Excuse me, sir. Exactly what, uh, type of service...
Does this company provide ?
You get to be john malkovich for 15 minutes.
Two hundred clams.
I see.
No cutting, by the way. No cutting ! Hey, what the hell ?
[ angry shouting ]
Ah ! Ow !
Come on ! Break it up ! Break it up ! Cut it out !
- Everybody gets-- - [ man ] it's him. It's john malkovich.
I'm sorry, mr. Malkovich. I hope we didn't hurt you too terribly.
Get inside !
- Darling ! - What the fuck is going on ?
[ craig ] uh, uh, john malkovich. Huh ?
Mr. Malkovich, sir. Uh, um--
- Mr. Malkovich, I think I can explain. - Yeah, explain.
My name is craig schwartz,
And we operate a little business here...
That simulates, for our clientele, well, the--
The experience of--
Of-- of being you, actually.
- Simulates ? - Yeah, after a fashion.
- What exactly does that mean ? - Well, it's hard to describe.
I want to do it then. That would pale in comparison to the actual experience.
- I want to do it ! - Right now mr. Hiroshi's in the tube--
- Let him do it, craig. - Of course.
Right this way, mr. Malkovich, compliments of the house.
[ whispers ] jesus.
What happens when a man goes through his own portal ?
We'll see.
[ panting ]