the Sumerian epic abridged have your own experience in 1874 an archaeologist
named Indiana Jones I mean Austen Henry Layard found 22,000
clay tablets hidden in the depths of an ancient city in modern-day Iraq these
tablets contain tons of information about what is often considered the first
civilization of humanity the Sumerians and the civilizations that followed the
Assyrians and the Babylonians the tablets also described their religion
and belief systems which today we find to be the writings that predate many of
the world's religions today especially the Abrahamic ones such as Judaism and
Christianity the Sumerian creation epic is hard to learn about because a lot of
the tablets are broken but there are some renditions available of one of
their most prominent creation myths the story begins with Apso and Tiamat the
god of freshwater and saltwater however they are often interpreted to be
primordial forces in the elementary universe OPSEU also has a busier whose
name is MooMoo together OPSEU and Tiamat give birth to a bunch of new gods and
goddesses usually in pairs of two you've got LOM you and l'homme on sharon
key char and on you and iya the kid gods are super annoying and so obstinate Saul
angry with them and he says he wants to kill them the kids find out about this
and go to Anki for help Anke puts off sue to sleep chains up
MooMoo and takes off his throne then inky and his wife who shows up out of
nowhere have a baby together named Marduk who was very manly has four eyes
and breathes fire granpappy on who gives Marduk's something called the four winds
which sends a wave of upset to tiem on mama Tiamat gets really mad and creates
a bunch of monsters and basically declares war on her children the gods
all get together and figure out a plan and over beer and pastries they agree
that Marduk's shall be their Avenger Marduk and Tiamat go to war
Maur Duke ends up killing Tiamat with his windy magic and an arrow and cuts
her in half he binds up her monster army and directs Babylon in his own honor
some time passes and then he has Anki create humans because he's just got a
really good feeling about it and it turns out that humans make great slaves
so it works out the story ends with Margit getting fifty holy names and
everyone thinks he's just the best now this story has probably been met with a
lot of blank stares for a long time because WTF is this even talking about
but then enter zecharia sitchin the world's expert on what is often
considered pseudo history who studied cuneiform growing up and came to the
conclusion that the story went deeper than what most people believed he came
to the conclusion that the story was not about gods at all but planets and some
crazy stuff that went down in a distant past long before humans even existed at
all his interpretation goes something like this in the birthplace of the solar
system there were several primordial bodies one was the Sun that was king
OPSEU a little orbiting body called mercury who was OPS's vizier and a
watery planet called Tiamat who orbited the Sun right around where the asteroid
belt is today and I bet you can see where this is going in the formation of
the solar system many other planets were formed Venus and Mars were Lamia and
maja Mew Jupiter and Saturn were on char and
Keisha and on oh and iya where Uranus and Neptune these planets had crazy
orbits and put TM on in danger this was the kids being super rowdy and just
having way too much fun Sitchin thought that eeeh putting Apso
to sleep was somehow related to the Sun settling its own turbulent energy during
this early formation period and that new planets had to come from outside of the
solar system thus putting iya in charge in a way and so then a new planet comes
into the solar system Marduk this planet might have come from another solar
system whose star exploded or something like that but either way if it came into
the solar system and tore some matter from Uranus's body this was aa new
giving mardik the four winds which were large satellites hurling around the
planet from there Marv Duke approached the
inner solar system as it passes Saturn Marduk pulls one of Saturn's moons away
from it and into space creating Pluto which is a part of the story we're on
shark the god planet presently known today as Saturn sends its vizier Gaga
off to visit some other gods then Margot keeps going and lines up really well to
collide with Tiamat goody Marduk's gravity causes T Emma to release a
number of monsters I mean that satellites of its own which kind of acts
like a really bad shield one of these is really big and later becomes the moon
it's a close call but these whirling winds smash into tema and tear her own
listen to Marduk sails off into space but is now destined to return to the
scene of this event its orbit locked in around the Sun then thousands of years
pass and eventually Marduk once again smashes into Tiamat tearing her into
again and this time one large chunks makes its way into the position where it
is today a bunch more time passes and boom Shakalaka this chunk eventually
becomes the earth supposedly Marduk still remains in our solar system with a
3600 year cycle and will one day return into our inner system and cause some
gravitational anomalies to our planet and make everybody queasy okay
that's a karai's Sitchin's interpretation but like that's pretty
wild is there any truth to it well the search for a more distant planet beyond
Neptune has been going on for a really long time it's often called Planet X and
there's actually a lot of evidence for a massive body and deep space orbiting our
Sun we see this due to the fluctuations of comets and whatnot that seem to
suggest they're affected by some massive gravity that we haven't found where it's
coming from so far Mike Brown and konstantin batygin are two very
prominent planetary scientists who have proved without a shadow of a doubt
Planet X is out there granted we can't say it's definitively this Nibiru I mean
what if it's a Death Star
anyways if this story is true it explains a lot of things it explains the
asteroid belt which is said to have been caused from the planetary collision of
Tiamat and Marduk it also explains the moon which is believed today to have
been created in a massive collision billions of years ago the story explains
Pluto which has a crazy orbit and nobody today knows definitively where it came
from and finally it explains Uranus which today there's a lot of studies
about just how weird that planet is with its sideways tilt warped magnetics and
stuff like that scientists believe that too was involved in some big collision a
long time ago how about that but then again we got a
call into question the accuracy of these translations are they legit I mean maybe
maybe not ultimately you have to decide for yourself on this one
maybe it's all just like a really really good coincidence a lot of people have
pointed out that zecharia sitchin embellished his stories and other
suggests that he actually couldn't ever read sumerian cuneiform at all how do
you feel about that then finally there is another interpretation available
today called the electric universe theory which takes a different spin on
the whole thing it basically says that the whole universe is electric cars are
like giant gas clouds that light up like light bulb filaments when there's energy
moving through it which come from these massive electrical currents radiating
from the center of the galaxy and that the story of Marduk and Tiamat and other
similar dragon battle stories found in ancient history are all telling the
story of a shift in our solar system when our planet moved from one Sun to
another and that Venus and Mars basically collided with each other and
it was epic and terrifying and yeah pretty much everything changed for us
but you wouldn't be interested in learning about something like that would
you oh you would well you can always watch
the full thing in the Sumerian epic on YouTube to get the full story and while
you're at it you might as well free yourself from the matrix and go check
out patch tyrell in the spirit shop