since starting the order man YouTube channel and the blog and the podcast I've
got a lot of questions about manhood I've got a lot of questions about what
it means to be a man and I've got a lot of definitions from people who are
chiming in telling me what it means to be a man
I hear answers from the clothes we wear to the cars we drive to the girls that
we date all the way down to the virtues that we as men adhere to and after
talking with hundreds of men and spending a lot of time on what it means
to be a successful man what it means to be a man in today's society I've
narrowed it down to the eight best answers a skill sets that I think every
man needs to develop if he wants to call himself a man in today's society
those eight skill sets the beauty of atom is that you don't need to be an
expert you don't need to be a master I don't have them all figured out you
don't have them all figured out there's no person out there that has also eight
of these figured out but if you work on these things if you work on these eight
skill sets and you're constantly trying to improve which is what I think is a
measure of man somebody who's constantly trying to improve then I believe you
have the right to call yourself a man so let's run through these eight skill sets
that I've identified the very first skill set that I've identified is
relationships now these aren't any particular order but I do believe that
relationships could be arguably the number one skill set that you needed to
develop now it could be a relationship with a higher power it could be a
relationship with your family it could be a relationship with friends and
colleagues but there's no man out there who achieved any levels of success
without some help along the way now I do realize that there are some outliers who
maybe accomplish certain things or have done big things when they've hold
themselves up in a corner but for the most of us 99% of the guys out there
we're going to need some help we're going to need some assistant we're going
to need a team to help us to accomplish the things that we want to do and at
that point it's a matter of how you're able to develop relationships to help
you succeed but then also to help those people in your life succeed and
accomplish what it is that they want to accomplish
now the next skill set is intellect we have to be smart we have to study we
have to continue to learn but skill set this skill set is particularly hard
because it takes time it takes energy it takes humility which I know as a man is
not my strong point but you've got to be humble enough to realize that you don't
know it all I don't know it all but somebody out there does and we can learn
whatever it is we want to learn and it's right in the palm of our hand literally
with our cell phones to be able to access the information that we want
access we cannot use ignorant as an excuse to be mediocre but I think with
guys that happens all the time we didn't know that was going to happen or we
didn't know that is not an excuse you should know and if you want to call
yourself a man you've got to figure it out now the next skill set is leadership
at some point in your life you will be called if you have not already to a
leadership position now it could be leadership in your church it could
leadership in your family it could be leadership in the community it could be
at your job it could be wherever but at some point
you are going to be called upon as a leader and one of the primary functions
of a man is to lead is to lead his family and lead his tribe and so at that
point when you're called upon to be a leader it's really going to come down to
you and what you know how to lead people how do you connect with people and how
you're able to lead them out of a situation into a place that they could
not have imagined going on their own the next skill set is manly skills
now when I say manly skills what comes to mind for me it's being able to change
the rail on a car its shape its sharpening your knife it's throwing a
baseball all of those things but it's more than that being a man and having
this skillset done which is manly skills is about resourcefulness the prime
example that I always use is MacGyver how he could take a match and a
shoestring and get himself out of any situation at some point you will be in a
situation again if you have not already where you will need to look around and
utilize the resources that are available within your reach to help you get out of
a sticky situation or to get you to where you want to be and your measure of
resourcefulness and your ability to be good with manly skills and figure things
out on the fly is going to determine your level of success when it comes to
that for example I do a lot of things around the house three four five six
years ago I would not have been able to figure them out in fact I probably
created more of a mess trying to figure it out than I did trying to fix it or
just leave it alone but I get better and that's what it's all about developing
manly skills chopping wood throwing a baseball changing the oil on your car
doing a tune-up on the truck whatever it may be you need to learn to pick up the
tools to use those tools those are the things that are there to help us be men
now the very next skill set I want to talk about is one that hits close to
home and that is that of money I'm a financial adviser by trade and it's
amazing to me to see how many people do not have their money situation under
control and to be successful to be the man that you can be you've got to
have your money under control you need to know how to pay off debt you need to
be out of debt you need to be saving money you need to be doing all of those
things with your money in your career in your business your finance in your house
in order to be successful we've been given this money whatever level of
wealth you're at right now you were a Stewart over that if you want more
wealth in your life to accomplish accomplish the things you want to
accomplish you've got to be better with your money and as soon as you find out
how to be better with your money more money will start coming into you it's a
natural principle the next skill set is physical fitness this one is tough a
year and a half two years ago I weighed 50 pounds more than what I weigh today
and I was miserable I was out of shape I was lazy I was tired I was whatever I
was a slob and once I started working out once I started eating better
everything changed around not just my physical appearance but my relationships
with my kids my relationship with my wife my love life my business you name
it everything improved when I started to become more physically fit now one of
the primary functions as a man is that of protection and you will not be able
to serve or to live up to that full measure of protection or being able to
provide or protect for your family if you are not physically fit or at least
working on getting more fit and that comes down to eating better eliminating
the sugars exercising and doing all those things that you can you already
know what to do now it's just a matter of taking action and implementing those
things the next skill set is self mastery it's all about the mind whatever
you think is what's going to happen you cannot take out anything out of life
that you already haven't put into life and what I mean by that is that if
you're filling your mind with garbage whether it's pornography or it doesn't
matter what it is if garbage is going into your mind the only result is going
to be garbage but if you want success in your life you've got to have the right
things going into your head you've got to have the right mindset moving forward
so that you can succeed and you can do the things that you want to do now the
very last topic that I want to talk about the skill set is that of style and
fashion and I know a lot of guys me included maybe even just six months ago
would have rolled their eyes if I would have told
you that style and fashion is all about being manly most people don't believe it
is but what real men realize is that they can use their appearance they can
use their style they can use their fashion as a construction worker may use
a hammer to build a house if you can learn to use fashion and style as a tool
to help you get what you want to then you will be able to accomplish more I'll
give you a prime example if you have a guy going in to do an interview and he's
dressed extremely well and he looks professional he looks sharp he is so
much more likelihood of getting that position that he wants now on the other
hand we've all been out we've all seen slobs and we've all seen guys wandering
around in shorts and flip-flops and beat-up shorts and ragged shirts and
what do you think about that person first impression whether it's fair or
not it's legitimate so we've got to use our style and fashion to our advantage
and be able to do the things that we want to do so let's recap real quick the
8 skillsets that I think are absolutely necessary for every man to be the man
that he can become number one is relationships building the relationships
with people in your life that will help you get what you want to accomplish
number two its intellect being smart not using ignorances excuse to live a
mediocre life number three is leadership when you're called upon to be a leader
how are you going to behave number four manly skills are you
resourceful do you know a way your your way around the shop or the tools that
you have number five money can you use money as a tool to help us you help you
accomplish what you want to accomplish number six physical fitness becoming in
better shape getting more fit number seven
self mastered getting the right mindset on and then number eight style and
fashion using clothes using your appearance as another tool for you to
succeed so there you have it guys the eight skill sets that I think every man
needs to be working on again you do not need to be a master but you do need to
be focused on those things you do need to consistently be working on those
things so what I love you for you to do today is if I miss something
or if you agree or if you disagree with what I've said here please leave a
comment in the section below let me know what I missed let me know what you agree
with let me know what else is out there and
what you think it takes to be a man in today's society