[Music]
what do you want to be when you grow up
you're four years old and you're being
asked this question for the first time
and you have to think very very
carefully because your answer could
potentially predict what daycare and
summer camps you do what parental
approved front groups you'll have what
classes you'll take in high school and
what fun classes you'll take in high
school
what volunteer and extracurricular
activities you'll do and about what
strategically gets placed on your resume
what colleges you'll apply for what
majors and minors you'll pick what
networking events to attend what jobs
you apply for what first job you'll pick
what second job you'll pick what third
job you'll pick and eventually your
career so if all things go perfectly
well little Janie will say I'm gonna be
a doctor and right now standing in front
of you I can proudly and confidently
tell you I am NOT a doctor I have failed
well not only did I fail at becoming a
doctor even become b12 other things I
told everyone I was gonna be when I grow
up so in no particular order here are
some highlights from that list a doctor
an actress a politician well the
President of the United States of
America an engineer a scientist a
historian but specifically one who
studies hieroglyphics or the ancient
pyramids of Egypt a pro soccer player
and a garbage truck driver I had a
chance to try out some of these jobs
when I was only in Middle School I got
to work at the Oak Ridge National
Laboratory and I got to work with real
scientists do incredible research and I
was a little bored I mean no it was a
really big deal to be a part of
something that could change the world
one day
and being exposed to real science when
you're that young it was an incredible
experience it just didn't fulfill me so
one summer I found the inner strength
and courage to beg my parents for a
regular high schooler job they said yes
and I worked at American Eagle
Outfitters I was on fire at American
Eagle I worked the cash register I
worked the dressing rooms I was a denim
expert for if you don't know that's a
big deal and I was more at home at
American Eagle than I was at the lab
even though I was gonna be in the
medical field one day but my heart
experienced something at American Eagle
it picked up on the fact that I like
movement and high energy and talking to
people and making them happy and most
importantly I like to see change happen
right before my eyes
experiences that I didn't necessarily
have working in a lab over the next few
years I started to pick up on these
different qualities of life that made me
happy or unhappy and I realized that I'm
gonna make a horrible doctor one I do
not perform well on time standardized
tests the thought of them gives me
intense anxiety and honestly just
thinking about that right now just made
me a little nauseous too I do not like
to be around sick people
three I do not like competitive
environments other than game nights four
I do like to turn off my brain and
immediately exit work mode the
millisecond I come home and five I do
like having a very regular work-life
schedule I wasn't very confident that I
wanted to do it anymore but I had told
the whole world that I wanted to be a
doctor
I had made every life decision to that
point based on that one goal and now I
just wanted to change my mind people are
gonna look at me differently
I'm gonna look at myself differently I
was giving up only I wasn't I had simply
learned more about myself and that's
okay
changing my mind should be okay I
realized that I shouldn't pick my end
goal and make every decision to get me
there instead I need to figure out what
makes me happy and my goal will follow
me to the end because then there is no
way to look back and think I failed the
only possible thought is I did it I'm
happy and I realized that kids could
benefit from this gift I mean this gift
could give them creativity freedom
self-discovery and self-expression
imagine not asking a child every day
what are you gonna be when you grow up
instead you're giving them the
opportunity to choose their own path now
thank God I realized this in my 20s but
I wish that I had realized it earlier I
realized that my own peers could benefit
from this mentality so I decided to
become a college mentor and I did not
ask students what do you want to do
after graduation instead I asked them
what is your story
what does made you happy until this
point and what makes you happy today so
many of them had never been asked these
questions and I could see joy replace
the stress in their eyes as they're
telling me not what their five-year plan
is but what classes they enjoyed and why
so I started to write down these lists
and these words and phrases and they
would change from session to session and
then I would find job descriptions and
hide the title and we would circle those
phrases and those words that were on our
list and more often than not students
found jobs that they did not even know
existed that much more aligned with
their interests and their personalities
from that point I stopped asking all of
my friends what do you want to do after
graduation I stopped after asking every
kid what do you want to be when you grow
up and I stopped asking every adult at
dinner parties what do you do for work
instead I very casually and
lightheartedly asked hey what's your
story and I watched them stare at me
with confusion that's inevitable but the
confusion turns to contemplation they
speak and I listen so here's my story my
name is Jani and I moved to Memphis
about a year and a half ago I'm not a
doctor but I do improve the health and
wellness of people's lives every day I'm
not an actress but every once in a while
I get to be the center of attention
I am NOT an engineer but I build systems
every day I'm not a politician but I
challenge systems every day I'm not the
President of the United States of
America but I do represent the voice of
my group I'm not a historian but I do
learn the histories oh the people we
serve to figure out what keeps them sick
and prevents them from being healthy and
I'm not a pro soccer player but I work
with my team towards a common vision
and I'm not a garbage truck driver but I
have a vision and I'm going places I
have not failed I did it I'm happy so
don't ask kids what do you want to be
when you grow up
don't ask adults what do you do for work
instead give people the opportunity to
share their stories it might be the
first time anyone has asked I mean has
anyone asked you what's your story
[Applause]