Hey, did you guys see what Captain Man did yesterday?
Can we focus on algebra?
There was a fire at a pet store, and Captain Man ran inside,
right through flames and saved all the animals.
And he didn't even get hurt.
Captain Man never gets hurt. He's a beast.
You know, someday, when you guys are cleaning my swimming pool 'cause you
failed this algebra test, then flunked out of school,
I hope you remember this moment, 'cause I will.
Hey, here's a cool job I could do, foot model.
You guys, could we go over the list for my birthday party?
- Sure. - No.
No.
But I invited 52 people and nobody's texting me back yet. What does that mean?
That people have been to your parties before?
Oh, come on, my parties aren't that bad.
Christmas, three years ago, 15 kids ended up in the hospital.
- 'Cause of your raw turkey. - It was turkey sushi.
- A boy almost died. - Almost!
Okay. First person who helps me find an after school job gets
this bowl of pine cones.
[gasping]
Why do you even need a job?
You know, to learn responsibility, challenge myself.
- He wants money. - I want money.
Money's good.
Can we please talk about my birthday?
Am I gonna have to slap a boy?
Henry, can you please tell me how in the wor-- Oh, I didn't know Jasper
- and Charlotte were here. - We're studying.
Are we?
Mom, we're right in the middle of some...
- I'm not interrupting. - Okay, thanks.
I just have a question about your underwear.
Mom!
I'd like to hear the question.
What is the issue with Henry's underwear?
Mom! Mom, I'm not okay!
- Piper, we're trying to study here. - I'm talking to my mother!
- What's wrong, baby? - Jessica unfollowed me!
- No one cares! - Henry. Why would Jessica unfollow you?
'Cause she posted a picture of her with me and Allison,
so I posted a comment that said,
- "OMG, you look so gorgeous!" - Well, that's nice.
No! 'Cause Allison thought it meant she looked gorgeous, so she posted a comment
that said, "Thanks, ILY." And so then Jessica got jealous and unfollowed me,
and now I hate myself and I'm gonna die!
- I'll call Jessica's mom and talk to her. - No! That's not okay!
Dang it! All these jobs say I've got to have skills.
- So? You've got tons of skills. - Name one.
- You're a great dancer. - No, I'm not.
You could take lessons.
- Oh, my gosh. - What?
I'm--I'm not great at anything. This is tragic!
- Here, let me see. - I'm just a big pile of average.
- Okay. Here's a job. - Where?
At a store called Junk-N-Stuff.
It says: "Needed, part-time helper for various duties"
Duties.
And see? It says, "No special skills necessary."
That’s me. I’ve got to go get that job!
You get the pine cones.
Sweet.
- Good luck, Hen! - Thanks.
If you give me a pine cone, I'll lick my elbow.
[growling]
What are you looking at?
Uh, nothing. Just, uh, this turtle's butt.
Sorry.
[slurping]
[clearing throat]
Uh, my name is Henry Hart. I'm here about the job.
The job.
[burping]
Um, did that plant burp?
To back.
Come back?
Go back.
- Where? - To the back.
Oh, go to the back
- Take the elevator down. - What floor?
Down.
[squealing]
Uh. You too.