[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
OH, THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU.
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, I
NEEDED THAT LITTLE SHOT OF
POSITIVE ENERGY BECAUSE I HAD AN
INTERESTING DAY, I WOKE UP THIS
MORNING, EARLY, I DID TWO HOURS
OF PRKSILATES AS I DO EVERY MORN
AND THEN OPEN MY COMPUTER AND
FIND OUT I'M AT WAR WITH SEAN
HANDITY AT FOX NEWS.
BECAUSE THERE'S NOTHING
IMPORTANT GOING ON IN THE
COUNTRY THEY SPENT A LOT OF TIME
TALKING ABOUT ME APPARENTLY TOOK
ISSUE ABOUT A JOKE I MADE THIS
IS WHAT HE HAD TO SAY.
>> THIS IS BRUTAL LIBERAL JIMMY
KIMMEL MAKING FUN OF THE FIRST
LADY OF THE UNITED STATES AND
HER INVOLVEMENT IN THE WHITE
HOUSE EASTER EGG ROLL AND EVEN
HER ACCENT, JIMMY YOU'RE A
DISPICABLE DISGREAT.
TAKE A LOOK.
>> Jimmy: OKAY BEFORE WE TAKE A
LOOK.
WANT THE TO RECAP WHAT HE SAID
WAS IT'S BRUTAL AND HERE'S WHY
I'M A DISPICABLE DISGRACE.
>> I'M CURIOUS JUST LIKE A CAT,
ASK LOTS OF QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS
AND THAT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH, ABOUT DIS AND
DAT.
GUILLERMO YOU REALIZE WHAT THIS
MEANS?
YOU COULD BE FIRST LADY.
>> ASS CLOWN KIMMEL WHAT A
DISGRACE, HEY, THAT'S HER FIFTH
LANGUAGE, HOW MANY DO YOU SPEAK?
>> Jimmy: SIX.
I SPEAK SIX LANGUAGES, EXACTLY
ONE MORE THAN MELANIA I SPEAK
ENGLISH, SPANISH, ITALIAN, WHAT
ELSE, CHINESE IS V E GEN E S A
LANGUAGE I DON'T KNOW I DON'T
SPEAK ASS CLOWN WHAT IS AN ASS
CLOWN IS IT A CLOWN THAT LIVES
IN A AN ASS.
I HON LIFT DON'T KNOW.
AND WHY IS HE OPENLY FANTASIZE
BEING CLOWNS IN THE ASS IS THAT
YOUR THING AT NIGHT?
[ LAUGHTER ]
WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR PANTS DOWN
WHEN YOU'RE AT 2 A.M. REQU
YOU GOT YOUR LAPTOP OPEN AND.
>> Announcer: ECK TO HUMP A
PILLOW QUIETLY SO YOUR
HIS PROBLEM IS FOR EIGHT YEARS
NOT ONE ERECTION.
HE TRIED EVERYTHING.
WENT TO OFFICE CHRIS PARTIES
WITH BILL O'REILLY.
NOTHING WORKED.
NOW TRUMP IS PRESIDENT HERE'S
THE TWIST SEAN HINANNITY HAS LOS
HIS TABLET
YOU SEAN ARE THE WHOLE ASS
CIRCUS
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
YOU'RE THE JUGGLER.
YOU'RE THE TRAPEZE ARTIST.
THE ASS LION TAMER AND ASS UNION
BALL OUGHT IN ONE CAR YOU'RE THE
WRINGLING BROTHERS OF BAFRNUM
AND BAILEY OF THE ASS CLOWNSHIP.
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK IS
DISRESPECTFUL TO THE FIRST LADY
CHEATING ON HER WITH A PORN STAR
AFTER SHE HAS A BABY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 86 00:03:52,165 --> 00:00:00,000 AND GO GET A HAIRCUT YOU HIPPY