even heart want to share his point of view on the issue of monogamy and if you
can remember
he actually got a divorce back in 2004 from almost thurman
after he was accused of cheating on her with their nanny
now he be innately denies that is like no there's no way I never cheated on her
except I ended up marrying the nanny that he was accused of cheating with
Ryan shock use so novel questionable on
it's not worth I'll here's what I observe other
going on or go go go go over yet so you're telling me
you weren't having safer than any you happen to get a divorce
and then you happen to get married to the nanny but you're having sex with her
before
%uh your
people who believes that no one I miss the app has given up already
okay alright so whatever those juicy details are irrelevant what's relevant
is what he had to say about monogamy because that is basically an
ongoing debate among many people of course we want to push
monogamy it's a societal expectation but is that natural
and here's what Ethan Hawke has to say about it people have such a childish
view of monogamy and fidelity
he's cheated so he's bad she she did so she is bad
%uh as opposed to a recognition that our species
is not monogamous okay um
so look at certain not a new idea and we discuss on the show before we need
look 82 really interesting open question but I like the second call back
ok it's look through this I can quote he says my relationship with my present
wife is thrilling to me and I'm committed to it
but neither she nor I know what shape the future will come in
sexual fidelity can't be the whole thing you hang your relationship on
and NEC over really love somebody you
a you want them to grow a you don't give define how that happens they do right
it in so what i got now that is i'm saying look
the whole my relationship and our love for each other
is not predicated on whether we sleep with someone else earner
prayed it's predicated on what I like about you
and the relationship that we have so on other hand I understand people same here
but you're violating that relationship
when you bring someone tell else and I understand both points
here but I I think overall Ethan Hawke is right
okay of course is right I think that its
a very childish and juvenile way to look at your relationship if
say everything is going wrong you don't have respect for one another you
speak to each other and in a negative way all the time for instance and then
as long as you know what if you're sleeping with someone else that are your
your relationship is OK
know there needs to be respect on all levels and the end the reverse is true
if you have a great relationship you long grade in you know
use laugh at each other's jokes you enjoy our conversations you
take care the kids see other and 10 view happens the
sleep with someone else on a given night does that mean
that she secretly hey did you rate and it was all a trick
so all those laps for fake ish you know know it just means this
on that night she was horny asian slut and it's a swell guy and
it doesn't mean she doesn't love you doesnt mean that your relationship is
any worse than it was before now the problem is
in RD also it appears to be in our DNA that we get massively jealous
we get massively Johnson also I look I used to be one of those people who said
like yeah monogamy is a societal expectation it's totally okay
to be with someone that you love nf1 strays once in a while it's not a big
deal it's just sex right
but there are certain changes in your brain when you have sex with someone
else and I think my fear
is that it might start of is just like a fling or Saks
and the dopamine spikes in your brain all the sudden you're like
developing feelings for someone that u initially just wanted to have sex
so we get a little more complicated than that I would love to pretend as if
humans
are you know Evolver smart enough to be like alright I'm gonna go put it in but
then I'm done
know a lot of people get attached and thats problematic yet that see that's
the thing
all this could be resolved you really easily if we didn't catch feelings
right we all catch feelings with jealousy NV
all that stuff its yet and so if sex was just sex
oh yeah of over like yeah of course have added who cares right
if the emotional connection that sucks right but people catch feelings
and then should gets messy alright and so
so it's a tough question man and I look I know there's a whole side that says
no there's no party bus that's when i misses
total societal expectations there's no side oversize naturally Joseph societal
expectations is flat-out
don't believe that I don't believe it I believe there's a side of us
that is wildly polygamous what's up sex all the time for men and women
is also side or worse who wants to you know
raise a child together and you know
its it's all very complicated and who is territorial
yes thinks what I wanted to be my child thats in our DNA that's where
dickish people to go shovel I mean literally we've had this conversation
the push other seaman out the vagina right
you think a him that's like that inter
here inter inter know if they're Regina competition
he is not Outerbridge pedicab listen outside the region ok all other closers
according to Joes
was suffering out her vagina competition I couldn't get jealous because if you
wanted to be your kid not somebody else's kid that's
that's how we're program right so both things are true
that's why life is a mess okay
and that's why sometimes you sleep with the Manny and then
would like to sleep with someone other than the nanny after you marry her
near that's just how it is better