What happens to your body after you die?
Nobody wants to die
but it may better to find out what happens to you now
so when your corpse starts turning purple
it doesn't come as a horrible surprise
First up: When do you die?
This seems like a simple thing to work out
But, historically speaking, it's not been as clear cut as you'd hope
Hans Christian Anderson, Alfred Nobel, Abraham Lincoln
and countless others throughout history have all feared being buried alive
And for good reason...
People have been buried alive
A lot
The Romans were so worried about it
they would cut off a finger of your corpse to see if the stump bled
Which is fine, assuming you are actually dead
They'd also do you the courtesy of yelling out your name three times
while you were on the funeral pyre
Margaret?
Margaret?!
Margaret??!?!?!
So, if you didn't yell "Hey!"
or bleed profusely from your stump
their thinking was you probably had snuffed it
Admittedly, it wasn’t foolproof
And humanity would go on to accidentally bury people alive for centuries
Thankfully, we've got better at detecting pulses and breathing
and these days define death as:
"An irreversible cessation of spontaneous respiratory and cardiac functions"
"Irreversible cessation of all functions of the entire brain, including the brain stem is dead"
Today if someone declares you dead and they're a good doctor
It's almost certain you're a goner
So, what happens to your body while you're dead?
You're going to stink out the room
Seconds after you die, your neurons stop functioning
Meaning your brains stop secreting hormones to regulate other body functions
You enter primary flaccidity, where every muscle in your body relaxes
All of them, if you catch my drift..?
No?
Well...
Everyone is about to catch your drift because without control of your sphincter
you are about to shit and piss yourself moments after you die
Not a huge amount, you also lack muscles to do any forcing out
But enough to make your ghost blush
Pallor Mortis
15-20 minutes after death
if you have light or white skin
You're going to go through some pallor mortis
Your skin will turn even paler
but considering you're dead, lack of rouge is the least of your problems
Algor Mortis
Working your way through the least disgusting mortises
next up is algor mortis
Your body now starts to match the temperature of wherever you are
In a normal place, it will get colder
If it's an oven, you'll heat up and also, it might be why you died in the first place
Don't get used to your new temperature, because as soon as you begin to decompose
your gut bacteria starts to digest itself
And you'll begin to get nice and toasty again
Rigor Mortis
When you're alive, your muscles contract and relax due to two motor protein filaments
Actin and Myosin
When your muscles are contracted, they remain until adenosine triphosphate binds to the myosin
Causing your muscles to relax
Without oxygen, for a short time, your body produces adenosine triphosphate
But eventually this stops
Finally without it, your muscles remain tense and your body becomes stiff
starting with your smaller muscles
such as in your face, hands, and feet
and working your way up
Soon most of you will be distressingly rigid
Blood Pooling
With no way of pumping blood around the body
our old friend gravity takes over
Your blood pools at whatever parts of your body happen to be nearest to the ground
Turning you purple
whilst the rest of you remains deathly pale
Self Digestion
Now that you're dead, your immune system will shut down
It’s OK, you're dead! You don't need to worry about catching the sniffles
But shortly after death, your body is about to become a party for ravenous microbes
Without an immune system to keep them in line
your gut bacteria will begin to digest your intestines
Then, once it's broken free, any surrounding tissue
Living off chemicals that have leaked out of your damaged cells
Still hungry, it'll head on to digest your liver, before spreading to your heart and brain.
As grim as this sounds, it does help forensic scientists figure out when you died
Bacteria spreads to your liver around 20 hours after death
Bad News
You're digesting yourself
Good News
We know it was around 58 hours ago
because you've begun to digest every organ we've tested
Your hair and nails will look like they're growing
Your hair and nails do not keep growing after you die
but it'll sure look like it as your skin becomes dehydrated and shrinks
Fun - and by fun we mean disgusting - fact
This may be part of where the vampire myth comes from
When people in the past opened up coffins and found the dead had a new hairstyle and manicure
They weren't entirely logical about it
Couple this with an abdomen inflated by gases
And the local townsfolk will think you've been off feasting on the living
and stopping off for a quick pedicure before returning to your coffin before dawn
It's stake and garlic time!
You aren't done moving
Just because you're dead doesn't mean you can rest
Researchers at a body farm recently took a timelapse of corpses
every 30 seconds over a period of 17 months
The researchers expected to see some movement in the early days after death
Instead they witnessed continued movement for over a year and half
The motion could be the result of ligaments shortening as they dry out
The arms were moving significantly
For example
Arms that started down by the body’s side ended up at 90 degrees away from it
You'll enter the maggot cycle!
As far as cycles you want to be included in
the maggot cycle isn't top of the list
As you decompose, your body gives off a sickly sweet smell, which starts attracting flies
Every fly lays around 250 eggs
which hatch within 24 hours
These eat and grow until they are adults
and the cycle repeats until there is nothing left to consume
Maggots can consume up to 60% of your body within a week
If being eaten by maggots and bacteria wasn't enough
The larvae will attract larger scavengers
also hoping for a tasty meal
Congratulations, you are now a skeleton!
Within months, assuming your body isn't being preserved
You will decompose until there's nothing left but a skeleton
Your skeleton will become brittle and dry within 50 years
Your bones may last for hundreds of years
before they too are dissolved by acid in the soil
which in turn enriches it and thus feeding life.