push poll is one of the most stimulating
flirting techniques out there but how
effective is it our brains love
contradiction I mean even the opening
line of this video was a contradiction
posed as a question
strangely enough many women are great at
the push-pull technique without even
trying but because many guys come off
desperate or even needy it takes some
practice to become even adequate at this
technique so push-pull is defined as
saying something nice and dovetailing it
with something mean or saying something
mean and then dovetailing it with
something nice so in this video I'm
gonna teach you how to show interest
which is also called the pole and then
how to show this interest which is also
called the push I'll also give you some
examples and explain some expert
opinions on the effectiveness of it many
people think the push-pull technique is
just a style of flirting where you can
just memorize lines but to effectively
attract a girl through interest and then
this interest you must cater to the
style of the girl that you were using it
on which means you must do some research
or already have a good foundation of
attraction which you can learn from
taking my psychology of Attraction
course link in the description push-pull
is a very difficult skill but a very
simple process which can make you lose
the girl entirely so we need think about
using any one of these be sure that it
won't come off as if you're an idiot
think of this style of flirting as
hanging a toy in front of a cat if you
hold the toy in front of the cat they
won't go after it in fact if you lay it
on the ground they won't even look at it
twice but if you dangle it and pull it
back right when they swat at it creating
movement they'll go crazy and want the
toy even more leave a like for my new
kitten so let's move on to ways to show
interest or how to pull in a girl so you
can do it physically you can obviously
compliment her in a physical manner say
something about her hair her smile the
dress that she is wearing something
about how she looks the catch to this is
that it's very surface level but it's
also very easy anyone can compliment
someone based on their physical
appearance the next thing you can pull
in a girl is by talking about the
characteristics that you have noticed
maybe you already did your research and
know that she likes to dance then ask
her for a dance perhaps she's really
good at mixing drinks or is amazing at
decorating cakes so you got to know
something about the characteristics of
her to compliment her on those this is a
deeper level than just physical but you
should probably have met her once or
twice a cool psychological trick is to
mention something that you both like to
do because we automatically like people
who like the things that we like
something I explained in full
my new course maybe she likes to ride
horses say you grew up on a farm and you
loved riding them too the third way to
pull someone in is to mention that maybe
you have seen her before maybe have
heard of her from a friend are you that
girl that won first place in the
marathon are you related to John Doe and
maybe even my friend said you could
paint better than anyone he's ever seen
is this true basically you can pull
someone in by relating to their world
find a connection between you two and
execute on it to go in for the approach
and pull now there are some nonverbal
ways to pull someone in obviously open
body language there are nonverbal cues
to pull a girl in keep your body
language open which means you don't
cross your arms make sure your feet stay
pointed towards her and stay close in
proximity basically give her the
opportunity to approach you number two
is eye contact eye contact is probably
the most important nonverbal cue simply
because one seven second glance is
sometimes the most attractive thing you
can literally do there's a whole bunch
of studies that prove this just look at
her and smile if she looks back hold the
eye contact for just a little bit longer
than when you start to feel awkward and
boom attraction will happen I explain
why and I get more details in my course
but just to keep it short
just remember eye contact is super
important and one more nonverbal pole is
a lesser-known cue is to simply look at
the girl you're trying to flirt with and
make the come here motion with your
hands this is literally pulling her in
an alternative is to look at her and
make a phone out of your hand like
you're saying call me so let's move on
to disinterest you can show disinterest
by pointing out something physical about
the person you're talking to this is
hard because you can offend someone
super easily you know something like
this I think you're cute but it's too
bad that you're not my type high heels I
mean really I would avoid using these
lines but I'll give some examples in a
little bit another way to push her away
is to add a time restraint this is
basically just limiting the time you are
in conversation with her by saying that
you have somewhere else to be say you're
in a good conversation but you have to
interrupt it I told my friends I'd meet
them five minutes ago I have to leave or
something like as fun as it is talking
to you I really need to go switch my
laundry by pulling away from her you
were essentially pushing her away by
committing to an alternative activity
the third way to push someone away is
called restricted request it's basically
asking her to do something by adding a
clause or a string to the gesture I'll
give you my phone number but you have to
promise not to text me right away or
call me a whole bunch
another example is do you want to go to
a concert tomorrow you have to promise
not to embarrass me though I've heard
that you can be pretty wild
the idea is to ask for something but at
a relevant joke or restriction to the
asking that pushes her away also there's
some ways to push someone away using
nonverbal communication one simple way
of pulling away is just to look away
look at something else look over your
shoulder like there's something else
that you're interested in or maybe look
outside or even at someone else and the
second way is closed body language it's
easy to push her away with just your
body language point your toes away from
her and towards the closest exit if
you're in a building cross your arms
like you're upset and maybe even make
the anger microexpression if you missed
my video on it make some space between
the two of you and even grab something
to create a barrier alright so I'm gonna
give you some examples one of them is
that you can hug her and then after you
huggers say okay that's enough while you
physically like push her back a little
bit another example is to say get away
from me I can't have you around you're
way too cute and tempting see that one
actually pushed first and then pulled
the third one can actually be used as a
pickup line if I was into brunettes I'd
be all over you number four is I get the
feeling you spend a lot of time in the
library
number five is something like if if she
starts to cut you off or interrupt you
all you have to do is say did you just
cut me off I'm gonna have to teach you
some manners and the last one is just
telling someone that they blink a lot so
I want to talk about why it might come
off rude many girls will say that this
method is rude and not authentic
according to my own personal survey
reddit comments and many other sources
remember that if you do end up picking
up a girl with this method she might
have a tendency to need attention
because girls who respond well to this
type of flirting enjoy attention
otherwise they wouldn't chase you when
you push them away imagine if someone
did the same to you you're in a business
situation and the guy goes well we think
we can pay you this year but we also
need a new copy machine it happens all
the time not that rude but it's actually
really effective in negotiations but
also how does it make you feel in the
relationship what if a girl did this to
you you're cute you look like my brother
well that's okay you might say but what
if she said my brother also killed three
women and is currently serving life in
prison but you definitely have a smile
see there's a line and if you cross it
you can kiss your chance goodbye instead
of kissing her in a study titled the ups
and downs of dating researchers found
that fluctuations of security in the
early days of a new relationship was
really bad it basically stayed in
individuals who exhibited greater
fluctuations in the repeated
satisfaction ratings were more likely to
be in relationships that eventually
ended and also they had relatively lower
commitment basically you may be able to
get her using manipulation specifically
using the withdraw of affection but you
won't be able to keep them
so I'd say long-term push-pull doesn't
work it doesn't attract the people that
you want to date and it also doesn't
last very long I'd say it's best to keep
this style of flirting as a teasing
method if you want to learn more about
attracting girls and some pick up
methods that are actually really helpful
and lay a foundation of a great
long-term relationship check out my
psychology of Attraction course in the
description we're going to psychology of
attraction calm hope you guys enjoy this
video and learn something thanks for
watching and subscribe for more
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