It is tricky. I don't know why they put corners on...
I mean, why would you?
Well, I was going quite fast.
I was in third.
Oh!
While James's car was being towed out of the ditch,
I took the opportunity to demonstrate
yet another incredible standard feature on my car.
If you want to lower the passenger window,
you can do that from a switch on the driver's door.
But if you want to get it back up again...
you can't.
So, you have to go round to the other side, okay,
and use the button here.
But if you do that, you're going to trap your arm in this gap here.
Now, Peugeot's thought of that, okay?
Obviously, you can't open this door. There's no door lock.
That's for security reasons. So, you pop back round here
and this is incredible...
simply pull this switch, okay?
Windows all go down now.
The roof detaches and now...
Now, look.
I can lift the window...
without...
getting my arm trapped. Can you see?
Brilliant.
With James's car out of the ditch, we relaxed by tuning in to Radio Peugeot.
Jeremy Vine, BBC Radio 2.
Is Britain full? is how we started this.
Alison in Warfield in Berkshire texted and says:
"I can't park at Waitrose. So, yes, we are too full."
Good caller.
That's very nice of him.
He just gave me a little push there to let me know he was coming past.
Corner! Corner!
I've done it. I'm round.
Despite the soothing tones of Radio Peugeot...
Do you think you may have the worst-tasting water in Britain?
Do call us if so, 0500 288 291...
...we found the journey very stressful thanks to badly placed road signs...
and busy junctions.
Maniac.
Yobbo.
Maniac.
Mani... Oh, hold on, I think there's a chance here.
Oh! Damn it!
You've got Johnny Foreigner coming over here, they don't pay a penny...
Bloody council not mending the bloody roads.
James, there's a corner coming up, a corner.
There's a sign saying corner. Do take care this time, okay?
To be honest, I didn't notice James's latest accident
because I'd found yet another feature in my amazing car.
If I push this button here that increases the temperature...
and then hold it down for a little while...
There we go.
Lovely, lovely. Mm-mm, smoke!
Obviously, there's a fair bit of choking you have to go through, but...
look at the result!
People like a... a real fire in their homes.
I've got one in my car.
It's a good job this car has a chimney.
Obviously, that's a very good design feature.
When I met up with James again,
it was at the Peugeot driver's worst nightmare...
a double mini-roundabout.
Now...
Dear God. Right, that's clear.
I don't know.
It's...
Maniac!
Oh, God! No more double mini-roundabouts ever, please.
After such a terrifying ordeal,
we needed hot sweet tea to calm our nerves,
so we went to a nearby garden centre.
Will Hull emails: "I suggest we bring back workhouses.
That would deter people exploiting the state and having as many children...
There's a space there, nearly.
Entrance?
I'm going to have to come in forwards.
A cup of tea. Oh, perfect.
-Seen this, James? -What?
Carrots stop you getting cancer.
-Really? -Yeah.
But The Mail said it was tomatoes. Or was it tomatoes give you cancer?
I thought Diana gave you cancer. Or was it house prices?
No, immigrants do house pr... I get confused.
Afternoon tea over, we got back on the road.
Maniac!
After a busy day, we were heading home, and to get there, we'd fitted our cars
with something called satellite navigation.
Incredible device. It was a present from my children.
It knows where I am on the planet and then it can get me to my house.
All I have to do is as I'm told.
So, I go left here...
Yes.
Right, according to the electric map, I go right.
This is...
overgrown.
The council should really do something about this road here.
It's weird, isn't it? You hear stories all the time about idiots who...
"I was following the satellite navigation and I drove off a cliff, or into a canal."
And you think: "What a moron!"
Must be a shortcut.
Bloody clever.
And here we are.
Home sweet home!
Oh, joy!