Create a False Sense of Security - Approach Indirectly
This law of seduction is all about indirection, concealing your intentions from the start
and appearing somewhat distant and uninterested, while at the same time being the center of
her world, entering her mind and thus making her fall for you.
The more she thinks of you, the faster she will fall in love.
For you to be on her mind you need to be absent.
Be absent for too long and you escape her mind completely.
Compare what I just said to the findings of the Pigeon Experiment supervised by Skinner
in the last video.
See if you can connect the dots.
The beauty and true art here, as shown by the Duke de Lauzun, to which we'll get in
a second, is achieving all of this with extreme subtlety.
It's like they don't know it's happening until your seeds have already gotten to full fruition
and even then, when masterfully done, she will believe, it is, but a coincidence, a
sort of accident, that out of all people courting her at all times, some richer than you, some
prettier, she's developed such strong feelings for you.
It is fortune, she might think.
It is "true love", "love at first sight" or some other rationalization on her part.
The story, very quickly, is about the Grande Mademoiselle, Anne Marie Louise d'Orléans
and the Duke de Lauzun, who at the time of their first clash was a mere Marquis.
She had already been admiring him from afar, since she had heard stories of his courage
in battle, saw him gallop on horseback and imagined what his character might be like.
When they first met, the Duke sensed her existing interest in him, which made him want to befriend
her.
She had already given herself away, she was "the right victim".
The following is straight out of the book commenting on the Duke's persona.
"... the thirty-sixyear-old Marquis was a brave soldier with an acid wit.
(something you all can become and develop by the way) He was also an incurable Don Juan.
Although he was short, and certainly not handsome, his impudent manners and his military exploits
made him irresistible to women."
Now, need I say more?
The idea that one will never have success with women based on their own exterior is
one that will never completely die, for the fool who believes he's in desparate need of
looks or riches, preferably both, will always find a strange feeling of comfort in self-pity.
Any action on his part then is not required, since he doesn't possess what he deems vital
and thus success just seems so far out of reach, nigh impossible.
Now, regarding the Marquis, he's a man of little authority, who lacks all resemblance
to adonis and yet he's proven himself through achievement, through admirable qualities that
cannot be bought, to add on top of that, gentlemanly behaviour and a great taste of humor.
We can tell that the Marquis was a lady's man, because he was surrounded by them to
the point where word began to spread.
"The Marquis made romantic conquests with ease."
This is called social proof.
The Marquis must be a high value man of interest, if he's getting all this attention.
Great way to speak through your actions and if need be, create jealousy.
It creates a magnetic field of attraction around you.
Hence, the effect that a man is paid more attention to when he's got a beautiful girlfriend
by his side or even a wedding ring on his finger.
That and because everybody likes a challenge.
Remember the cat-string theory.
So, fast forward, Anne Marie and the Marquis become friends, they're talking about shared
interests as he accompanies her on walks and she loves every minute of it.
The marquis proves he's got more to offer than the Grande Mademoiselle thought at first.
Louis XIV, the sun king, proposes Anne Marie shall marry his brother.
Upon hearing that she is repulsed, how dare they take advantage of her in such a way,
to replace a dead wife, as if she were nothing more, but a consolation prize.
And, here's what the Duke does as she tells him of this affair.
He goes "Well, we are mere servants to the king's wishes.
We have to obey their majesty's every command," or something along those lines, and she storms
off angrily.
That wasn't the response she had hoped for.
And still, the Duke doesn't seem to give any obvious and direct signs of his true feelings
/ intentions for her.
That was in fact a strong sign of rejection and trust me, when the roles are reversed,
when the woman, who's gotten so used to being the one persued and the dismissing of others
on a daily basis, gets rejected...
they get mad.
What was that phrase again about tasting your own medicine?
To make things worse, he stops visiting her, since their friendship seems...
wrong.
She meets him again, hands him a paper, on which she wrote down the man she wants to
marry.
In her absence, the Duke opens the paper and finds the words "C'est vous.", translated
"It's you."
For the rest of the story, you'll just have to buy the book, since this is my interpretation
of the content presented within.
I highly recommend it.
I can't repeat myself all the time about how much value Greene's books offer.
That would be too direct of an approach, if you know what I mean.
See, this book is not only about seducing people in order to have romantic relationships
with them.
In every imaginable scenario you're dealing with human beings, whatever your intentions
are.
I can very well look at this story, read between the lines, make the connections and apply
it seeking out and seducing a new customer at work, achieving a raise, befriending someone
of interest or working my way up the ladder by targeting a manager.
Actually it's a near-perfect comparison.
The back then Marquis was a low-rank compared to the, quote "2nd highest-ranked lady in
France."
It was their marriage that elevated him to the powerful position of Duke de Lauzun.
I just couldn't be bothered to try and pronounce his birth name.
Now, here's the truth for you.
Unless you start analyzing these stories with the detail oriented eagle vision, eyes of
Aristotle himself and start practicing what's applicable over and over again, learning from
your mistakes as you go, constantly improving as you would learning to play chess in order
to participate and win at competitions, a hundred examples will have the exact same
effect as a single one.
An example is simply a story, that will help you remember the lessons that accompany it.
I don't create this content tailoring to the intellectually lazy, which is why I appreciate
the majority of you watching.
And I love the feedback I've been getting saying that one can rewatch my videos and
take a new insight from them every time.
I include various ideas, concepts and touch on relevant topics, or atleast I try to, because
you're not infants anymore, none of you, I've checked the statistics.
You can handle more than one single thought at a time.
I'm saying this, because someone stated they couldn't tell what my point was.
I made over 1'000 points in more than 60 videos.
It's up to you to catch them all - pokemon.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
One important question, going back to the law, is why approach indirectly?
Isn't it better to be clear in your intent, put all your cards on the table?
The answer is as always that it depends on the situation, the setting and most importantly
on the individual you're seducing.
You need to know what way to act.
You get there through practice.
No generic approach exists that works with every single person and besides, even if it
did, you wouldn't want a generic woman, on which such a low-effort approach worked, would
you?
Understand the following and you won't need to worry about the so called friendzone ever
again.
The interaction is always man to woman.
You're not her best friend in the traditional sense.
You build up sexual tension by engaging her as a man, not as an inanimate asexual object,
nor as a featherless biped, but as a man who is not afraid of, but rather is in touch with
his own sexuality.
The game is always on.
The simple difference is that one approach is subtle, whereas the other is blunt.
So, what could happen if you were to take a direct approach?
She recognizes you as a threat, she puts her guard up and is not open to interact with
you.
Especially, when in the case of the Duke you have a certain reputation for being a Don
Juan-type.
You pleasantly prove her negative assumptions of you wrong and add a sense of mysteriousness
to your profile.
You're not an open book.
Where she thought she had you figured out, she now realizes there's much more to you.
Plus, from her perspective, the confusion about your behaviour, taking the indirect
approach, will most likely end up working in your favor.
"If he's such a skilled seducer, why is he not making any advances on me?"
She might think she's not good enough in your eyes and decide to qualify herself to you,
in which case I would applaud you for a job well done.
That is the beauty of seduction.
So many women, yet so few men are capable of it.
You reverse that and the huntress becomes the hunted, while at the very same time, they're
completely unaware of this little play, if you do it right, that is.
Let me finish with a Kierkegaard quote, because I love those.
"I do not approach her, I merely skirt the periphery of her existence ... This is the
first web into which she must be spun."
He paints a very specific, almost dark picture of a spider weaving a web waiting for the
victim's entanglement.
The victim is clueless, the attack is passive.
You lay the trap and let her her walk into it.
Oftentimes, we can look at a phenomenon in nature and see stunning similarities with
the way we humans interact with the world and eachother.
Now, maybe that is just, because we learn by observation, mimique what we see and have
an obsession with metaphors and analogies involving the environment we're in.
Still, with all this talk of traps, victims, attacks and manipulation, keep in mind that,
in this case, as in most cases, both entities got what they wanted.
The Duke and Anne Marie had their needs met.
Wouldn't it have been the most undesirable outcome for her to keep longing for a man,
who as it would turn out, had no interest in her whatsoever?
The man she loved, due to his actions and her willingness to let them happen, would've
rejected her entirely.
I'll leave it up to you to finish this thought, but think about it.
You want to sell something, you create a need for it.
How many times has someone told you that they couldn't live without you or your product
or your service?
If you're as good a salesman or saleswoman as heroin is as good of a drug for the senses,
you're almost getting tired of all the praise.
If you can convince a fulfilled person that they're not happy until you enter their lives,
convincing a sad person of that would be about as difficult as making your own bed.
Speaking against the indirect approach is that it usually takes up more of your time,
than the direct approach.
However, good things supposedly come to those who wait, who have patience and think long-term.
One way you could look at it is quality versus quantity.
Relationships versus one night stands.
Love versus affairs.
I personally think that every man should get "it" out of their system in their 20s and
30s, so you avoid a mid-life crisis in your 40s or strive to become the CEO of a faux-progressive
company solely based on your needs.
My philosophy is "the rake life, then quality LTR."
And you bet I'm not marrying anyone in this corrupt zero-reproductive-rights-for-men system.
That's my opinion today, it might not be tomorrow.
That's called changing your mind.
Either way, I'm happy to hear your view.
Just please keep in mind that this channel is about what is, not what ought to be.
I love romantic ideas and I wish they were true.
Otherwise debating you is like playing chess with a pigeon.
The pigeon knocks over all the pieces, shits on the board and then struts around like it
won the game.
And yes I did borrow that line.
Supposedly Vladimir Putin is the one who said it.
And that is it for this law of seduction.
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