Believe it or not but the first thing
that a woman notices when she sees you
is your aura or your energy.
She can tell just by looking at you
a little bit about what kind of person you are.
Because the way you carry yourself,
the way you engage with the people around you,
the way you maneuver
within your surroundings
will give her a pretty good indication
of whether you feel confident
both in the world and in your own skin.
So, how grounded are you within yourself,
she can tell that just by looking at you
and some of the tips
that I can give you about
how to be able to provide
a really great attractive essence
is to work on being confident
and work on being
comfortable within yourself.
And what that can look like in the real world
is actually just going out
into different situations
that you're not used to
and not comfortable with
and practicing getting comfortable.
So, it doesn't even matter where you are
you could go to the grocery store.
If you're not comfortable
going to the grocery store when it's busy
and just practice owning it
in the grocery store.
And getting what you want or not
cowering to someone
who wants to get the cucumber that you want
if it's a guy let's say.
But otherwise go out
and explore different areas of life
where you are normally not engaged in
and just get more comfortable
doing different things
and being in different places.
So, that you get used to handling
different situations
and then it's more comfortable
when you end up in a situation
where there's an attractive woman
that you want to talk to for example
or that she notices you.
So, the first thing is your essence,
your stance, your energy,
your vibe basically.
So, you want to standup straight,
shoulders back and keep your head held high
like you don't be
looking at your feet the whole time.
Because then she's going to wonder
if you're kind of depressed,
if you're hunched over
and you can't make eye contact with anybody.
It's really a sign that
you're either not confident
within yourself or that you
are not happy in the world.
And neither of those things
is attractive to a woman.
And then of course, the second thing that
a woman is going to notice about you
is your physical appearance.
And this includes how fit you are
based on what she can see,
the kind of clothes you're wearing,
how groomed you are
in terms of your hair,
if you brushed your teeth, like all these things.
And I've mentioned some of these things,
actually in another video
about the qualities that
women find attractive.
But she's going to notice these things about you
because she will also whether correctly
or incorrectly gauge just how much
attention you pay in your world.
Like, if you were disheveled
when you're out in the world.
Well, that might uh give her the impression
that you're lazy
or that you just really don't care
about your physical appearance
and for some women
that's going to look like you're lazy
and for some women that might
look like you just don't care.
But if it's that you're just really super
comfortable with yourself and you don’t care
that’s going to come across in a way
that you're handling yourself
and moving and engaging with your environment.
So, she can tell a lot
about you by your behavior
and your physical behavior in the world.
She's going to make assumptions
and judgments about that
not necessarily bad
but she has to
because she wants to try to evaluate
what kind of person you are
when she looks at you.
Women are visual in that
they are evaluating
what kind of character you have
based on what she can see with her eyes.
Whereas men are usually looking
at beauty standards like
how attractive is this woman,
basically ***.
So, women don't think that way,
they don't think about
you know,three steps down the road
is she going to want to have *** with you.
She is evaluating if she even
actually even wants to get
to know you as a person.
So, that's the second thing
is your overall physical appearance.
And then the next thing
she's going to notice about you
is again this kind of goes back to environment
but how you interact with others around you.
So, whether you're
you know, with a group of friends
or if you're by yourself,
she will be watching to see
how you engage with the other person.
Are you confident within yourself?
Are you listening?
Are you checking out other girls?
If you're with a girl.
It could be on a business lunch
and you're you know, still
checking out other girls, which you shouldn't do
just because its disrespectful.
But anyways, she'll evaluate
whether or not you are actively
engaged in a conversation
if you're with a group of people
or if you're kind of just
listening in on the sidelines.
And what does that tell her?
That might tell her if you're shy
or if you're an introvert.
Again, your body language and posture
will reveal a little bit more about whether
you are just an introvert
or if you're actually shy.
Shyness is not attractive,
shyness is a sign of low self-esteem.
And I used to be very, very shy
and yes, I had really low self-esteem
and I got over that.
But I’m still actually an introvert
like I spent a lot of time on my own
when I do go to social events,
which I force myself to
I don't last very long.
I often like to just listen in on conversations
without actually engaging in them.
But I don't shy away from conversation
and if there's something
that I feel strongly about
or that I feel inclined to contribute
to the conversation in some way then I will.
Like, I don't have a hesitation
about contributing to a conversation.
So, those are things that she's going to
watch for when she's actually looking at you.
And then even if you're out on your own,
she will watch to see how you engage
with other people around you
like strangers or like the barista.
For example, if you're at a coffee shop
do you treat that person with respect?
Do you have a conversation with them?
Do you laugh?
Are you humorous?
Are you, you know,
friendly with the people around you?
Or do you kind of stay to yourself?
Again, signs of either
introversion or extroversion
and whether also signs of shyness or confidence.
So, you kind of want to watch for that
in any of these areas
where you are lacking in the skill
you can get better at.
I did, right. Like, I couldn't even
go for a walk down the street
because I was so self-conscious.
I got over that, I actually applied
to do a ted talk,
which I think you're probably familiar with.
they rejected me but I was okay with that.
If they hadn't I would have to
go up and speak in front of people on stage
and that would have gone up to
potentially millions of people.
So, it's not about changing
your core personality
like if you're an introvert that's okay,
I’m an introvert and that's okay.
We have engaging conversations
and we have our own kind of inner world.
We just engage with the world differently
but there's a difference between
shyness and introversion.
So, you definitely if you're an introvert
then you need to build up your confidence muscle.
And if you're an extrovert
and you can actually be an extrovert
and still be shy sometimes
it shows up as sort of over-engaging
or sort of compensating with
the gregariousness or humor or assertiveness
or actually even pushiness,
but that's inappropriate, right.
So, if it comes across as arrogance
then there's actually,
that's actually another sign of insecurity.
Where you're trying to compensate for
not really actually being
that comfortable with yourself
you don't have to be loud
and obnoxious to be an extrovert
and you don't have to be loud
and obnoxious to be confident.
So, the essentially the first things that
she's going to notice about you
are things that you can work on.
You can't change what God gave you
but you can change the clothes you wear,
you can make sure your shirts are ironed,
you can make sure they're clean,
you can make sure you don't smell bad,
you can make sure your teeth are brushed,
you can make sure that your hair is washed.
You can make sure that you're standing up straight,
you can make sure that you're
walking with long strides
and confidence if you're sitting in a group.
And you have room, make space
when a guy sits and kind of
spreads out his legs
that's taking up space that's
very, very alpha quality
and as long as you're not
bumping people out of the way.
Don't be rude about it
and that's kind of obnoxious and arrogant.
But take up space and same thing
when you're standing in one place
kind of stand with you know,
your arms out on your hips
and your feet at least shoulder width apart
because that's like you know superman pose
you're taking up space.
Because you're confident enough
to be in the space and to be seen
you have to be okay with being seen.
And then beyond that the first thing
a woman is actually probably
going to notice is your eyes.
So, if you have,
okay, I'm going to give you a different look, here is.
Right, so different look there right,
I don't want to get too flirty with you
but there's a vibrancy and a connection
that you can make with your eyes
that is very, very attractive.
And doesn't matter how tall you are,
it doesn't matter how rich you are,
it doesn't matter how well hung you are
these are the things that
she's going to notice first.
If you look at her try to make eye contact
and be engaging looking inclusive
and don't stare her down.
I don't believe in unbroken eye contact
to me that feels aggressive.
I don't like it when a guy
just stares without looking away
makes me feel like he's leering.
Leering is not a good thing
make her feel comfortable
because a woman's primary need is to feel safe.
So, you want respect and ***
and women want to feel safe and ***.
So, I hope that helped.
So, those are the three things
so let's go through them again.
So, the three things
that a woman is first going to notice about you
is your energy or your vibe.
And then she's going to notice
how you're actually put together
with your grooming
and your style and your clothing
and how you carry yourself
in your environment.
And the third thing is she's going to
see how you engage with other people around you
and make ***
or *** *** whatever
So, thanks for being here,
thanks for watching,
have a great day.
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