Bummed out servers, fishy fish specials and bathrooms so dirty
you can't even be in the building. If you want to have a pleasant night out,
here are 12 restaurant red flags that you should never ignore.
To be perfectly clear, when we say we expect a restaurant's servers to be knowledgeable
of the menu, we're not saying they need to be as well-versed as a preacher with the Bible.
"Hello, welcome to Tom's Bistro. Today we have spaghetti, linguini,
fettuccine, ravioli, rigatoni, bucatini, lasagna."
Still, we think it's rather obvious why servers, waiters, and waitresses need to be at least
moderately familiar with the menu items offered by their employer. According to Chef Works, if a
server exhibits an in-depth knowledge of the menu, it helps demonstrate that restaurant's commitment
to quality and customer satisfaction. But if a server can't answer a simple question about
the menu, why should the customer trust any other area of the restaurant to deliver on its promise?
A good rule of thumb when choosing an expert in some manner is the more they do, the less
likely they are to be great at any one thing — like restaurants with monumentally long menus.
While long-time conventional wisdom often suggested consumers wanted more choices
from restaurants, according to the Washington Post, that seemed to have changed during the
2010s. For one thing, an enormous number of menu options seemed to bog down many
restaurants' efficiency levels, leading to longer wait times for customers. But
as McDonald's chief operating officer Tim Fenton told the Washington Post in 2014, the
best strategy for efficiency of service focused on having better execution on fewer products.
Frankly, a smaller menu helps simplify things for employees, as Denny's chief
brand officer John Dillon told CNN in 2020. So, if you're eager to ensure you'll get
quality food prepared in a timely manner, avoid those restaurants with far too many choices.
We'd be willing to bet very few scents are more universally known than fish — for better or worse.
Frankly, even fans of aquatic-based proteins may find seafood's briny smell off-putting and
oppressive to their senses, particularly when it trends towards the overwhelming,
ammonia-like territory of rotting fish. Of course, fresh fish is sort of bizarre in the sense that it
shouldn't smell particularly, well, fishy. So if the first thing you notice when entering a
seafood-based restaurant is the smell of fish, you may want to hightail it out of there.
Now, the smell of fish at a restaurant doesn't mean every piece of seafood is inedible or unsafe
for consumption. But, as noted on Quora, when the scent is overwhelmingly fishy, there's a
decent chance the seafood in question has taken a turn for the worse. If you detect anything
even slightly off about the odor, follow that red flag's caution, and choose another establishment.
There may be no better indication of a business or company's general structure than the morale
of its employees. We don't mean that a company's employees should be overly joyful or energetic
at all times. But if a restaurant's staff appears outwardly bored or unhappy from
the moment you enter a restaurant, it may not be worth your time or money.
Now, in recent years, according to CNN, a number of food service
workers' displeasure may be attributed to lingering staff shortages and unreasonably
rude customers post-COVID-19. But even before the coronavirus changed the world in 2020,
the sight of displeased restaurant staff was often a red flag for general restaurant dysfunction.
Perhaps a restaurant's management displays a general lack of concern for its staff and
their lives which, in turn, leads to unhappy staff and a subpar experience for the customer.
"What do you recommend?"
"I recommend that you order some food."
We certainly understand restaurant staff are human beings just like the rest of us,
and won't always be thrilled to be at work. But if you notice a
restaurant's employees displaying clear signs of unhappiness, don't waste your time or money.
Considering many of us are eager to find hidden gems in the world, an empty restaurant may prompt
a person to give a less-patronized spot a shot. And, to be sure, there's a number of
potential reasons why a restaurant may appear empty to the outside eye, but is in fact doing
just fine business-wise. Still, when you're looking for a place to dine outside of home,
it may be best to hone in on a restaurant where actual customers are seen enjoying their meals.
Again, we're not trying to say an empty restaurant will be empty solely because it provides a
substandard dining experience to customers. After all, according to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette,
a seemingly unpopulated restaurant may do more takeout than in-person business,
or may simply be busy at different times of the day or week than when you visit.
Yet, we can't shake the feeling that if there's no one patronizing a restaurant
you're considering eating at, there's a chance something's amiss inside.
Like any business based on customer sales,
a restaurant may embellish at times when it comes to its offerings.
"You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee!"
Along those same lines, a restaurant may stretch the truth on occasion when it comes
to the source of its menu items. And while many of these instances are essentially harmless,
some stand out as red flags, like a restaurant that features a fresh
caught daily fish special — despite having no body of water within a two-hour drive.
Now, some on Quora believe there's little reason to trust the accuracy of a restaurant's so-called
fresh-caught fish special unless you can actually see water. We wouldn't go so far
as to say you need to be literally dockside to trust your fish was caught that same day,
but there's no doubt an advertised 'fresh catch of the day' from a severely landlocked restaurant is
sketchy, and the issue is more about quality than safety. After all, previously-frozen fish isn't
inherently dangerous for consumption, but it can become unbearably mushy if not properly handled.
While we don't expect absolute perfection from a restaurant, is it really expecting a lot for the
building to be fairly clean and well-maintained for the customer's benefit? After all,
if we wanted to eat in an unkempt area, we could simply stay home and cook. Frankly,
then, if the exterior of a restaurant is filthy, or there's dirt, grease,
or food crumbs scattered around the inside? Don't give it your business.
There are several tell-tale signs that a restaurant may be far too filthy for you to
visit. According to Medical News, this includes an excess amount of trash or garbage outside,
a potentially overbearing stench of mildew inside, or sticky tables.
We recognize the immensely long list of areas and items to clean
at a restaurant can be daunting, but if you can't stand the heat,
you need to get out of the kitchen. And if a restaurant can't get its act together
enough to remain clean and well-maintained for customers, you shouldn't give it your business.
"Full Disclosure. One booth might have a booger under it. Don't ask me how I know".
"OK that's enough."
"Thank you Tina."
In 2023, we can probably spare you a long-winded explanation about the dangers of germs, bacteria,
and viruses lingering on uncleaned surfaces, there's no doubt we harbor a ton of potentially
harmful microscopic organisms on our hands. So if a restaurant's menus never leave the table,
they aren't likely to be very clean — meaning it may not be worth the health risk to dine there.
According to Today, menus are one of the most germ-ridden items in a restaurant,
largely because of the numerous pairs of hands touching it everyday. Of course,
this becomes particularly problematic with menus that never leave the table. Sure,
restaurant staff are likely supposed to wipe down plastic menus between customers, but the
hectic pace of restaurants means many staff may forgo this step in order to facilitate turnover.
Since restaurant menus can be disgustingly filthy one way or another, it may be worth
the time to find out how often a restaurant's menus are actually cleaned. And while it may
be somewhat unfair to assume a menu that never leaves the table is always too dirty to touch,
we generally prefer to err on the side of caution — at least when it comes to our health.
Have you ever entered a truly repulsive public restroom? We'll assume the answer is yes,
because you're a human being. So if a restaurant's bathroom is absolutely
disgusting, you may be wise to take that red flag at face value.
After all, according to WebMD, a person can become infested with any number of
potentially harmful germs or bacteria in a dirty bathroom. Additionally,
there's just something so incredibly unpleasant about discovering a repugnant,
filth-ridden bathroom at a restaurant — and we're not alone in this assessment, either.
In fact, according to a 2016 Harris Interactive survey, a fairly substantial 3 out of 10 consumers
would never return to a restaurant if the bathrooms weren't clean. Clearly, then,
you can add us to the 'never-return' crowd — and, if you don't want to come across any
unexpected restaurant bathroom discoveries yourself, you should join us there, too.
We fully understand the entire premise of restaurants and food-based businesses are
a natural attraction for pests of all sorts. Still, when you consider the number of health,
safety, and logistical issues presented by a rodent infestation at a restaurant,
if you notice a number of bait stations or rodent
traps in and around a restaurant it'd be best to just stay away.
Of course, the inherent presence of food products at a restaurant means it may be
impossible to completely eliminate the potential for rodents to appear. And in a lot of ways,
the sheer fact a restaurant appears to be taking proactive steps if said
infestation occurs is better than nothing. Additionally, according to Pest Defence LTD,
rodent bait stations aren't dangerous by themselves, meaning there's little
to no reason to be concerned about any sort of cross-contamination between food and poison.
Still, nothing is as gross or off-putting to a potential diner than the thought or
sight of a mouse or bug scurrying around a restaurant floor. So while a pest trap
or bait station by a restaurant doesn't necessarily mean the inside is infested,
we'd advise being safe rather than sorry when noticing that red flag.
If you're at a restaurant, and notice the staff doing a half-assed job when cleaning tables
between customers, it's an immediate red flag — and reason enough to walk away before ordering.
From dirty dishes remaining on an un-bussed table for long periods of time, to staff using the same,
disgusting dishrags to clean every single table, few red flags are more nauseating than a table
that hasn't been thoroughly cleaned. Frankly, we don't need to find a sticky substance on or around
a table we've been seated at to recognize such a restaurant isn't worth dining at.
Honestly, a haphazard table-cleaning style at restaurants has always been a
massive red flag. But in a world that's been rocked to the core by COVID-19,
we wouldn't just advise eating elsewhere if a restaurant doesn't thoroughly clean its tables
between customers — we'd recommend a call to the health department.
While every single one of us likely recognizes we'll have
to wait before we can be seated if we visit a restaurant at certain times,
we also expect a restaurant to treat us with enough respect to be honest about that wait time.
Frankly, our personal displeasure with inaccurate wait times isn't that difficult to fix. In fact,
according to Harvard Business Review, one of the best ways to reduce customer dissatisfaction with
waiting is to overestimate the expected time rather than undersell it. After all, if we get
a table quicker than promised, that's exciting — but waiting longer than predicted is infuriating.
According to TODAY, in a post-COVID-19 world, a continual staff shortage at many restaurants
has led to an increase in the average length a customer needs to wait to be seated. We're not
exactly thrilled at this reality, but we're also reasonable people. So if a
restaurant is willing to be honest about a wait, we're more than happy to be patient.