Hey, everyone. Stefan here from projectlife
mastery.com. In this video, I'm
going to talk to you a little bit about
how to overcome video game addiction. Now,
video game addiction is something that
affects a lot of people, especially a lot
of young people. It was something that really
affected my life all throughout high school.
In fact, to give you guys an idea, I used
to spend literally from the moment that
I woke up to the moment that I went to
bed playing video games. I would play it
all day, everyday. I was totally immersed
in it. A lot of days during school where
I've skipped school to go home and play
video games. For me, it was a way to
escape. I think that's ultimately
what I realized that pushed me over the
edge to want to make the change and get
away from it because the reality was, in
my life at the time when I was in high
school, I wasn't a popular kid. I didn't
have very many friends. I was very shy.
I was very insecure. As a result of
that, I would get picked on. I'd
get bullied from time to time. I moved
high schools quite a bit.
Often times, when you're a weak target and
you don't defend yourself, then
people will attack you even more because
they know that you're not going to fight
back. They just see you as a
target to elevate themselves, to elevate
their own status and make themselves
look cool.
For me, I was very unhappy with my
life. I was very depressed and so I used
video games to escape because video
games is a different world. It's a
different universe where you can be
whoever you want to be. You
could start from scratch.
You can create your own persona. You can
become very good at it. You can meet your
needs from significance. You can meet
your needs through connection and meet
friends, and feel like you're
important and unique, and you're somebody.
That's what it was the case
for me because I felt like a nobody in
high school. I was insignificant to
everybody else but online,
because I spent so much time doing it,
I was the best. I remember
certain games that I played where I
literally was the best. I was the
guy that people looked up to.
I'd take out
everybody. I was a part of
different teams and whatnot.
I was very skilled so I felt very confident,
and it's meeting my needs in
totally different ways. I was
living these two different worlds.
There's real life and then there is
this fantasy world of online that didn't
really exist, but it was just an illusion.
It was very detrimental for me, and
it can be very negative to a lot of
people because for me what it was doing,
it was forcing me
to escape the reality, the truth of my
life. Instead of confronting my life,
the problems, and the depression, and the
issues that I had, I didn't face it. I
would just distract myself.
As a result of that, I would become more
antisocial, right? The more time
you play video games ... It's a very antisocial
thing. You're just in front of the computer all day.
It was disconnecting me from real people,
friendships. It was just
also a waste of time when I look at it
as well because I looked at the years
that I spent playing video games in high
school, I looked back and I'm like, "Man,
what do I have to show for that?"
I got nothing to show for that. I spent so much
time ... My high school years is
just a blur.
At the end of your life,
or 10, or 20 years, you're not going to remember
these little video games and these
little adventures and stuff that you
went on that were so cool at the time.
You're not building anything of any
value. I often think, man, if I spent
that time instead of playing video games,
I actually spent it improving my body, or
my emotions, or self-development or
building a business, man, I would
be like worth tens of millions of
dollars today if I had started that
process and the amount of time that I
spent doing that and just replaced it
with self-development. I often
think about that. I can understand
how it's a problem because video game
companies, they're designed to suck you in.
They're set up in a way that all
your needs get met through these video
games, especially online games.
Online games are crazy now. It's like
people date and meet each other and get
married online. It's like all
your needs are being met online, and you
no longer need the real world. In
fact, with
virtual reality, the way it is now and
the way it's going, I'm actually
very concerned about that because
virtual reality ... Imagine a future
where you don't need to live real
life anywhere because you could just
put on a virtual headset, and you can
live however you want to live in this
virtual world, especially the porn
industry now ... I mean, the porn industry is
what built the Internet to where
it is.
I mean, with VR, the porn industry is
going to go to a whole new level. I'm
actually very hesitant with some things
because I know how addictive it can get.
You got to be very careful with that.
With that being said, how do
you overcome video game addiction?
How did I overcome it? Well, to give you guys
an idea, I overcame it when I was 17
years old. As I mentioned, it was like
my life all throughout high school. My
friends played video games. I had online
friends.
Even when I went to school, to
give you guys an idea,
on my breaks and lunch break, I played
video games. In fact, I remember times my parents,
my dad, they would try to ban me from
the computer. When
everybody went to sleep or my parents
went to work, I would sneak home
from school or I would get out of
bed to go downstairs so I could play video
games in the computer that we had. It
was a real big problem. How did I
overcome it?
Well, the way that you change anything
in your life is by making a decision, a
decision to change where you
decide that no more. You're
going to cut this off for good, and
you're going to pursue whatever else
instead.
Often times, in order for us to make
these decisions in your life, you have to
get to a certain point, a point that I
often call emotional threshold. It's that
point where you just get to a point
where there's so much pain associated to
the previous behavior, which is
video games, where you associate so much
pain to that that you finally make a decision
to change your life and get rid of it
for good.
You're no longer going to look back. You're only
going to move forward. For me, to be
honest with you, what sparked that change
when I was 17 years old was a girl.
When I was 17 years old, I was in love
with this girl
who actually I lost my
virginity to when I was 16 years old.
I was totally in love with this girl.
I thought she was the one. She broke
my heart. I was devastated over this. I
was in the position where looking at my
life then, there was girls in school that
I had a crush on, and I just didn't have
any confidence to pursue them. There was
the cool guys that I'd see, the
popular kids. They would always
have girlfriends and then friends and
whatnot. I looked at myself and I was
like, "I don't have any friends." I was
just very depressed,
unhappy. It took me finally looking
in the mirror. Instead of escaping,
and trying to hide, and distract myself, I
looked myself dead in the mirror and I
said, "Never again. This has to change and
it will change right now no matter what."
I looked at the mirror and I made a
decision that I will no longer ever
again in my life settle. I'll no longer
settle for less that I can be.
I'll no longer going to settle for a life
that I'm unhappy with. I'm no longer
going to settle being alone in my life,
not having friends, being insecure, not
having confidence, living this life.
What really pushed me
over the edge when I realized, man, what's
my life going to be like in five years
from now or ten years from now if I
continue down this path? What's
it going to be like? I'm going to be even more
alone, even more isolated, even more
unhappy with myself. The stacking of
that, that pain of facing the truth ... I
believe guys the truth will set you free.
You get to the truth, man, you can change
anything in your life. Most people,
they don't want to face the truth because it
hurts. It doesn't feel good. It feels
uncomfortable because you have to admit
to yourself that you're not enough. You
have to admit to yourself that
you're not happy. If you can get to
the truth, you can confront that pain. That
pain can drive you to make that decision
to change and it did for me. When I
made that decision, I got rid of my
PlayStation at the time.
I got rid of it. I sold it. Got rid
of all my games. I got rid of my TV. I
remember that I didn't get rid of the TV
right away but I just disconnected it.
I was like, "You know what? I'm going to
disconnect my TV." I played online games
on my computer so I played a lot of
Diablo II. I sold my accounts. I got rid of
everything. I made like a hundred
bucks for these years that I spent
building up these accounts and stuff.
I didn't really get much of a return for
it. I made that decision. Then,
often times, if you want to break free of
an addiction,
you got to replace it with an empowering
alternative. For me, what was that
empowering alternative? It was self
-development. It was realizing that I
could change. I was very blessed
because at that time of my life, I got
exposed to Tony Robbins and the whole
self-help industry. I realized that I
could improve myself. I can be who I want
to be. I can be that popular guy in
school. I can be that guy that
could date that beautiful girl.
I could be that person who's
successful one day. The sky is the
limit. I got obsessed with
self-development. I replaced one
addiction for another. My addiction to video
games became my addiction to improve
myself, to change my life.
Specifically because I got hurt by this
girl and I went through a lot of pain
with that, I realize I'm going to make my focus
improving myself and developing
confidence, and social skills, and be able
to date attractive women in my life, and
to get a girlfriend. I got
into that. I replaced all of that
with this pursuit of self-development.
I'm improving my confidence, social skills,
dating skills. I remember at the time I
discovered David DeAngelo. He had a great
eBook called Double Your Dating. I read
this book like 20 times. I kid you not. I
printed out the eBook. I read it again
and again. I made total different
changes. I went out and I started
approaching women.
I went out to nightclubs when I was
19 years old, and facing my fears, and did
public speaking classes, and improv
classes. I read hundreds of books. I do
morning rituals and writing
up my affirmations everyday, and my life
changed.
That was the beginning
foundation of who I am today. I'm now 30
years old and I never looked back. Never
look back, guys. Now, has there been times since
where I've played some video games? Yeah.
I actually have a PS4. I don't
play it much to be honest with you guys. I got
it more so because I enjoy now playing
socially with friends. I have
friends over for example. You could see my
TV back there. We'll play like UFC
or NBA 2K. To be honest with you, I
actually get bored with a lot of video
games today, especially these like ... I used
to love role playing games, but I get
bored of them now because they're just
such a ... It's such a process, man,
to finish a game. The
amount of hours you got to put in is
just insane. There's sometimes where
I'd play like a cellphone
game or something like that. I don't
use it as a distraction.
I don't use it ... I think you
can have video games in your life. I
think if it becomes an addiction,
detrimental to your life, a distraction and
you can't stop, and it's destroying your
life, that can be a very negative thing.
I think having some balance can actually
be good. How do you overcome it, guys? It's
making that decision. It's getting to
that point where you decide that
continuing playing video games is
costing you in your life and it's
creating a lot of pain in your life.
Coming to that truth and that realization
and associating to the consequences of
what this is costing you in your life.
How is playing video games everyday
costing your life? Well, I can tell you
this much. Playing video games everyday
is costing you money. You're spending
money on it, but also you're spending
your time, which is worth a lot of money.
In fact, you're spending time which you
could use to build a business to make more
money to create the life that you really
want. In fact, often times I call your TV
or your video games, electronic
income reducing machine. The
more time you spend doing it, you're
losing money. You're losing the potential
of earning more money. Realizing that
it's costing you money,
you're wasting away valuable time that
you could spend improving yourself, going
adventures, learning,
having intimate relationships
with real human beings. All these
different things are incredibly valuable.
Also, it can link to
depression, and anxiety, stimulation
overload. Realizing the negative
consequences associated to it, getting to
a point where you decide, "You know what?
Never again." You got to make a real
decision. A real decision has to be you
got to get rid of it. You got to get it out
of the house. Sell it. Do whatever you got
to do. Give it to a friend. Give it away.
Get rid of it. Sell your accounts. Close
it down. Get banned. Set up software so
that it disables you from even
using it. Again, you got to
replace it. Replace it with something
else. There's going to be times where you're
going to feel bored, or
stressed, or alone, or depressed and you're
going to want to go to that crux that
you've used in the past which is video
games to escape and to feel good.
You got to have an alternative. The
alternative, you got to make a list. Maybe
the list is I'm going to read. I'm going to watch
a documentary. I'm going to go for a run.
I'm going to go to the gym. I'm going to go fo
a walk.
I'm going to take a bath. I'm going to get on
the rebound or I'm going to watch a YouTube video.
I'm going to do something more empowering
with my time to replace it. Guess
what's going to happen. Now, the time
that you're spending ... There are positive
sustainable things that are going to
make you a better person in the process.
When you look back ... For me, I
look back from 17 years old to 30 years
old today. The time that I spent, I spent
it wisely. I am who I am today
because of the last 13 years of my life
what I've done everyday, the rituals,
the books I've read. That's made me who I
am. I'm excited about what
I'm doing today, what that's going to
lead to another five, or 10, or 20 years
from now.
That's the game changer,
guys. That's how you overcome it.
That's what worked for me. It's got to
come down to that decision, and you
got to start to realize the pain that is
causing it in your life and associate to it,
create the alternative, associate
pleasure to that process and sure enough
you'll develop a new addiction. That new
addiction will set you free and lead you
down the path of a lot more enjoyment,
fulfillment, less distraction. It's going to
force you to go through uncomfortable
emotions that you don't want to face and
confront. By facing it, you're going to
become a better person in the process.
That's my strategy. That's my cure for
overcoming video game addiction. If you
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Make sure that you subscribe for more
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hear what you think. Of course, guys,
if you want to change your life,
check out some of the courses that I
have available to build an online
business. I've got some. Look at the
description below.
Check out my Morning Ritual
Mastery course which will help you
develop rituals in your life and help
you set yourself up to win and improve
yourself long-term.
That's at morningritualmastery.com.
I'll have the links below in the description,
guys. Become addicted to
improving yourself. That's a much better
addiction to replace than video games.
It's going to lead to a much better
life. Thank you guys for watching the
video. I'll see guys in the next one.
Take care.