Hey guys, today we're diving into simping.
You've probably heard this
derogatory term thrown around,
but do you really know
what it means?
Well, simping is when a man
goes to extremes to shower a woman
with attention, affection,
or gifts or money.
All in the hopes of winning her attention
or romantic sexual favor.
Key point, not all acts of kindness
or genuine affection and attention
fall under the umbrella of simping.
Simping is all about the self-esteem of the giver
and the intention behind the actions.
I'll give you two ways to know
if you're simping or
simply being masculinely chivalrous,
which is attractive.
Remember, simping never gets the girl,
it only gets the guy
used, abused, abandoned
and usually not liking women very much
and often feeling less worthy.
Simping has been around forever
but has gained more popularity
in the past few years.
So, let's dive in to the nitty gritty
and find out what simping is all about,
how it differs from chivalry,
and why it repels the keepers
and attracts the throwbacks,
users and narcissists.
If you're new to my channel
I help men decode modern women
so you can find, attract, and keep your keeper.
My channel is for you
if you want to have better relationships with women.
Welcome to just the tip.
Okay, so what is simping?
Well, simping is when a guy
goes above and beyond often sacrificing
his own well-being
because deep down inside
he feels he's not good enough.
We're talking about excessive compliments,
extravagant gifts, and an unbalanced focus,
on a woman's every whim.
Now, we'll get into some examples in a minute.
But ultimately
the difference between simping
and chivalry or romantic generosity
is about whether or not
the man feels of equal
or higher value than the woman.
But here's the thing, simping isn't
the way to go if you want healthy relationships
based on mutual respect.
It's also a bad habit to get into online
because key point,
what you do online you take into the real world.
Simping stems from insecurity
and a lack of self-respect.
Genuine connections are built on mutual respect,
love and value.
Simping won't lay the foundation
for a meaningful relationship
and rarely gets you laid.
And while it might seem appealing
to shower a woman you're attracted to
with attention or gifts,
it interferes with building an authentic connection.
Example, the excessive gift giver.
A man spends his entire paycheck
on expensive gifts for a woman he barely knows
hoping to impress her and win her affection.
He showers her with lavish presents
even though she shows little to no interest
or reciprocation.
Have you ever been
an excessive gift giver?
Share your story.
One major reason
why women aren't attracted
to men who simp,
is the lack of authenticity.
Simping comes across as insecure,
insincere, and manipulative.
When a man changes his opinions
to match hers
with the hope or expectation
of making her like him,
it feels fake because it is fake.
Emotionally healthy women
value genuine connections
and when they sense a lack of authenticity,
or insecurity it's a major turn off.
Example, the switch hitter.
A man is interested in a woman
who is passionate about environmental issues,
so he begins to pretend
he shares the same level of passion,
even though he had little interest in it before.
Whenever a topic related to
the environment comes up,
he eagerly agrees with her viewpoints
even if he doesn't fully understand
or believe in them.
Have you ever changed your opinion
to match a woman's
just to get her to try to like you?
Let me know in the comments.
You're not alone moreover,
simping often causes
an imbalance in the power dynamic.
Key point, if you act like you don't deserve her,
she feels like you don't deserve her.
Women mirror your feelings about you,
not your feelings about her.
She hesitates because unconsciously,
she wonders what the heck is wrong with you
to make you less worthy.
What nasty thing do you know about you,
that she doesn't?
Example, the constant admirer.
A man follows an attractive woman
on Instagram who posts sexy provocative photos.
He constantly likes and comments on her beauty
with over the top compliments
and adoration
often using pet names
like babe, babe or baby uh.
He becomes her virtual shadow
always present and ready
to shower her with attention
even if she doesn't reciprocate.
Hint, try to focus compliments
on character not looks.
Key point,
simping gives off the vibe
that a man is not able to self-validate
and instead is overly dependent
on a woman's validation.
Willing to sacrifice his own needs
and boundaries to please her.
Like a little boy
who needs his mommy.
Men need to feel useful and respected,
women need to feel cherished and desired,
but a man's need for her validation,
makes a woman go into mother mode,
and not lover mode and she loses attraction.
Example, it's winky.
They drop everything for her.
A woman he likes mentions she's been wanting
to try a new restaurant in town.
Without hesitation
he cancels his plans with friends
and books a table at the restaurant
hoping to surprise her and win her affection.
He does this sort of thing regularly
believing that being overly accommodating
will make her see how much he cares for her.
Have you ever dropped everything
for a woman you were interested in
only to be rebuffed?
Share your story.
Simping behavior is often rooted
in a lack of self-confidence.
Women are attracted to men
who display confidence
and self-assuredness.
When a man engages in simping
it shows a lack of confidence
in his own worth and abilities.
Confidence is an attractive quality
and women are drawn to men
who are secure in themselves
and their own value.
Furthermore, women instinctively know
simping leads to clinginess.
When a man becomes overly dependent
on a woman for his emotional well-being
it's draining and suffocating for her.
Emotionally balanced women,
key point, emotionally balanced women
appreciate a healthy level of interdependence
and space within a relationship.
Constant attention and clinginess
can push women away
rather than draw them closer.
Always leave them wanting more.
Example, the emotional tampon.
A man becomes
the constant shoulder to cry on
for a woman he's been longing for.
He willingly listens to her problems
absorbs her emotional burdens
and provides unwavering support.
Even if it's about other men
she's interested in dating.
He's always there for her
hoping his kindness will eventually lead
to a romantic relationship.
I'm pretty sure
some of you have been guilty of this one.
What happened?
Share your stories.
Okay, not only that
but simping often also involves
sacrificing personal boundaries
and disregarding your own needs.
Women need men
to have healthy boundaries
and maintain their own sense of identity
and self-care.
When a man is willing
to compromise his boundaries
to an extreme extent
it raises red flags.
She intuitively wonders
what other values you'll compromise
when your infatuation wears off.
Will you cheat on her, leave her.
If you don't respect yourself
she won't either.
Plus, respect precedes arousal.
Example, the perpetual doormat.
A man changes his entire schedule
and life plans to accommodate
a woman's every whim.
He cancels his plans with friends,
neglects his own hobbies,
and always puts her desires first,
even at the expense of his own well-being,
even when she treats him like trash.
Too many nice guys
turn into doormats.
Has this ever happened to you?
Now, did you figure out the two ways,
two ways to know if you're simping.
Well, the first is feeling like you don't deserve her
or have lower value than her.
And the second way to know
is if you allow her to disrespect
or treat you poorly.
In other words, you ignore red flags,
crap tests and let her get away
with bad behavior
either by trying to appease her
or simply ignoring it.
If that's you, you'll want to watch my videos
on the one little word
you must start using
as soon as possible to stop being too nice.
Links are coming up.
Remember, you deserve someone
who loves and respects you for who you are
but you have to like and respect yourself first.
Key point,
no one will respect you more than you do.
So, start behaving like you do.
Soon you'll feel that way a little more.
These examples showcased
different faucets of simping behavior,
highlighting the excessive attention,
sacrifice and unbalanced
dynamics that can occur.
I hope these scenarios help raise awareness
about the pitfalls of simping
and promote healthier win-win relationships,
based on mutual respect,
mutual appreciation
and of course, reciprocation in all other ways.
So, if you found this video helpful
and you feel like
you want to give it a thumbs up,
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Thanks for being here,
you got this, God bless.