hello everybody my name is markiplier
and welcome back to ultimate epic battle
simulator now I can't believe I'm back
again I didn't think it happened but I
find this game to be incredibly
intriguing I mean it's very simple on
its surface and there's only so much
that you can do about it but I'm kind of
like kind of like just curious oh that's
boring a flat test map no way we're
gonna go in the world of thieves here
and I'm gonna *Laugh* gonna make sure my wild
man is still there in the forest over
there but I'm gonna have some different
things going on here let's see. No more
more animals we need ooh
oh hell yeah catapults
how many catapults could we possibly have, 5,000 that seems good enough to me we
need to assault this castle somehow
who's gonna stop them well I guess we're
gonna have a fortress of evil or
are we gonna have a fortress of orcs. A
dwarf fortress if you may call it that
if you please but I won't because I'm not dumb
now we can do more dwarves than that
we can do more dwarves and they're
going to be defending. I don't know how they're going
to stop with the catapult but I guess that's
going to be good enough so we got 10,000
dwarfs strong in the there now we're not going
to have you any more no wild man
this time inanimate dresser table and
let's see what 5,000 dressers look like
when they're attacking this guy and the
wild man over there I've no idea
5,000 dressers like are we talking like
the thing you put clothes in that's what
we're talking about right we're not just
talking about a bunch of bullshit we're
talking about literally
we're literally talking about dressers. Oh look at the
dwarves
oh hey dwarvesy, dwarvos whoa
that's a lot of dwarves
oh hey boy hey buddy hey hey guys all
right
okay they're doing their thing I got to
figure out where that how these dressers
are that's a lot of dwarves it's just uh
dressers their uh dressers
against oh my god that's a lot of catapults
I don't know how this is
gonna go where's my wild man oh there he is. Aaaaaaaghhhh! Aaaagh!
I'm gonna kill those dressers Aurrrgh! I can't believe
it ohhhh arrrgh i'm gonna possess this guy. Hey can I just
watch this from afar
oh man being a wild man sure is great I
love it to death aaaahhh! I'm gonna kill ya no
I'm not okay I'm gunna get out of that one go wild
man you go you go you go if I come back and find out
that you're dead I'm gonna be very dissapointed at
the Ohhh ohhuhuhu ohhh
oh it's a massacre oh it's a massacre of
dressers all those poor dressers ohhhh nooo ohhh my godddd all these poor inanimate objects
these poor screaming inanimate objects
for some reason ohhh my god ohhh man
Oh mamba jamba oh god that's terrifying
what are they gonna do.. oh hi ok woahhahahaha
well your not gunna do much good you go up there single file
like that now you killed a few of em you you
bastard to dresssers hahaha you god damn dressers hahaha oh god
oh it's so silly why this is so silly a gonna
Melissa get the time scale up there
that's the good stuff is that too tight
this that's two times speed wait we're
going out of my mind here well there we
go
Oh
we got one of these dresses and I'm
gonna be come with you you go my full
speed how do you even attack what is
your what is your attack here what are
you trying to accomplish I'm gonna flank
them or come up the side they'll never
know you coming for you now we're try me
try me right you tried me you trusted me
through garden we have these dorms we're
gonna have these doors okay
B we're gonna attack Oh I rallied some
okay attack target whoa
go for it you got to get indoors
oh man the cannibals have moved in they
are not happy
oh but the doors there the high ground
question mark oh and the Oh No oh no
where's Wildman while then while did are
you okay oh please tell me wild man's
okay wow man oh oh not again oh wow bad
hey you believe it oh my boss sweet boy
man although it is so very extremely bad
oh look it of Justice Oh cried a little
oven okay fine then and I wish I could
be pop well man those you can beat them
up real good real good
Oh Oh God
god oh god oh no oh they're just dying
which is great hey guys how you doing
you catching face bulls
oh well this guy's impenetrable over
here you'll never hit me
oh ho ho ho
you can't hit me you can't hit me in a
bag okay
as I leave the screams of the Damned
over there we're gonna try this once
more this is so fun I don't know why is
this fun I have no idea all right we're
gonna go into the desert because I want
a nice clear Newt Newt kind day all
right let me figure this out clear all
these we need some fresh blood here all
right I'm gonna make something that's
like ooh whoa golden Knight and Chuck
Norris can we have golden Knight and
Chuck Norris fighting out on a beach I
don't even know what that's going to
mean but there there there we go it's a
clash of titans it's a battle of
immeasurable power is it that it's a
battle it's a battle of the greatest
forces this world has ever known and oh
my god this map is much bigger than us
we've got the golden Knight Chuck Norris
and oh what's that over the crest of the
hill wild man all right we're gonna
start this bad boy oh it's funny all
right yeah we need to turn cinematic
mode on for this and enable this bad boy
here what planning they want that many
wild man oh wait hang on at that part
out I didn't go just one wild man please
we didn't we don't need 250 of them
there's only now I needs to be 100 yeah
it started me out on the right guy a
wild man
ready Wildman is here hey Chuck Norris
and golden Knight you will feast on the
blood of your own blood tonight oh wow
man
okay anyway how's it going golden Knight
you okay you good oh yeah you're good
all right let's see oh hey how's it
going Chucky how's it whoa
Chuck Norris you have I'm not the only
one who notices this doesn't look a
goddamn thing like Chuck Norris right
that's that's not just me this literally
is not Chuck Norris right not the only
one here we need cinematic mode on this
bad boy
all right go Bart kill each other oh
there they go and here comes wild man oh
boy oh let's come down the real fight ha
ha ha ha stupid fuck it is no wild man
oh you brute
you goddamn brute you hassle how could
you you killed him you killed my son ha
ha ha ok let's get a real legit battle I
want a legit battle I want a legit one
clear it out here cleared out here let's
go overdue ah this looks like a good
murder bull right here all right
oh we're gonna build aah I don't even
know rank shape meet unit customized
can I make a wild oh oh really block
kids Oh
projectile he shoots bullet all of his
simple he's a wild man
well there was guns were nipples oh man
he's got so much help
fifty thousand he does 500 damage of
swing if you kid you get you from five
meters away he's gotta for time is super
fast there's wild man oh that is
hilarious
oh man I wanted to shoot this is little
sleeve please attack range
oh yes range be nice time attack range
of 30 meters that's a 50 meter if 50 50
meters is good grab wild man now live
wild man where's wild man costume wow
man
well this please you talk to the wild
myth is now glory is part of this battle
what's that on the hill wild man
all right hang on
hey-hey Merrivale what shut the fuck up
now why man coming in having Knights
versus uh orcs I think like a good
battle that seems like it might be a
good battle okay all right I'm down look
out for this Oh oh I shouldn't have made
it more orcs I thought the orcs weren't
going to be as tough all right I'm ready
what's happening heat oh it's on
cinematic mode I forgot about that
oh god Wildman wait hang on turns into
manic mode up with Wildman while band is
he doing it man
shooting bullets out of his nipple yes
wow man go this car pretty farm chair
okay possess him and I'm gonna whoa
wild man you've seen better days whoa
wait Han wait Bam Bam Bam Beckham well
you can't take these
we're unaware yeah get their sketches
Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss
Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss oh
god damn hero what a fucking hero while
man go get your missing wild man but and
I expect that boom aiming ain't too easy
whoo
quite a battle right after a while
there's two big clumps of bodies
slamming into each other so I guess
that's a thing I can't tell who's
winning or the orcs winning the can tell
myself you around 500 even it's pretty
even what you got big boy over here
that's old now wild man
you keep up with it you're doing great
buddy you're doing beyond great you're
doing wonderful even Oh seems like the
Knights have one do two wild man's
careful assistance oh god they're being
boxed in yeah if they want to take in
some strategy here so let me going to
take some strategies rally oh no no no
no way
and then go to position that's a better
stratagem and then carry on everything
buddies whoo that's better now you're
blinking up oh my god oh my condiments
oh this is a pile of bodies oh I had no
idea
oh that's awesome
there's a lot of uh classic there's a
lot of artists there is a lot of bodies
how do they simulate that that's awesome
and love that oh well the orcs looked
about dead wild man still shooting out
of an M so I think this battle is won
even though they're fighting and often
time down
anyway I think that's it for this
episode I think we did well here so I'll
turn cinematic mode on so uh yeah thank
you everybody so much for watching if
you want to see another cool battle let
me know down the comments below I'll try
to come up with some new ideas on my own
the Sun is setting on this lovely
battlefield and the knights and wild
man's number one so thank you again
everybody summit for watching and as
always I will see you in the next video
*markiplier music*