-Here at "The Tonight Show," we love songs,
and we especially love songs written by our audience members
in under an hour.
It's time for "Battle of the Instant Songwriters."
Here we go.
-♪ Something song, and I'm singing a song ♪
♪ And I'm writing a song about another song ♪
-Welcome to "Battle of the Instant Songwriters."
Now, before the show, we went through our audience
and picked out people -- two people --
who said that they were musicians.
[ Laughter ]
We gave them each a made-up song title --
You don't have to be, but you said that you were,
so we'll see if they were.
Now, we gave them an hour to write
an original song based on that title.
Here's a shot of them practicing backstage a minute ago.
Oh, two guitarists.
They're going for it. All right, here we go.
I can't wait to see what they came up with.
Let's meet them right now. Come on over, guys!
Our contestants, welcome. [ Cheers and applause ]
Hello.
Nice to see you. Welcome. Thank you.
Nice to see you. Welcome.
Yeah! Welcome to the show!
Thank you for being here.
-Thank you. -Thank you.
-Let's start with contestant number one.
What is your name, and where are you from?
-My name is Victoria Skie, and I am from New Jersey.
-Yeah! [ Cheers and applause ]
Victoria Skie -- great name.
What was the -- what was the title of the song
that you were given?
-The title was "I Still Don't Understand NFTs."
-Ah. [ Laughter ]
That's very -- That's very good. I like that.
I can't wait to hear this song, yeah.
I'm just figuring it out myself.
What instrument will you be playing?
The guitar? -Guitar.
-Yeah, perfect. All right, go get ready.
And whenever you're set... Get comfortable.
[ Cheers and applause ] Now this is a big deal.
You can scoot over here, if you'd like.
Yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen, here to perform the world premiere
of the soon-to-be classic, "I Still Don't Understand NFTs,"
it's Victoria Skie!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪
-♪ Since I was a little girl ♪
♪ I've loved to doodle hearts and swirls ♪
♪ And draw my family like ugly sticks ♪
♪ Yeah, they were never any good ♪
♪ Oh, but now we live in a different world ♪
♪ And my uncle old me he thinks I could get rich ♪
♪ Real quick ♪
♪ It's something 'bout crypto ♪
♪ Went over my head ♪
♪ Guess these monkeys ain't jumping on any more beds ♪
♪ Now they're worth a million dollars ♪
♪ Oh, I wish that could be me ♪
♪ But I still don't understand NFTs ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪ Why can't we just screenshot them? ♪
♪♪
♪ What currency even buys them? ♪
♪ I guess they're just untouchable ♪
♪ And something 'bout non-fungible ♪
♪ But I still don't understand NFTs ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Man, that's not bad. That's -- yeah.
Victoria Skie, everybody!
[ Cheers and applause ]
That was incredible. That was phenomenal.
Thank you so much. -Yeah.
-Good luck, buddy. Uh...
[ Laughter ]
Contestant number two, what is your name,
and where are you from, pal?
-My name is Asa Daniels, and I'm from Long Island.
[ Cheers and applause ] -Oh, good man.
We love Long Island. Thanks, Asa Daniels.
Great names.
What -- What title were you given today?
-Sure. They gave me "Batman Spoilers."
[ Laughter ] -Ooh.
Be very careful with this song, yeah, 'cause we don't
want to hear any "Batman" spoilers, but -- you might.
You might. [ Laughter ]
Wow. Have you seen the new "Batman" movie?
-I have not. -There you go.
[ Laughter ]
-I'm guessing. -Perfect.
Yeah, this is a perfect song for you, "Batman Spoilers."
And you're playing the guitar, as well?
-Yeah, that's right. In my band,
I play guitar, and I sing. -I love that, bud.
-Later tonight. -Let's do it.
Let's go for it. Yeah, go get ready.
[ Cheers and applause ]
A very talented audience. Come on over here, pal.
♪♪
And I just want to remind everyone,
he has not seen the new "Batman" movie.
[ Laughter ]
Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for the world premiere
of "Batman Spoilers," by Asa Daniels!
[ Cheers and applause ]
-♪ It's Wednesday night ♪
♪ I'm just hanging with my friends ♪
♪ Someone says, "Let's go and see 'Batman'" ♪
♪ Maybe they'll have cameos ♪
♪ From all the past movies like ♪
♪ Bale and Keaton and my boy George Clooney ♪
♪ I've got some spoilers of my own to tell ♪
♪ Joker joined the Girl Scouts ♪
♪ And he's got some cookies to sell ♪
♪ Alfred plays kickball with Commissioner Gordon ♪
♪ And I heard it's now a musical ♪
♪ And it's starring James Corden ♪
♪ Catwoman blows all of her money ♪
♪ Buying cans of Fancy Feast ♪
♪ Riddler's riddles are just Wordle ♪
♪ And he breaks up Batman's streak ♪
♪ Bruce Wayne is rich and famous ♪
♪ He's got a lot of gadgets ♪
♪ Sounds like he's just Elon Musk ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Wow! That's fantastic!
[ Laughs ] Batman is Elon Musk!
[ Laughs ]
Not bad. That was awesome!
Oh, my gosh. Fantastic.
Give it up once again. Asa Daniels, right there.
[ Cheers and applause ] Asa Daniels.
And now it is time to see who won,
so we're gonna let our great audience decide the winner.
Was it Victoria Skie?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Or was it Asa Daniels?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Victoria Skie is the winner, ladies and gentlemen!
[ Ding! ]
♪♪
Victoria, you are going home with $1,000 in an envelope
and a notebook --
a "Tonight Show" notebook so you can write more songs.
-Thank you so much. -You were very talented.
Thank you so much. -Thank you.
-Hey. [ Laughter ]
-Now, no one goes home empty-handed.
You will also be going home with $1,000
and a "Tonight Show" notebook. [ Cheers and applause ]
-Thank you very much. -Both of you guys.
Give it up for your two new
instant songwriters, right there!
Very talented. Funny. It was awesome.
Thank you so much.