hi everyone I'm Adrienne Everheart! Your dating and relationship coach and today
I'm going to talk about how to get respect from your man how to find and
attract men that are respectful behave respectful and give you respect
including things like empathy listening kindness and understanding so stick
around for this video I'm going to share some way to use feminine energy to get
respect in men
I don't need to waste any time telling you what disrespect looks or feels like
in a relationship I think by now you know what it feels like to be
disrespected by a man this could come in all sorts of forms such as him not even
returning a phone call not planning dates with you saying he's gonna do
something then he doesn't to just flat out not being empathetic and caring
about how you feel now I don't know about you but the big one that I hear
over at I heart love Academy and the big one that always affected me was my man
didn't seem to care how I felt so when I discovered feeling statement I was like
oh boy I've got the secret key to getting a guy to do anything I want and
that's not really how feeling statements work remember feeling statements aren't
here to get the man to do something they are your truest and most honest
representation of how you feel feelings statements are not to be used to get a
man to show you respect I am sure you have possibly had situation where you've
said you don't respect me and you need to show some more respect around here
right you've said something like this either to your children or to a man in
your life and how did it work did they suddenly wake up and said you know
you're right so we're gonna go about this a different way into getting a
man's respect but the first thing I want to do is I want to get your energy to a
place of feminine energy where you are not having expectations you are not
having a sense of entitlement a sense that you are owed from the man because
he is in the masculine energy now one of the toughest pills I ever had to learn
how to swallow is no one owes me anything no one owes you anything no one
owes you kindness no one owns you gratitude no one owes you a smile a hug
oh well wish none of that nobody owes you anything and it's kind of
difficult to accept that but not even our parents owe us anything we are lucky
and fortunate to get any amount of love tenderness support or appreciation from
anyone however I do believe when one of you changes the other one changes so I'm
gonna teach you how your good will begets goodwill but for right now I want
you to let your man off the hook a little bit and just because you've had a
terrible day and he doesn't want to hear about it
or he shuts down the minute you started talking about a problem that you guys
were having in the house or the relationship it really doesn't mean he's
a bad guy he's just doing what men do which is they try to fix something they
try to fix it kind of quickly and sometimes the way men the fastest way
for a man to fix something is just to say stop talking about it stop talking
about it's gonna go away and a lot of times you actually continue this legacy
it can be a family legacy in his life or family legacy in yours where we don't
talk about problems you know we don't talk about this sort of thing and
everybody just walks around and lives their life as if whatever it is going
wrong is not really happening so it's a type of denial this is where goodwill
begets goodwill which means your guy's gonna have a bad day he's gonna have a
bad moment his ball team's gonna lose he's gonna get in a fight with her
friend or a brother he's gonna have an argument with somebody from work he's
gonna get a flat tire he's gonna get some bad news he's gonna have a bad day
and this is where instead of you putting on your boy pants and going out to fix
it you get to actually show him what it feels natural for you to do when you're
in that situation now we don't want you to give the man the type of attention
you want to get from him because that's a different type of thing so often women
will write love letters or send lots of messages of support and encouragement
and that's what we like to get that's not necessarily
man likes to get but I'm gonna show you a form of that and that's a tool I teach
called really really get him so let's recap real quick
number one he doesn't owe you anything he doesn't owe to listen to your
problems he doesn't owe to be there for you or help you understand or take the
time to really give you a thoughtful considerate reply number one no one owes
you anything so let's set the standard real low okay
number two goodwill begets goodwill if he is down on his luck he's having a bad
moment this is where you can show him I can ride your wild ride I can ride
whatever misery is going on in your world we call it riding the roller
coaster because you're gonna have a day where you're on a roller coaster and he
will remember you're listening to him and being there for him now let me tell
you how to do it in feminine energy because otherwise the man might go I'm
never telling her my problems again because she did this this and this and I
was trying to get me to do a EFT and take a bubble bath and have her herbal
tea and that's not how a man will you know process something like that I mean
don't get me wrong I think some guys may like some of that but that's where
you're in this action place you're doing for him so this is the tool I teach it's
called really really get him and it is so easy and you don't have to be in your
boy energy at all in fact you're in your feminine energy of observing where I'm
observing and I'm listening and hearing and sensing so let's say your guy had an
argument with his boss so everybody right now we're watching
this video just imagine your guy he calls you up and he goes oh total s show
at work today I had a terrible time my boss was on my back the whole day and
orders are gonna be late now let's say he says something like that so would you
close your eyes and I want you to imagine what his face looks like while
he's telling you that and I want you to name one emotion that you
in his face just one and it might be worried scared concerned angry ticked
off whatever it is and at that moment you just simply say to him well you must
feel really ticked off okay or well you must feel really P owed at your boss and
then you stop the man will then either say yes I do or he will say no that's
not what's happening to which you still just sit back and listen now does this
mean that you have to sit and listen to this man for hours and hours and go on
every day about everything wrong in his life no you have boundaries so let's
recap real quick a little bit in this process about what boundaries made I
tell all my clients and everybody over I heart love Academy that you want to
listen to a man uninterrupted for anywhere from about one to about five
minutes and even if five minutes is too long for you and he's still going on and
on about his day you can draw the line there but I want you to do it with
warmth because remember this is a man that has sometimes been very dismissive
with you when you've come to him with a problem so I want you to just sit there
and do this number mm-hmm uh-huh not and listen not and listen in and out all the
time not and listen that's all you do hmm hmm catch a glimpse of the time
don't look at your phone give it about three to five minutes where you nod and
listen now if he's the type of man that just goes on and on and on and on and on
and on and on you're gonna have to draw a line and have a boundary and just say
oh honey you know you must be feeling whatever it is you must be feeling so
fatigued by this whole situation you know and I think I'm kind of at my limit
with it - would you like a hug you offer a hug
it's that easy so how is this gonna get you respect I believe good will begets
good will I believe when you treat your partner
this way but you're not going hey let me go out to order you some steaks and make
you a big dinner make you feel better let me get you a bubble bath
let me call these people and let me help you you're not in action you see it's a
big difference but you're just there for him you're just there you're nodding
you're listening you're really really getting him and you're letting him
correct you when you didn't get him the right way go ahead and let him correct
you he hasn't felt like a man all day and he's finally feeling like a man
talking to you and this is where you want your man you want your man when
he's with you he feels like a man he feels like the biggest baddest greatest
most wonderful man in the world when he's with you because other people out
there may not have this effect on him they may not have the opportunity to
have this effect on him you see if they're just texting or whatever an
employee or another girl he's dating or whatever they might not have the
opportunity to have this time with him but you do so this is how you lasso a
man's heart I talk about it so often and ultimately I believe you will get his
respect let's say a guy is being down and dirty and treat me with total
disrespect I want you to have a really really low low level of tolerance for
this sort of thing and the lower you have it the better that he is going to
treat you or learn how to treat you but it is when you sustain bad behavior is
when you go along with it that you create a much greater opportunity for
him to be disrespectful now are men bad because they're disrespectful I think
they can be but in most case says they're just really doing a very
natural thing in their DNA now I want to tell you I have a theory
women have a whole extra leg on our chromosome and in that chromosome we get
a whole lot more information about you know how other person may be feeling we
can kind of surmise and know what's going on in this situation we can feel
it we can sense it that's all of our feminine energy powers I don't think
guys do this as good if at all so if a man is being really disrespectful to you
I want you to cut it off quick and be warm about it just say oh oh my goodness
it feels so wonderful to hear from you but my goodness I haven't gone on a date
with you in a couple of weeks and I'm looking for a really regular dating
relationship so I've kind of moved on you let him know now he might at that
point clean up his act and say oh my goodness there's an alert going off in
his brain this is a high quality woman and I need to be there for her let's say
a man called you a really bad name he's a name caller you can say you know you
can talk to me however you want to talk to me that's your right but when I hear
I'm being called this name here's how I feel I feel this small I feel like I
just want to puke I feel so sad and small inside whatever it is you feel now
remember ladies this is not giving a guy permission to call you names this is
about if you love a man he's behaving badly you want to see where this unfolds
remember that man is in front of you as a teacher right now and he's here to
teach you something it is so quick to go next I'm done with
you red flag run it's so easy to do that and I want you to just you know give it
five minutes give it five more minutes of your time where you can have that
boundary and practice this beautiful beautiful boundary you have it yourself
in my ebook 500 ways to talk to a man I have loads more of these scenarios just
about every scenario you can come up with even if a man doesn't want to pay
for the date he's like I think we should pay fifty-fifty I have a boundary for
that or if he isn't seeking commitment he's hardly calling he's only texting
and not calling at all I cover all of that because those are all the ways a
man can behave disrespectful and what's really happening I believe in most cases
is that they have not been woken up to feminine energy yet because there just
aren't enough women out there in their feminine energy there are women out
there treating men like men and they're just shutting him down next throwing it
away remember what I talked about in the beginning of this video I said when a
man finds a problem what does he do he just gonna shut up about it that's the
quickest way to solve it and be over that's how we're treating men now is
that your disposable all these men are disposable and don't get me wrong you
can pass on whoever you want to pass on but use it as an opportunity to practice
when you practice and you win that badge you get that new place of speaking and
being in your feminine energy I believe you move up a tier and the
more and more you move up tiers the more high quality men you attract to yourself
who are on a similar tier but we start where we're at we just start where we're
at so if you're running into a lot of disrespectful men and men that are just
being rude and crude I want you to learn how to speak to them without being
snarky and giving it right back and batting it right back and finding other
ways to be amusing about this sort of behavior I want you to handle it with
your soft warm loving feminine energy who does the soft warm loving feminine
energy love she loves you you are who we are doing this for we are not doing it
for the man we are doing it for you now if you find yourself having a really bad
day and you don't want to unload it all on
your guy I want to make sure you always have a good support system in your life
this could be a particular girlfriend you can talk to or a group of girls
you're talking to a Marco Polo or whatever it is I want you to make sure
that you have support and you don't isolate yourself it's always okay to go
to your guy and just say I need a hug and one of my favorite things to do when
you go to a man and get that hug from him is I just want you to kind of
collapse into his arms I speak of it like you're just melting
like a little piece of chocolate in his arms and you lean into him and just put
all of your weight into that hug with him make sure his arms are over top
yours that you're not over top his arms just go into that feminine place and
then while you're getting that hug I want you to imagine that whatever the
problem is inside of you whatever the insecurities fear worry or doubt that
you're having today or it could be just a stomachache or cramps or anything else
that a girl might have I want you to imagine that it's in a little folder
inside your body and when you go to hug him you click on that folder and you
drag it and drop it over in him and I want you to try this and in the comment
section I challenge all of you watching this video in the comment section tell
me what your man does when you do this so you have to go in for the hug get
your hug lean in melt and then drag and drop all your little problems right over
to him and see what happens I'm not gonna tell you what happens to me but I
will tell you when I do this with my guy I get a very noticeable change in him
immediately so I look forward to hearing from you all what results you have so
ladies look if you need more education on feminine energy and how this works
check out my group I heart love Academy check out my ebook 500 ways to talk to a
man I have a lot of programs different things that will help you
learn more about your feminine energy learn more about the warmth and waking
this up in your body again not for the man but for you the great side effect
does your relationship work a lot better it absolutely does so give those a good
look and I look forward to hearing from you in the comments as always subscribe
to me share me with a girlfriend and give this video a like if it has
helped you find a different way of attracting men that will show you
respect and dealing with the ones that are showing up right now who act with
disrespect alright everybody thank you so much for tuning in I look forward to
hearing from you in the comment section