Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier and welcome to Don't Get Caught 2 - now you may be wondering yourself
What exactly are we not getting caught doing? ;)
Well Imagine... actually don't imagine anything because there's no scenario that I can play out that it's- Oh
Your goal is to jack off before the office gets closed. (laughing) You decided to do your shit after work at work
However, there's a problem. You work with your mOM (laughing)
This is Don't Get Caught 2 - I'm pretty sure I've played Don't Get Caught 1. Or I played some kind of game similar to it
If I haven't I'll go back and play this one, but this one's a horror game
You don't have a car yet
So she's waiting for your ass to get the fuck out of that toilet and go with her home. Sometimes, out of annoyance,
She will walk inside the restroom to check where the heck you are. You need to pretend you're not there so she fucks off (laughs again)
All you have to do is turn off the lights using your laptop
You're a goddamn hacker after all and then zip up your pants. When your mom checks the toilet stall, you need to focus on her
(laughs some more)
(while laughing) And then press a button that appears
on screen as fast as possible to prevent getting caught. Use "E" to interact with stuff. Hold A and D (buttons) to look around.
Sometimes your dad's ghost (starts laughing, again)
He doesn't look good,
Will check on you from above so make sure to shine a flashlight, press C from time to time
If you don't do it fast enough, you will get your willy shoved up
your ass (laughing even more)
"DAD!! PLEASE"
*breath*
I don't remember what buttons I'm supposed to press. Something about looking and Q and then jaggin' off..
(even more laughing)
(almost inaudibly) "Press escape if you don't know how to play"
Ah, I don't remember!
(squeakily) "Zip up your pants-" HOW DO I ZIP UP MY PANTS???
OK... oh...
*click*
Okay- (weird growl)... (spooked Mark) ooh...
AH...
Is this made by the same person that made Spaghet? Because it seems awfully similar
Oh... (unzipping sound)
(laughs)
(quietly) oh...
(slappy slappy)
(laughing again )
(still laughing as the slappy sounds continue)
(JUMPSCARE) AHH! OH GOD!
MOM! (laughs) *mom no!*
(still laughing...)
Imma- Imma get banned!
(laughs once again)
Imma get banned! (x2)
Okay, here we- try again! There we go, oh, yeah, that's the good stuff. Oh, there we go. That's what I'm talking about. Oh, yeah
Okay. Oh now we're getting somewhere. Oh *slappy noises play*
Ha ha. Oh, yeah. Oh, there we go. Okay, hang on wait
ZIP!
Hello?
*weird screeching sound*
Hoh...
Dad? (steps of Mom)
Mom?
You there mom? Are you there? I heard footsteps!
(quietly) ah whatever I guess it's safe
*quietly* probably fine..
*another screech*
Whoah..
AH!
*weirder growl from Dad (?)*
Dad??
DAAAAD???
K, I don't know... what's happening- (door opens)
Wh- HEH-HAHAHA-
(JUMPSCARE) EAY!! OH THE BUTTON
I forgot about the button. I didn't know, mom!!!!!
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!
This is a perfectly normal game. *slappy noises play*
Okay, everyone just go ahead and forgive me. Oh, I don't know what's happening here. But here we go *slapping ͡noises play*
*a weird scream in the distance*
ooo
Hello, I guess it was nothing
*slapping continues*
Corn! Corn!
CORN
*extremely quiet footsteps*
Wait, wait, wait wait-
*jumpscare again* AAAAAAAAAAAA
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I thought I heard it!
I'm just not good at zippin' up my FLYYYYY
That's what I'm- D'ohhhhhhhh....
Now we're talking... NOW we're talking...
There's no way to win this game. There's no way... this game is unwinnable
This ga- (step, stomp, step) Whuh!
*JUMPSCARE*
NO, I WAS FOCUSED!
AHHHHHH MOMMMMM
All right, listen guys, I- this is a low point in my channel
*laughing*
Listen, if you could- if you could just not judge me *judges harshly*
for playing number one: playing this game and number two: being bad at this game
just-
You cannot judge me,
and then we can all move on as better people. And by better people and by better people
I mean much worse people. We are all much worse people for
uhhhh
Me playing this game and you watching this game. So no one is free of sin in this video. No one. Not me
Not you.
So if you commit to this now and forgive me
Then we're all in this together and we can all share the burden of the sin. And then we can move on from The Sin
Because there's a lot of sin!
But if we SHARE THE LOAD
Then we'll be OK! Makes sense?
Arright?
Alright? We- (stutter) I need your word on this one. I need absolutely your word. This is- we're in this together now.
We're all in this toilet fappin' away. We're all here...
...unfortunately...
*stutter* Unfortunately.
It's- this video's age-restricted. It's demonetized. It's practically banned already. If you've made it this far...
I- I can't help you, but we can all help each other, makes sense? All right, let's get a big circle jerk goin'.
*some more slappy noises...*
*Mom running*
Dad?
Whoa- Hi.. uh- "T" !
Hi mom! Bye mom!
*jumpscare* AH!
OH WHAT DID I DO???
WHAT DID I DO? WHAT DID I DO, MOM?
I PRESSED THE BUTOOOoooOOOoooOooN!
WHAT DID I DOooOOOOoooO?
I'm just jackin' off in the office ma...
OH- hohOHOhoHOHo! * slapping noises*
*french laugh*
*horrible pronounciation of "Enchanté!"* (means "nice to meet you")
HON HON! OUI OUI! OH HO HO!
*Mark encounters himself* OOOH!!!
Finally!! Now we're talking!
*screech* Oh-oh...
I'll come back to you later
Ok...dad? Ok. Ok
There we are
*mom running*
ooh, dad? Oh, hi, hello
"H"
Hi mom! Just busy doing stu- working! Real hard!
OK, bye mom... *quietly* what the hell..
*Mark finds the weirdest pic yet* Wh- *wheeze* (more slapping noises)
That's all- Dad? OK...
Look I'm not proud of this... I don't think any of us are. My hand is cramping up but that's okay
*zip*
Mom?
Dad? Mom? Dad? Look, I know you're not proud of me right now, but I could be doing worse things
50% there. We're almost 50% done with this. Oh
*mom coming up*
OH, HI! DAD????
DAD??
DAAAD??!!?
Theere we go...
*JUMPSCARE* WHOAA- NOOOOO! I HEARD IT TOO LATE!
NOO- (scream of despair becomes laughter)
God dammit, this is impossible. There's-my hands cramping up, which I guess is analogous for what I'm doing
But also I just feel icky- (stutter) I don't like it- this. I don't like this. I don't like this
I don't wanna- I don't wanna do it. I must have been relatively close cuz I can't see- ugh, whatever. Alright nevermind
Alright, we're gonna forget that it's all icky.
*notices other control scheme*
Oh, good. I'm gonna do- I'm gonna do the other game mode because I can't do the clicking anymore
I'm gonna try- there's another control scheme. Let's see if this will work better
Ok, herewego...
Hey, what? ooh...
That's better!
*Mark grunts*
Ah!
*mark wyd*
Ngeh!
*grunt* Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh...
Nah, we Gucci...
ooo
MOM? (footsteps)
MOOOOOOM?
WHY? WHY?- I WAS FOCUSED RIGHT ON!
MOM!! This game is broken. AHHHHHH
It's bullshit, that's bullshit- were my- my pants was unzipped. Wasn't it? My...
My dick was out wasn't it? My dick was extremely out wasn't it?
*zip*
Ooh.. Mom? HEY, NO!
It's broken! (very fast 8x)
It's broken! And I-
BAHHHHHHHHHH
My pants were zipped. Ok, this is impossible and frankly
I don't want to beat it [( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)] because
The- the idea of beating it is not a state of being that I want to be in
I don't want to be that guy!
I don't wanna be that guy that's fappin' at work...
And we're all worse off for it
Anyway
so I'm gonna, like, I'm gonna get some goddamn common sense...
In this bitch and just end it so we're done here. So thank you everybody so much for watching
Please go wash your eyes out with bleach. Please go scrub your hands until they're raw and bleeding because you need to
WASH.
AWAY.
THE SIN!
There's nothing good here! If you made it to this part of the video, you are damned for all eternity
Just get out! While you can! And we'll all try to be better and forget about this whole incident
Okay, forget this video happened!
NO "thank you for watching!"
Don't "see me in another video" LIKE THIS!
HAVE A GOOD DAY.
BUH-BYE.
*outro music plays*
Outro music: Haunted by Shurk .You can listen to the full song from the 12th link in the description.