"Oh my God!"
"Did you see that?"
Welcome to Scotland.
The home of malt scotch,
kilts,
and sea monsters?
It's time to get up close and personal
with the Loch Ness monster,
affectionately known as
Nessie.
The Loch Ness Monster
is said to be a giant marine creature
residing in Loch Ness, Scotland.
Reports of Nessie go all the way back
to 565 CE.
But she became an international sensation
in 1934,
when physician Robert Kenneth Wilson
shot this iconic photo.
Reported to be about 2.5 m (8 ft) long,
Nessie is said to resemble
a “dragon or prehistoric monster.”
Rumors even suggest that she’s a plesiosaur,
a marine reptile that went extinct
around 65.5 million years ago.
So if Nessie really is
swimming around the loch,
what kind of animal would we be dealing with?
Well, our bet isn’t on
some sort of prehistoric creature,
but a giant eel.
And if Nessie is a sort of giant eel,
chances are she would be carnivorous.
This means she would consume the fish
native to the lake
and any small invertebrates she could get.
Nessie could chow down on pike,
trout,
sticklebacks,
minnows,
charr,
and other creatures native to the lake.
Maybe, if she were big enough,
she would feed on some unlucky deer
or otters that took a dip in the lake.
But enough about the loch dwellers.
How would the discovery
of the Loch Ness Monster
change human lives?
I mean,
how would we even go about
dealing with something like that?
Well, we don’t have to guess,
because the Scottish government
has an official plan in place.
In 2001,
the Scottish Natural Heritage agency,
now called NatureScot,
prepared a code of practice
if anyone were to find the creature.
Specifically, the document says that
a DNA sample would be taken
from the monster to identify her
once and for all.
Oh no.
Are they going to experiment on poor Nessie?
Thankfully, no.
The code states that
after taking the DNA sample,
Nessie will be released back into the loch.
To sweeten the deal even more,
the document also describes
that the species,
monster or not,
would need to be protected from harm.
This is crucial,
because once it's confirmed
that the Loch Ness Monster exists,
curious searchers would be joined
by hunters and poachers.
We can only imagine
what a taxidermied Nessie
would go for on the black market.
So, how would a protected Nessie
repay the people of Scotland?
Well, the Loch Ness Monster
would undoubtedly become
something a golden goose.
The Loch Ness Monster contributes
almost £41 million ($54.6 million U.S.)
to the Scottish economy every year.
If you could see the monster,
we could expect that figure
to skyrocket.
The tourist industry in Loch Ness
would change dramatically.
Maybe there would be
Loch Ness Monster tours,
just like whale watching tours?
Life’s been pretty good since I opened up
my hotel on Loch Ness.
People come from all over the world,
to see the monster right from their balconies.
Trouble is
Nessie's a bit shy
and some days she doesn't show up
So, to avoid take any chances,
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against inflation, deflation,
and in this case,
the stage fright of a giant sea monster.
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Even without evidence,
the legend of Nessie brings the tourists in,
in droves.
"We are going to see Loch Ness!"
"I've done research."
"And I know where to look for you SUCKA!"
They support hotels,
souvenir shops,
and the local economy as a whole.
With a real Nessie in the loch,
the economy would boom.
The downside of that is,
all that attention
may overwhelm the area.
And more importantly,
it might overwhelm Nessie’s ecosystem.
It’s possible that the area
would need to be restricted
to a certain number of people at a time.
Sort of like a safari,
with humans not interacting
or disturbing the animal.
So, is it possible that
Nessie may really be out there?
Eh,
maybe?
There’s always a chance of discovering
a new species.
I mean, there was a time
when people thought the platypus
and the komodo dragon
were the stuff of legend.
The good news is,
if Nessie is out there,
Scotland has her back.
But this has us thinking.
If Nessie is real,
that means some
other big contenders are too.
Maybe it’s time to look
for the world’s hide and seek champion.
What if Bigfoot was real?
Well, obviously,
that’s a story for another WHAT IF.