Thank you for being here virtually.
I look forward to the time when you can be back here in person.
I do.
A lot of things I miss about having people
here live in the studio.
I miss being able to walk up to people, and talk to you,
ask you questions.
And I miss playing games with you.
I miss checking the seat cushions for change
after everybody's gone.
One time, I found a bicentennial quarter and a Jolly Rancher.
Anyway, whether you're alive or virtually,
it's nice to hear your screaming with excitement.
And you know, I think it's strange
that people express themselves with screaming
when we're excited.
Because screaming is also what we do
when we're scared or are mad.
And in fact, I saw a headline this week.
It said researchers found that human screams can communicate
six different emotions.
And after I read this, I thought about it.
And I think that I've seen all six types of screams
on my show.
I'll start with the two positive emotions
that screaming can express, which are joy and pleasure.
Different people find joy and pleasure in different things.
Here's the first time I saw someone find this much joy
and pleasure in pots and pans.
And knife.
Hey, everybody, find yourself a partner
who looks at you the way that guy looks at non-stick pans.
He was so happy.
We gave away those pots and pans that day.
Another thing that makes people scream is pain.
Thankfully, people don't scream in pain often on this show.
But one time, it happened.
Here's what happened to tWitch.
Ready?
Are you ready?
Yes.
OK.
I might curse at you.
I'm not going lie to you.
That's all right.
Oh my God.
Oh God.
Oh I'm trying not to bite your hand.
I know.
I can see that.
Oh.
Why does she keep doing that over and over again.
Is that not it?
Oh my God.
What was it?
You can hear people in the audience screaming
with excitement as they watched tWitch scream in pain.
Two different screams going on.
The third emotion screaming expresses fear.
The easy thing for me to do here would
be to show one of the many times Andy has screamed in fear.
But I've picked on him a lot, so I'm not going to do that today.
Instead, I'm going to show Tiffany Haddish screaming
in fear as she protects Andy.
Come on, Haddish.
Momma, no.
Tell me when it's over.
You know, I'm a strong black woman, but if you keep me--
why are you like that?
Andy, I bet you can't wait for the pandemic
to be over, so we can go to haunted houses again.
Oh, yeah, can't wait.
Counting the days.
Yeah.
Is the Stretch Armstrong sitting there looking at you?
Yes.
Yeah, he's sitting there watching you?
With his mini--
Andy's got a baby.
We had a baby over the weekend.
OK, yeah.
Not too many people have jobs like yours, Andy.
Probably a good thing.
All right, the last emotion that screaming can express is anger.
Thankfully, I don't think anyone screamed in anger on the show.
Actually, that's not true.
Sarah Paulson, actually-- maybe because we've
scared her so many times.
Anyway-- That was like all six of the emotions in one clip.