RHONDA WEBB: Welcome to AP Daily Practice.
In this session, we will be looking at the long essay
question.
I'm Dr. Rhonda Webb and I live in Roswell, Georgia.
So if you want to practice the LEQ before I go over a sample
answer, you can download the question in the description
below.
Pause the video and then come back
and we'll go over some strategies
for how you might want to approach this long essay
question and then others that you will find on the AP exam.
So in our practice we're going to be using a question that
was from AP Classroom.
It was a released question.
So the first thing that we want to do
is look at what the question is asking us to do.
We need to break the question down and here's
what I want-- here's the process that I want you to follow.
Notice what it's saying here in the very beginning phrase.
It says evaluate the relative importance
of causes of the rise of industrial capitalism
in the United States in the period from 1865 to 1900.
So what does that mean?
Sometimes you'll see different phrasing, but look at this one.
Evaluate the relative importance.
So you're looking at causes.
The reasoning process here is causes of the rise
of industrial capitalism.
By evaluating those causes, you're saying,
OK, all of these things were causes
of industrial capitalism rising during this time period,
but I need to rank them.
This cause was the most important.
These were also important causes,
but not as important as the primary one
that I've determined.
Now could that be different for different people
in their opinion of which cause is most important?
Absolutely.
And that's what the readers want to see.
They want to see your analysis of the information.
I cannot stress that enough.
You need to make sure that your ideas are
the star of the essay.
So we've already mentioned here the reasoning process.
This particular question is asking about causes.
You might have a continuity and change over time question
where it's asking you to evaluate
the relative importance of the changes that happen
during a certain time period.
You might also have one that's looking
at maybe a comparison, similarities or differences,
something like that, but primarily, you're
going to see causes or continuity
and change over time.
So identify what it's asking you to do.
Then you want to identify the time period boundary.
All of your evidence must be within this time period.
So if we think about these two dates, 1865 and 1900,
what do we know about those dates?
Well, 1865 would be right at the very end of the Civil War,
and then 1900 would be getting us
through that rise of big business
and the Gilded Age at the turn of the century.
So that's some ideas that will already
start to give us some thoughts of where to take our answer.
Then we want to look at the focus of the question.
In this particular one, it's asking us
about industrial capitalism.
So we need to make sure that we understand
what that's saying, which we'll look at in just a second.
So if we're breaking down what it's asking us to do,
we're evaluating causes, what does industrial mean?
Well, that means we're talking about large scale production.
Maybe that's manufacturing.
We're doing the production process
where we have lots of items produced
in a very short amount of time.
Capitalism is referring to that private ownership of business,
and we're also paying workers a wage to do the work for us
in our factory setting.
So we want to think about how these causes are developing
more industrial capitalism.
So the first thing I tell students to do on an LEQ,
you want to bring in as much good evidence as you can,
then you organize it into your claims.
So brainstorm the vocabulary.
And by vocabulary, I'm talking about proper names.
I'm talking about events, different specific information
that you've learned throughout the year that
relates to this question.
So I've just listed quite a few terms here.
We're not going to go through and define all of these.
If you want more information about the content
from this time period, you can always go back to AP Classroom
and watch some of the AP Daily videos
that will go more into the content.
Here we're looking more at our process
for answering this essay question.
So I brainstormed all of this vocabulary
from the time period, and then my next step
is to figure out what would be the causes of the rise
of industrial capitalism.
Can I group some of these terms together that would then
form my body paragraphs?
I can immediately find some connections here.
We've got JD Rockefeller, Andrew Carnegie Cornelius Vanderbilt,
and they were sometimes referred to as the captains of industry,
and we know that they built those trusts and monopolies.
I could group those together and that would be a great body
paragraph, if I can craft this into being
a cause of the rise of industrial capitalism.
This term that I had put out here, Robber Barons,
I'm probably not going to put that in my grouping
because that would be that negative connotation,
and we're talking about the rise of industrial capitalism,
not necessarily tearing that down in society.
I've also grouped these terms together
because they're all looking at ways that the government
influenced the economic policy of the time, where you've
got the grants and the subsidies,
the gold standard, the tariff, and then
this lack of regulation over these businesses.
We also have a lot of new technology
that could aid in the rise of production.
And then we also have the strikes and the labor unions
that form when the workers are unsatisfied
with what they're being paid and the conditions
in these factories.
So we've grouped all of our terms,
but now we need to go ahead and start saying, OK,
our evaluation.
Let's evaluate these causes.
So if we're looking at causes of industrial capitalism,
I have four categories here, but there's
one category that I probably should eliminate based
on my information, and that would
be the strikes and the labor unions
because wouldn't that be an effect
of industrial capitalism, not a cause?
We saw that the workers became dissatisfied with their pay,
so that would be more of an effect.
Now you might want to bring that in if you have extra time when
you're writing in your conclusion
where you've reiterated what you say are the main causes,
then maybe fast forward and bring
in some of the possible long term effects.
That might get you towards this idea of complexity a little bit
when you're beginning to imagine some of the effects in addition
to the causes that you're highlighting.
So here's our question.
We want to write a great thesis statement.
This is going to be the key to your essay,
where you are putting all of those claims
into one concise statement.
So here's an example of a thesis statement
that a student wrote for this particular essay question.
So look at what it says.
The rise of industrial capitalism
between 1865 and 1900 was primarily caused by--
there's that evaluation, primarily caused
by captains of industry who benefited
from new forms of businesses business enterprises,
and then the secondary causes included
implementation of government policies
that favored the growth of big business,
and the availability of a large labor supply
that facilitated America's industrialization.
They've done a great job of evaluation here.
They distinguished this is what I believe
is the main reason for the rise of industrial capitalism,
these other reasons are certainly important,
but they're secondary to my primary cause.
And so we know exactly what the body paragraphs
are going to be about.
They have their line of reasoning.
The first body paragraph will be the new forms of business
enterprises, the second body paragraph
would be the government policies,
and then they've gone the route of using
the availability of the large labor supply, not necessarily
the protests, but the immigrant labor that's come in.
You could have had something else.
You could have included the technology here as part
of your causes, but they've established
a line of reasoning.
So then the structure of my body paragraphs
will be this primary cause, secondary cause,
secondary cause.
So now what goes in those body paragraphs.
Here's how you would want to structure this.
You've got your introductory paragraph, which
is where you're going to have your contextualization,
and you're going to have your thesis statement.
So contextualization would be the background.
What was happening prior to 1865 that would not
have really allowed for the rise of big business
that then suddenly begins to happen after this point?
That would be your contextualization
and your thesis statement.
Then in your body paragraph, all of that great vocabulary,
you want to bring in there as evidence.
But start the body paragraph with a topic sentence that
tells the reader, here's what I'm going
to prove in this paragraph.
I'm going to prove that this is a primary cause
or a secondary cause, and I'm going
to show that through my vocabulary that I'm using.
So in the body paragraph, after the topic sentence,
bring in those specific vocabulary examples.
I would like for you to define the vocabulary,
show that what you're talking about.
You're not just throwing in vocabulary terms.
You're demonstrating that you understand them.
You also want to then explain how or why
does this vocabulary term or example prove my topic
sentence?
Don't just say it.
You've got to explain why.
This shows a primary cause because, and then get
into your explanation.
Body paragraph two, you're going to do the same thing.
You're going to bring in those good definitions
in your explanations and analysis, same thing
with body paragraph three, and then
tie it all together in a good conclusion, re-emphasizing
why body paragraph one is the primary cause.
Let's look at a student sample, and I
know the handwriting is a little difficult to read.
That's something to kind of file away.
You want to make sure that you're
writing in a clear manner for the readers
to be able to interpret.
So look what they have to say.
This is their introductory paragraph.
The 1860s were a devastating time
in American history because of the Civil War
where so many American lives were lost.
It seemed as though the country would not recover emotionally
or financially, but it did.
Following the Civil War was a period called
the Reconstruction, which was meant to unify the country,
and help restore the economy.
The Reconstruction period would eventually
lead to the Gilded Age in America
where industrial capitalism thrived,
and the country saw an economic boom.
The rise of industrial capitalism
toward the end of the 19th century
can be attributed to the rise of American social Darwinism,
the formation of big business in the industry,
and the laissez faire government approach.
This is an excellent, excellent introductory paragraph.
They've got a good contextualization,
they've described the period prior to 1865,
and leading into this idea of reconstruction
and the Civil War that leads us into the Gilded Age.
They've got a good transition there from the past,
the destruction of the Civil War into the rise of big business.
So they've done a good job with contextualization here.
Do they have a good thesis statement?
I think they do.
They've got our claims, the rise of social Darwinism,
which again that's going to be a social concept,
the distribution of wealth, we've
got the formation of big business,
and we've also got the government approach.
So we've got a thesis statement with clear claims
that address the question.
But I have a slight concern.
I don't see much evaluation here.
Have they prioritized the causes?
I don't see that in the thesis statement,
but let's see if we find it here in this first body paragraph.
All right so look at what we have in this body paragraph.
Industrialization in America led to the formation
of big business such as the Standard Oil Company
and Carnegie Steel, all of which fueled industrial capitalism.
Big business in the late 1800s made it, so
the rich government--
the rich got extremely richer, and the poor
became extremely poor.
These big business approach-- businesses
approached the industry in a way that
had never been seen before.
Industrial tactics such as horizontal and vertical
integration.
The Titans of industry during this period,
such as JP Morgan, James Vanderbilt, John Rockefeller,
and Andrew Carnegie favored capitalism strongly,
in comparison to the middle class who despised it.
The growth of big business from 1865 to 1900
is arguably one of the most important factors
which caused the rise of industrial capitalism
in America.
So we know that they have a good topic sentence here talking
about the formation of big business,
and we know what they're trying to prove in this body
paragraph.
So that's clear, that big business
is part of this rise of industrial capitalism.
We've got specific evidence.
Now there are some flaws in this.
I see a mistake in the name James Vanderbilt
versus Cornelius Vanderbilt, but they've
got enough that is correct that would give them credit.
I would like to have seen them define
the terms a little bit more horizontal
and vertical integration.
They're talking about that these were new methods for setting up
a business, but they've not necessarily
defined it very well.
It's there.
You've got a little bit of a definition
about it being a new approach to business,
but not necessarily saying what it is.
And I would also like them to tell us
what businesses these individuals were in.
But there's enough here to give credit
for specific information.
And look what we have found.
We've got evidence for analysis.
They're saying that this is different from what
had been happening before.
You've got this growth of this upper class
and these new businesses, and so we do have some analysis here.
And guess what, we found our valuation.
They're saying that this rise of big business
is arguably one of the most important factors that
cause the rise of industrial capitalism in America.
So they didn't have it necessarily in their thesis
statement, now they have it in their body paragraph
and I think that's sufficient.
So when you're approaching a long essay question,
here's what I want you to do.
Make sure that you're putting in your own analysis,
and that's that evaluation part.
Brainstorm and use the specific vocabulary
related to the prompt.
Don't be very general.
You want specific examples that prove that your claim is
correct, and then you need to organize your essay
around the thesis statement, and you
want to explain how or why in those body paragraphs
your vocabulary proves your point.
That's going to be your analysis of your examples.
I can't stress this enough.
You have got to make sure that you're
bringing in your own ideas and interpretation
in order to prove your point.
So with those pieces of analysis will allow you to,
again prove your claim about primary and secondary causes
or primary and secondary changes.
So with that, I hope that you have
a better understanding of how to approach a long essay question.
You're going to do great.
Keep your essay organized, bring in good examples, and evaluate.
So until next time, keep reading and go make history.