Here’s the fairly odd story of Cosmo and Wanda.
We’re two halves of a whole idiot.
A long time ago, 9,985 years to be exact,
Cosmo and Wanda met at the Fair World Diner and it was love at first sight.
But just how did Wanda fall in love with Cosmo?
He had horrible hygiene, lived with his mother,
and not to mention, he was a complete moron.
♪ Yes, I know he’s a moron ♪
♪ With a brain made of boron ♪
♪ And yet, I’m drawn to him magically ♪
But through all of the misadventures and chaos, Cosmo never left Wanda’s side.
Wanna knew from the start that Cosmo was the one.
Guess you could call it magic.
♪ I know that it doesn’t matter ♪
♪ If I can count to two as long as I’m floating with you ♪
But every marriage has its speed bumps,
especially one that lasts thousands of years.
You bet me for a nickel?!
But it was a shiny nickel!
The chaos would only continue when they were assigned
a god kid with a silly pink hat.
In every movie I’ve seen with ancient pyramids and treasures,
as soon as you steal the stuff, a bunch of booby traps go off.
Well, I'm a boob.
And Wanda tapped me into marriage.
Not long after meeting Timmy Turner, the two were getting ready to celebrate
their 9,985th anniversary,
traditionally known as the Styrofoam Anniversary.
I’m outta here!
Oh!
[gasping]
She didn’t remember our anniversary.
Wait. Was it the False Anger Anniversary?
Happy Anniversary, Cosmo.
You mean you remembered?
Of course.
Every fairy knows that the 9,895th anniversary
is the False Anger Anniversary.
Every fairy except Cosmo.
He thinks it’s real anger!
Well, that confusion dug up an old demon from Cosmo's past,
his mother.
She doesn’t even know Cosmo and I have been married 9,895 years!
What does she think he’s been doing for almost ten thousand years?
Did you get the milk, Cosmo?
It seems like you've been gone for ten thousand years.
To make matters worse, she couldn’t stand Wanda.
As long as you weren’t out getting married to that Wanda girl!
Then I still love you.
But Mama, I did get married, to Wanda!
With Cupid’s help,
the two plotted to split Cosmo and Wanda apart.
Hi there! Welcome to the Fairy Dating Game!
Where fairy godparents find the fairies of their fairy dreams!
Our contestant today, prodded by his mother,
is here to see if he’d choose his wife all over again.
If I thought you were mad at me and you really weren't
and I went home to my mother's
and we both ended up on a game show, what would you say?
- Uh, red. - Red.
I would say I was sorry and I would say I’m proud to be your wife,
Wanda, who is your wife.
Ooh! Ooh! Her! Her! I pick her! Whoever she is.
I hope it’s Wanda.
Goodbye, ladies!
Wanda!
I’m sorry I yelled at you, Puddin’.
I promise I won't do it unless you really mess up again.
Like I will tomorrow?
It's a date.
Turns out there was some fairly jealous godparents in Wanda’s past too.
Wanda, my sweet.
I have missed you, as the sun misses the dawn.
Well, that's all very flattering.
But that’s my hand, pal! And guess what?
I don’t need magic to turn it into a fist!
[grunting]
Bunny rabbit.
When I get my wand,
oh ho ho, you are in for it!
[groaning]
Her marriage to Cosmo drove Juandisimo insane.
Hey, Muscles Magoo, look at me!
I’m fancy and my long black hair flows in the wind!
Hey, stop making fun of my outer beauty!
He made several attempts to steal Wanda from him.
Two fairies got a thought in their head that a bet could decide who I’d wed.
While they battled their bout, their big secret got out.
And now both of those morons are dead.
That’s us! Truce?
A very sexy truce?
Run!
A nickel! Mine!
Everyone always wonders how the idiot Cosmo, ended up with Wanda.
But what most ferries don't seem to realize
is that Wanda could be just as clueless as Cosmo.
Do it!
You guys don’t do anything half way, do you?
Nope, we are two halves of a whole idiot.
But despite all of the hijinks, misadventures, and chaos,
Cosmo and Wanda were absolutely perfect for each other.
We should have tried driving years ago.
Yeah, and look how many friends you're making.
However, unbeknownst to them, there was still a missing piece to their family.
Awe, what a cute baby.
Wah!
You’re right, Wanda. This is the cutest one yet!
There hasn’t been a fairy baby born since, well, Cosmo's birth.
Then after I came along,
the Supreme Fairy Council said they never wanted
anything like me to ever happen again.
But that was about to change with one wish from Timmy.
Wish Cosmo and Wanda would have a baby!
Wanda was now expecting… wait, Cosmo’s carrying the baby?
Everybody knows it's the boy fairy that has the baby.
Danny, we really need to have a serious talk about the birds and the Beegees!
Well, this’ll be easy then, right?
Fear not, Cosmo. Dr. Rip Studwell is on the case.
Now, does anyone here know how to deliver a fairy baby?
You mean you don’t know how?!
Timmy, a fair baby hasn't been born in thousands of years.
No one knows how.
I'm a very uncomplexicated person!
Wish it out. Wish it out!
Okay! Okay! I wish our baby was out!
The angelic choir is going to cost you extra.
Oh!
When word got out of a fairy baby, every fair wanted to get their hands on him.
The baby couldn't control his magic yet,
and if he fell into the wrong hands, his power could destroy the universe.
[squealing]
[screaming]
[cheering]
What just happened?
I feel as though all of life’s pressures have been released in a sudden burst!
It's almost as though a giant wind has blown away all our troubles.
Or that little Liza has just cut a magical huge one
and the universe's back to normal!
And, most importantly, our baby is healthy, happy,
and with its family again.
That wraps up Cosmo and Wanda's timeline.
Do you think Cosmo and Wanda are perfect for each other?
Whatever happened to Juandisimo?
Let us know in the comments.
High fin!
[grunting]
How about a kiss instead?
I'm game.
Muah!