Hi SD fans, and welcome back. In this video, we are going to be looking at why you should
never be afraid to call a dive. Whether you are a newly qualified diver, or a hardened veteran,
you should never feel you have to do a dive you don’t want to, but sometimes, peer pressure
can make it hard to just say no, even though that is exactly what you should do. I’ll tell you a
useful rule of thumb to avoid any situations. For those here for the first time, my name is
Mark, I am the editor-in-chief of the Scuba Diver media brand,
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I have a little saying – ‘it is better to be on the boat/shore wishing you were on a dive,
than being on a dive wishing you were on the boat/shore’.
We’ve all had those days, where something just doesn’t feel right. You might not be able to put
your finger on it, but it is there niggling away in the back of your mind. And this is when we
absolutely have to be able to say ‘I am not doing this dive’. However, far too often, people
feel unable to do this for a variety of reasons. I started my path into diving via my uncle and his
buddies. Many of them were commercial divers, and all of them were veteran North Sea wreck divers.
However, rather than feel over-awed or intimidated by their collective knowledge, years of experience
or number of dives, I instantly felt welcome and safe in their company. They took my diving
through quite a steep learning curve, but it was all done at my own pace and with no outside
pressure. The major thing which took any weight off my shoulders was that right from day one,
their rule of thumb was that any diver could call off a dive at any time, and crucially, not have
to give a reason or explain why. And I have kept this rule at the core of my diving ever since.
These were proper, hardcore, rufty-tufty divers, and it would have been quite easy
to succumb to peer pressure and feel that I had to do the planned dives to not let them down,
but having had that rule instilled in me from an early age has really helped me down the line,
and I have never felt pressured into doing any dive I didn’t want to do. Even to this day,
after close to 40 years of diving, if I don’t want to do a dive, I won’t. Remember,
you don’t have anything to prove to anyone.
Likewise, I am quick to stress this rule with anyone I am diving with.
I often travel on assignment alone and, while I normally collar an instructor or divemaster to be
my buddy and underwater model, on occasion I just get paired up with another diver onboard. Many
times these divers have been freaked out because they were concerned they were going to ruin my
dive, cut it short, etc, and so I always aim to put their minds at rest as soon as possible.
The best thing with this rule of thumb is that all my dive buddies are made aware of it from
when we first meet. And the ‘not have to give a reason or explain why’ is a vital part of it.
Some people are unwilling to can a dive if they don’t feel they can adequately explain a reason
why they did it, but as I mentioned before, sometimes you can’t put your finger on it,
you just know you do not want to dive. Not having to explain your rationale
relieves a lot of the pressure, but equally, if people do want to talk about it afterwards,
then I am always open to that – but it is always on their terms. For some people,
it is cathartic to get it out there and discussed, it helps them move on from the aborted dive.
It is pretty obvious why you don’t want to succumb to peer pressure. If you are already on-edge
before a dive, then you are asking for trouble underwater. If you are teetering on the brink,
with a heightened level of apprehension, before you hit the water, then if anything
does go awry on the dive, you are going to be in a world of hurt. Minor issues which could be
dealt with in a calm and collected manner can seem insurmountable when you are already over-stressed,
and this spiralling incident pit can suck you in – with potentially fatal consequences.
I think what reinforces how beneficial this rule of thumb regarding calling a dive is,
is that I have seen peer pressure at its worst on dive trips around the world.
I could stand here all day talking about appalling stuff I have seen on dive trips,
but let’s just pull up a couple of examples. I have been on a boat in the Florida Keys
where a young couple were sat very quiet at the back of the boat.
She looked worried, the poor chap looked downright terrified. I casually went over for a chat,
and it was blatantly obvious the lad was in no fit state to go into the water for a dive. His
wife was raring to go, but you could see she was worried about her husband. They were PADI Advanced
Open Water Divers with a couple of hundred dives, so not complete newbies, but for whatever reason,
he was freaked out on this particular day. The conditions were not exactly benign, there was
quite a chop on the surface and some current running, but having overheard his dive group
leader back at the dock really talking up the forthcoming dive – on the wreck of the Duane,
for those interested, which is a cracking dive – it was my belief that the man had just
worked his mind into overload. The dive leader seemed oblivious to the man’s distressed state,
and was loudly talking on the boat about strong currents, your mask being blown off, the usual.
All this was doing was stressing the diver out even more. The dive leader only seemed
to notice the issue when everyone was getting kitted up, but instead of offering support or
talking quietly to the diver, he instead loudly berated him to the rest of the group, telling
him to man up, not be a wimp, and so on. Myself and the divemaster onboard did attempt to step in,
but the diver by now was set to go on the dive to not lose face in front of the other divers.
Sure enough, they hadn’t been below the surface more than a few minutes before him and his wife
appeared back at the ladder. They had not even got below 10m when full-blown panic kicked in and,
thankfully, she managed to slow his ascent back up the line. We got them back on board,
got him dekitted and sat in the front of the boat wrapped in a towel. He still couldn’t explain what
was wrong, just that he didn’t feel right. We assured him he’d done the correct thing, but you
could tell that he was embarrassed and worried about what his buddies would say. Sure enough,
enroute back to the shallow second dive, there were various comments directed at him by the
dive leader and others. Once we were at the reef dive, which was only 7-8m or so, I sat and chatted
to the couple, who seemed visibly more relaxed now we were in calmer conditions. They agreed
to go for a dive with me, and we just took our time, let everyone else get off the boat first,
and then went off for a mooch. We had a nice, relaxed dive, and on returning to the boat,
the male diver looked very happy with himself. I told him he did well to get back on the wagon
straight away – but also said they should maybe look for another dive group.
One of the worst types of peer pressure I have witnessed first-hand is the ‘trust me’ dive. You
know what I am talking about – divers urging others to join them on a dive that might be
beyond their experience or skill level, but who are told it will be fine as they are with them.
Perhaps the most-shocking example of this was in the Bahamas. We were scheduled to do two different
dive sites, a deep swim-through – effectively skirting the edge of the entrance to various
full-on cave systems – for the more-experienced on board, and a shallower reef for the remainder of
the divers. As we left the dock, I could hear one of the open water divers talking to one
of the advanced divers. He was asking about what the swim-through was going to be like.
Next minute, I hear the more-experienced diver saying how he’d take the more-novice with him
on the dive, and that he’d ‘keep an eye on him’. I had a quiet word with the divemaster to alert
him to the situation that was developing, but incredibly, he shrugged it off, said the guy
was his friend and an experienced diver and that it ‘would be fine’ for him to take the new diver.
My Spidey sense was going into overdrive at this point, but there was not much else I could do – I
did try to talk to the new diver, but he didn’t want to hear. Anyway, long story short, but we
all went off on the dive, and all seemed to be going alright. The open water diver looked nice
and comfortable in the water, but that all changed when we hit the swim-through at 40-odd metres.
He seemed to be on the brink of refusing to go in, but then his buddy gestured for him to follow
and shot into the darkness. After a second or two, the diver followed him in. Luckily, they
were the first buddy team behind the divemaster, because about halfway through the swim-through,
the diver went into full-blown panic mode. He bolted for the exit, passed the divemaster,
and was well on his way to rocketing to the surface, if the guide hadn’t managed to grab hold
of his BCD as he charged past. He was in such a state that he ran out of air at about 30m and had
to go on to the dm’s octopus. And where was the ‘trust me’ buddy while all this was going along?
Still poking about in the swim-through. I don’t think he was even aware his buddy had shot off.
And the worst thing – back on the boat, the experienced diver never came near the other diver,
who was in a real state with himself and badly shaken. He never took any responsibility for
his actions. Just an add-on to that story, that divemaster no longer works there anymore after the
owners of the centre learned what had happened. This is the crux of the matter. If the proverbial
hits the fan while you are on the dive, it is you that is going to be dealing with the consequences,
not those who pressured you into going diving in the first place, so only take the plunge on your
terms. My advice? If you get peer pressure to do a dive you are not happy about from your dive buddy,
or your dive group, then I’d suggest you need to look for another buddy or dive centre.
Have you encountered peer pressure on any of your dive trips? Leave your comments below, and if you
have a question, fire away – if we can’t answer, maybe someone in our community will be able to.
Remember, if you enjoyed this video, be sure to subscribe to our YouTube Channel,
and don’t forget you can grab a free digital magazine subscription in the description below.
As always, stay safe – and if you are able to get out and dive, enjoy!