illegal acts or illegal people or illegal genres or those that are unethical and
just do not jive with what they think and see in themselves and that creates a lot of shame too so
how do we break the shame cycle the way to do it is obviously to stay out of the screen
but that can be really really difficult because these neural mechanisms are so
ingrained and they've been used for such a long time so hebb's law says neurons that fire together
wire together so if you keep firing up the neural pathways that lead you into porn keep you in porn
and then keep the shame going it will be very difficult for you to be able to move beyond
shame but now here's the beauty every seven years all the cells in your body regenerate which means
every seven years you're a brand new person so i know seven years might feel like a long time
but the more time and distance you can get from being the person who had to consume those acts
or genres or view those people every minute that passes seven minutes first 17 minutes seven days
seven weeks seven months the more time and space you give between that version of you who needed it
and you needed it because of that inherent shame and pain in the first place and you needed it
because you were constantly using those neural pathways but now when you lose it by not using it
anti-hebbian learning theory that's called now you can become a new version of yourself because
your cells are regenerating and you're you're physically mentally and emotionally becoming
a new person so day by day as you get distance from that person you can feel empathy for the old
version of yourself who needed that you needed that level of arousal to make your brain feel
okay but especially if you work the brain tip strategies that i give you in these videos
you're becoming a new version of yourself with every single action step that you take so when
you learn from me in these videos and you go use the brain tip strategies at the end of the videos
in fact you're rewiring your brain and you're affecting your brain your mind and your body in
a new direction becoming a new version of yourself who no longer needs porn so you can feel empathy
and i've done this in my own life i'll look back at some of the things that i did and i'll go
sister what were you doing or thinking or where were you at i would love to have a conversation
with myself every seven years for all of my life that would be absolutely mind-blowing to see where
i was at even just a decade ago what were you thinking and but i'm compassionate towards that
version of myself i think that girl needed that at that time i made that choice because i felt
like i needed to i wasn't where i am now and i'm sure i will absolutely cringe in 10 years when i
watch these videos and go oh my gosh what were you doing because of the growth in the transformation
that's going to happen for me in the upcoming seven years what an awesome awesome thing
so look back at that version of yourself with empathy even if it was yesterday but the only
way you can do that truly is if you're taking new action steps so watch my videos watch them
all better yet join my program but if you're not in a position to join my program where the plan is
laid out comprehensively unwire rewire hardwire watch the videos on this channel and implement
the action steps because shame starts to dissipate as you can have empathy for your
old version of yourself now here's a cool thing is that then you start to feel empathy for other
people and it connects you to the human race it raises the collective consciousness by
you becoming a new better version of yourself it is a win-win a no-brainer if you will
okay i hope that helps you out and if you're looking for help on the journey please go over
to drishley.com i am here to help you and as always control your brain or to control you