Greetings Gastronauts! This is Keef Cooks, I'm Keef and today I'm going to show you how
to make proper British chips.
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So, I'm talking about chips, as in Fish and Chips, not potato chips, or crisps as we know
them, and certainly not french fries - those are wonderful, but they're a completely different
thing as well. These are akin to the American Home Fries, but infinitely better, of course.
And there's a bonus recipe - I'm going to show you how to make a chip butty as well.
Aren't I good to you? So, chips, perfect chips. Easy to make, let's do it!
OK, ingredients to make chips. You need potatoes, and you need a vessel containing hot oil.
Ideally, a deep-fat fryer, 'cos you can control the temperature really well with that, or
a saucepan about half-full of vegetable oil, and you will need a digital thermometer. Don't
even think about putting them in the oven and baking them. Baked, oven chips are an
abomination unto the potato.
So your spuds need to be floury, not waxy - so you're looking at things like Maris Piper,
King Edwards, Russets - anything that's sold as a baking potato will do the job. So, the
first thing to do is, peel the potatoes. Now we need to cut the potatoes into chips - they
should be about a centimetre square, about half an inch. Now we need to give them a good
rinse under cold water, and that's to get the excess starch off. Some people would also
soak them, but I don't think that's necessary. Now we need to dry them on kitchen paper.
It's not a good idea to put soaking wet chips into hot fat, unless you want to burn your house down.
So I've heated the oil to 130 degrees Celcius, and now I'll lower the chips in, and let them
cook for 5-10 minutes - they should soften, but not brown. And now we drain them and let
them cool down. In fact at this point you can stick it in the fridge for a few hours
if you want to.
So to finish off the chips, I've got the oil heated to 160 degrees Celcius, and I'm just
going to put the half-cooked chips in and let those cook for a few minutes until they
are golden and crispy on the outside. OK, these are looking more or less done - nice
and golden, a bit of caramelisation on the ends and the sides. Just what we want. So,
drain the fat off, and then we can have a go at eating them.
There we go. Some perfect chips, and accompaniments, malt vinegar - Sarson's - and a sprinkling
of salt. OK, bit poncy, sea salt. That's all you need really. Some people smother it in
ketchup or mayonnaise, but some people are weird. So, taste it. Mmm hmmm. Yeah, that's
brilliant, crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside, just a perfect chip.
And to make the chip butty, you need bread. Proper thick white sliced bread. There are
people who use bread rolls - cobs, barms, whatever you call them where you come from,
but I think that's actually carb overload. Yes, there is such a thing. And the other
thing you need is block butter. Not ready-spreadable, certainly not margarine, you want a good thick
layer of butter. When those chips hit that, the butter melts and dribbles down your arm,
and you think that is just a sublime experience.
So, to make the chip butty, you just arrange them side by side in a single layer on the
bread. Room for a little 'un there. And then, lots and lots of malt vinegar, and a generous
sprinkling of salt. Pop the lid on, give it a squeeze, and then cut it on the diagonal.
This is important. Sandwiches always taste better when they're cut on the diagonal. Don't
know why. OK, time for a taste. Oh look, butter's already started to melt. Mmm, gronfff, oh
yeah. Ah, that is unbeatable, absolutely wonderful. Chip butty, ladies and gentlemen. Go for it!
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