• From whether penguins are seafood to which of your children is the worst, the Planet
Dolan crew re-enact more of the best true stories from our subreddit about the dumbest
things we’ve seen people fight over.
I’m Hellbent – and today I’ll be your narrator.
Number 10 was submitted by saggypigeon Pringle A few years ago Pringle dated a girl who was
a stage-five clinger!
One time she called up Pringle’s parents house looking for Pringle, and Pringle’s
dad told her he had gone to Wendy’s.
Unfortunately Pringle’s girlfriend didn’t realize Wendy’s was a fast food place and
jumped to the wrong conclusion!
She spammed Pringle with phone calls.
When she eventually got a hold of him, she immediately screamed, “WHO THE FUCK IS WENDY?!?”
No “Hi, how are you?”
Pringle tried to explain to her that he was just getting a burger from a restaurant called
Wendy’s, but she would not listen!
They had a huge fight about it and, in the end, Pringle was forced to break up with her.
He decided he couldn’t deal with her severe trust issues.
Number 9 was submitted by J4CKED_UP Nixxiom One night Nixxiom went out to dinner with
his friends.
While they were eating, Nixxiom overheard a very drunk couple at the table next to them.
They were having an argument about which of their children was the worst.
The father thought the oldest child was the biggest pain in the ass ever, but the mother
argued that the middle child was worse.
They were getting really angry about it and a waiter had to tell them to be quiet.
In the end Nixxiom heard them come to an agreement: they decided their middle child was definitely
the worst!
Number 8 was submitted by murdoc-is-god HoneyBits A few years ago, HoneyBits and her two best
friends went to the library.
While they were sitting around, HoneyBits’ two friends started arguing.
It wasn’t over a boy, or grades; it was over whether penguins were considered seafood!
HoneyBits listened to them argue for two whole days over this dumb question.
At first it was funny, but it eventually became really annoying!
In the end, HoneyBits had to get a teacher involved to finally put the question of whether
penguins were seafood to bed!
Number 7 was submitted by xXElizaspinksXx Spincess
One time Spincess was walking past her school’s basketball court when a huge fight broke out.
Two kids she’d had never seen before started punching and spitting and kicking the shit
out of each other.
Things turned really bad when one of the fighters took a huge bite out of the other kid’s
arm!
Blood went everywhere and the kid had to get taken to the emergency room!
When Spincess went over to ask what the fight had been about, she found out it was over
some stolen Pokémon cards!
Both kids got suspended for fighting but amazingly they’re actually friends now!
Number 6 was submitted by hellbentbebetter Dean the Time Wanderer
One time Dean was having a family dinner at home.
His mom asked him to set up the silverware, so Dean gave his sister a big fork and his
brother a smaller one.
Dean’s sister sneakily switched the forks when her brother wasn’t looking.
But he eventually noticed and went straight into ANGER MODE!
He threw his fork on the ground and started screaming about how his sister was the biggest
jerk ever!
His sister lied and said she hadn’t done anything, and they argued about one little
fork for fifteen minutes!
Dean sat there the whole time with no idea what to do.
Eventually their mom got involved.
She replaced their forks with spoons and said, “Shut up and eat your friggin’ food!”
The best part was that by the time they’d finished fighting their dinner was completely
cold!
Number 5 was submitted by Redhawkg Doopie It was the last day of school and Doopie and
her two best friends were taking a selfie to remember the occasion.
Doopie was going through her filters when her first friend shouted, “Stop!
Pick that one!”
Her second friend immediately cut in and shouted, “No!
The dog one was cuter!”
What should have been a minor disagreement quickly blew up and became a serious argument.
Doopie watched as her two friends started attacking each other and saying nasty things
– all because they couldn’t agree on a Snapchat filter!
They stopped being friends and still aren’t to this day…
Number 4 was submitted by 808CoffeeRun Cidius One day Cidius’s roommate came home with
a new girlfriend.
That night the three of them watched a movie together, and Cidius thought that she was
pretty cool.
But the next morning Cidius changed his mind!
He was woken up at seven am by his roommate’s girlfriend shouting hysterically.
It turned out she’d dreamt her boyfriend had cheated on her, so she decided to push
him out of bed and start screaming accusations at him.
At that moment Cidius sure was glad to be single…
Number 3 was submitted by Hiroko-San Pandora One time Pandora went to a party at her friend’s
place.
Everyone there was having a great time dancing, playing games and eating pizza.
But when they got down to the last slice of pizza things changed…
Pandora watched as three of her friends had the dumbest fight anyone’s ever had.
Each of them wanted the last piece.
At first they were just joking around, but pretty soon the fight turned real.
Pandora’s friends pushed each other, called each other names and ripped out each other’s
hair.
The fight was so crazy that their precious last piece of pizza got pulled apart in all
the chaos.
No one wanted it anymore after that and the whole party was ruined.
Number 2 was submitted by sleepbaby77 Danger Dolan
One time Dolan was staying over at his brother’s house.
That night he heard someone shouting so he poked his head out of his room to investigate.
His brother Zaraganba was having an epic argument with his wife.
Dolan listened in for a bit and discovered they were fighting about… toilet paper.
Zaraganba’s wife was furious that Zaraganba had hung the roll of toilet paper the wrong
way.
She demanded he go into the bathroom and turn it the right way.
But Zaraganba refused so he was banished to the couch for the night!
Number 1 – What’s the dumbest thing I’ve seen people fight over?