ABOUT THE INVENTION OF COCA-COLA,
AMERICA'S FAVORITE SOFT DRINK.
[giggles]
SO, LIKE, IN THE 1800s,
JOHN PEMBERTON WAS TRYING TO MAKE PATENT MEDICINES.
BASICALLY, THEY WERE FAKE MEDICINES,
AND MOST OF THEM WERE JUST, LIKE, HERBAL WHOSIWHATS.
WHO EVEN CARES?
WE WAS JUST TRYING TO MAKE ANYTHING THAT WOULD SELL.
WE WAS LIKE, I WANT TO MAKE A FAKE MEDICINE
THAT MADE WOMEN THINK THAT THEY'LL NEVER BE NERVOUS
OR HAVE FARTS...
AND MAKE MEN THINK THAT THEY CAN BE SMARTER.
SO HE DECIDED TO USE A NEW INGREDIENT, COCA.
COCA IS FROM A PLANT.
THE SOUTH AMERICANS WOULD CHEW IT,
AND BE LIKE, WE HAD SO MUCH ENERGY,
AND WE WEREN'T EVEN HUNGRY, AND WE HIKED THE WHOLE ANDES.
[laughs] BUT REALLY,
THEY WERE JUST ON COCAINE.
JOHN PEMBERTON WAS LIKE, OH, I SHOULD PUT THIS
INTO MY NEW POTION THAT I'M MAKING.
AND BASICALLY, HE COPIED SOMEONE ELSE'S RECIPE,
CALLED, LIKE, "VIN MARIANI."
HE WAS LIKE, WELL, I HAVE WINE.
I PUT COCA IN THERE, A LITTLE OF THIS KOLA IN.
THE KOLA NUT RELEASED A LITTLE BIT OF CAFFEINE.
AND HE--HE BASICALLY WAS LIKE,
WHAT I GIVE YOU IS WINE WITH COCAINE--
[laughs] CAFFEINE.
THEN, PEOPLE IN ATLANTA WERE LIKE,
NO, NOBODY CAN SELL ALCOHOL BECAUSE OF TEMPERANCE.
HE WAS LIKE, OKAY, WELL, FINE,
I'LL JUST MAKE A TEMPERANCE BEVERAGE.
HE WENT BACK INTO HIS LABORATORY,
AND HE DECIDED TO JUST PUT THE COCA AND THE KOLA TOGETHER,
BUT THEY WERE SUPER BITTER WITHOUT THE WINE,
SO HE ADDED A TON OF SUGAR,
AND THEN, HE MADE IT INTO, LIKE, A DRINK.
YOU KNOW, HE THOUGHT,
OH, WELL, PEOPLE WILL LOVE THIS.
IT WASN'T LIKE HE WAS LIKE, I MADE A SODA, PBBT!
'CAUSE NOBODY EVEN HAD THAT YET.
HE HAD A FRIEND NAMED FRANK...ROBINSON...
[laughs] WHO WAS LIKE, OKAY, WELL,
I'LL HELP YOU TO SELL YOUR, UM, MEDICINE SODA DRINK THINGY.
FIRST OF ALL, YOU SHOULD, UM,
CHANGE THE "K" IN THE "KOLA" TO A "C,"
AND JUST CALL IT WHAT IT IS, "COCA-COLA,"
AND THE TWO "C"s WILL LOOK REALLY NICE NEXT TO EACH OTHER,
AND WHO WOULDN'T LOVE THAT?
SO THEY WOULD JUST ADVERTISE COCA-COLA
AS A MEDICINE FOR YOUR BRAIN.
THEY WOULD SAY IT'S INVIGORATING AND STIMULATING
AND HEALTHY FOR YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM.
USING THE EXOTIC EXTRACT
OF THE COCA AND KOLA NUT...
[laughs] TO MAKE YOU SUPER ALIVE
AND READY TO FACE YOUR DAY.
THE FIRST YEAR... HE ONLY SOLD 25 GALLONS.
- 25,000 OR 25-- - 25 GALLONS...
- OKAY. - IN A YEAR.
HE GAVE IT TO PHARMACIES.
THEY HAD, LIKE, SODA FOUNTAINS AND FUN THINGS,
AND PEOPLE DID LIKE IT, A LOT.
OH, THIS IS, LIKE, A GREAT DRINK.
THEY THOUGHT THAT IT MADE THEM, LIKE, INVIGORATED AND AWARE.
PEOPLE ARE BASICALLY DRINKING LITTLE COCAINE SODA.
[laughs]
ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! I NEED MORE.
I WISH I WAS ALIVE THEN TO DRINK THE COKE--COKE--COCA-COLA.
[laughs]
- [laughs]
- OH!
GOD, I MISSED SO MUCH FROM NOT BEING IN THE OLDEN TIMES.
[laughs]
THE NEXT YEAR, HE SOLD 200 GALLONS A MONTH!
[laughs] THAT'S SO MUCH MORE!
12 MONTHS.
[dog barking]
[short bark]
[dog barking] [gasps]
REGGIE, STOP IT. [short bark]
TWEL-- [short bark]
REGGIE, GOD DAMN IT.
HOLD ON.
OKAY, I GOT HIM.
12 MONTHS OUT OF THE YEAR. HE SOLD 2,000 GALLONS A MONTH.
NO--YES? GOD DAMN IT.
HE'S ON HIS DEATHBED DYING OF STOMACH CANCER,
AND HE'S LIKE, OUT OF ALL OF THE PATENT MEDICINES
THAT I'VE TRIED TO MAKE,
I'VE FINALLY MADE A SUCCESSFUL PATENT MEDICINE,
BUT WHAT HE NEVER KNEW WAS THAT HE ACTUALLY MADE
THE MOST SUCCESSFUL DRINK
THAT HUMANS WILL EVER DRINK, EVER.
GOD, HE WAS SO SUCCESSFUL, AND HE DOESN'T KNOW,
AND HE'LL NEVER KNOW, EVER.
THEY STILL USE COCA LEAVES
IN MODERN-DAY COCA-COLA,
SO DO THE MATH ON THAT ONE.
EVEN IF THEY DON'T HAVE COCAINE IN THEM,
THEY STILL USE THE LEAVES AND THEY TOOK THE COCAINE OUT.
THEY'RE PUTTING IT SOMEWHERE ELSE.
[laughs]