Some of the more common questions I answer in my sex therapy sessions are about masturbation:
is it ok to do it? how often?
what techniques?
what is the best way to touch your genitals?, etc.
The taboo of masturbation seems to be still alive and well.
So in this video I'm going to give you 3 key reasons why you absolutely need to touch yourself.
My name is Helena Nista and I'm a sex therapist and a Tantra practitioner.
I make videos about great sex, legendary pleasure, about Tantra and passionate relationships.
So make sure to subscribe to my channel and hit the "Bell" icon to never miss my powerful
tips, techniques and advice.
Some time ago I made a video where I showed and described the contents of my naughty drawer.
And you can check it out here.
Most of the viewers seem to have really enjoyed it but some had a serious problem with it.
I actually made that video in order to inspire others to be more curious and daring in their
self-pleasure practice.
I also wanted to give them a sort of a permission to talk about masturbation more openly, since
it is such a common, natural and enjoyable practice.
In fact, I had a lot of fun showing and describing my pleasure collection, particularly that
I play with some quite unusual items.
But not everybody agreed with me.
Some people argued that masturbation was wrong or that it was only for single or lonely people.
A lot of people still seem to think that partnered sex is somehow a higher level activity than
masturbation.
And they struggle to understand that I recommend self-touch not as a last resort but as a valid
experience for people who also enjoy love-making with their partners.
The reason for this is very simple: masturbation is our most basic form of sexual activity.
The way that we touch ourselves will determine how we make love to others.
If you touch yourself in a way that is quick and efficient, focused on reaching a goal,
that's how you will have sex with your partner.
And if you take your time, engage curiosity and concentrate on deepening the pleasure
and connection, your partnered sexual experiences will be enriched by that as well.
So why do you NEED to self-pleasure?
The better you know your body, your erogenous zones and your pleasure potential, the better
you can guide your partner to pleasure you.
Unfortunately, in modern world most people don't actually know what they want in bed
and hence are unable to ask for it.
We are all different and we all have different needs and desires.
These needs and desires can even change daily, which can be very confusing to our partners,
particularly if even we don't understand them ourselves.
Once we get to know our own bodies intimately, we can support each other in exploring our
sensuality and pleasure.
Because it's much better to give your partner 5 minutes of what they really, really want
than 30 minutes of what you THINK they want.
Our bodies learn pleasure.
And can get better and better at it in the same way that your muscles get stronger and
stronger as you keep going to the gym.
Self-pleasuring is a wonderful way to teach your body how to feel sexual pleasure and
to train and condition yourself for a lifetime of orgasmic bliss and ecstasy.
Masturbation also allows us to overcome limiting beliefs, shame and guilt about our bodies.
Touching yourself slowly, mindfully, giving yourself a loving full-body massage will re-sensitize
your skin and will help you develop a deeper connection with your physical sensations and
your erotic self.
Plus, something that not many people are aware of: nobody can give you an orgasm!
They can only support you in having one but whether you orgasm or not, depends on you
alone: on your level of sensitivity, on your connection with your own body and any limiting
beliefs in your head that might be inhibiting your orgasmic ability.
Yes, as simple as that!
Pleasure makes us happy, relaxed and content.
Awakening sexual energy and feeling that potent, ecstatic force flowing through our bodies,
charges us, energizes us and nurtures our bodies.
Orgasms cause a huge release of pleasure hormones and neurotransmitters that flood our system,
giving us more satisfaction, confidence and wellbeing.
However, be aware that there are two different ways to orgasm: the explosive one which will
deplete you and the implosive one which will nurture you.
Check out my last video here to learn about those implosive, full-body orgasms.
If you liked this video, please give me a "Like" and also leave me a comment.
I would love to know why YOU masturbate.
I always respond to the comments personally and I can't wait to read yours!
Thank you so much for watching my video and I look forward to seeing you next time!