Hi, it's Mark here from Make Him Yours. And today, I'm talking about the seven secrets
to making a man fall deeply in love with you. There's some really cool stuff we're going
to talk about today, and I wanna just preface it by saying that this is stuff that's going
to help you understand men and understand the precursors in a man's mind before he falls
in love. So I hope men are gonna do the exact same for you. In fact, the goal of this video
is to help you attract a man who's going to put in the exact same work to understanding
you. So let's get into the seven secrets of making a man fall in love.
Now, number one, Matty! We're filming, get high over here. Hey! How are you going bro?
I'm ready. I'm ready to go. You got your apple? You happy? I brought in a friend of mine who
you probably know is one of the most amazing coaches on the entire web. This is Mat Boggs,
and he's going to talk about the hows today of how to actually make this happen. Action
is so important.
We're going to give you some actual strategies that you can implement right now to evoke
that feeling in love in him.
Action is huge and you have to be able to take away from this video and action on it.
So Matty's going to explain exactly how to do them. The first one is deep connection.
So for a man to fall in love with you, he has to feel deeply and intimately bonded to
you. He has to have that vulnerability. He has to have that ability to really dive in
and form that, that oxytocin, that close bond where he just doesn't want to let you go.
He feels he can be deeply vulnerable and safe and present with you. Now a lot of women know
this, but when it comes to actually how to create that, they blank, Matty.
So the antithesis, what most people don't actually anticipate is that men need to feel
safe just like you women need to feel safe in the relationship. And so how to create
that bond, you even stated up here, is to create that safe place and you do that by
holding space. Now, here's what's interesting about holding space. Most people, when you
say holding space, they don't even have a concept for what that looks like. Like, okay,
how do you hold space and almost sounds kind of woo woo. But it's actually very simple
and very powerful. And that is when you can just be with a man and let him share. There
are really important moments in a man's life when he just needs to share. He needs to share
his thoughts, his feelings, but he won't share it in the way your female girlfriends will.
It will often take him way longer to get to his point. He's formulating it as he's sharing
it. And so, what you do with your girlfriends is you'll jump in, you'll connect. "Oh, you
know what? I felt that way too in my, in times in my life." Or you'll give him advice or
you give him strategy and you'll actually jump in and interrupt him while he's trying
to share. A woman who can powerfully hold space, which means be comfortable with silence,
and just be with him in his vulnerability creates that safety. And because he's being
vulnerable, he's open. And that's when the connection happens.
That's when he feels so deeply bonded because he, he can actually, I had a woman this for
me and she just waited. She just waited two, three minutes for my response and because
we do process these things slower as men, when we feel you holding that space, it bonds
us to you so deeply because we just feel so accepted and close to you in that space. Number
two is having him feel masculine. There is no.. it's huge, there is no greater high for
a man than being in his core energy and feeling alive and vitalized and energized by that
core masculine energy that that bubbles and flows within him and when he's in that energy
around you and when he gets to experience that high on a regular basis, that's, that's
an incredible feeling. That's a feeling that he gets to be in his, in his best state, around
you and on his purpose. And with that feeling, he's going to bond that feeling to you because
he gets to experience that around you and he's going to fall in love with you because
of the amazing feeling of being in your presence. Now you might be thinking, well, wait a minute,
Mark, isn't that his responsibility? Shouldn't he be the one feeling masculine? Oh, good
point. Matty, how do you do it? How do you help him to feel that as his woman?
And while it is his responsibility to actually evoke his own masculine energy, you can be
a major factor in helping him. And the women who are a major factor in helping their man
evoke their masculinity are the ones that those men fall in love with.
Number three is he can be your provider. So one thing that will absolutely bond a man
deeply to you is when he feels like he can, like I heard a great analogy, which is men
walk around being like, we do good, we do good. You know we're caveman. It's true. It's
absolutely true. We just get this again high out of being the provider out of knowing that
we're capable out of knowing that we're competent. So he wants to feel like this around you.
It's this hugely, um, what's the word for it's, it's hugely empowering feeling for a
man when he can feel like he can be that for you. And when he feels like that over and
over again day after day, month after month, he's going to bond deeply to you because he
feels so amazing in that and absolutely fall in love with you. How do you do this, Matty?
Now the antithesis of that feeling, the antithesis of feeling like a provider is feeling inadequate,
feeling inept, feeling like he actually can't do the job. So how do we evoke that feeling
of he feels like a good provider, he feels actually capable? It's really simple and my
wife is amazing at this. She has this down and makes me feel like a king every time she
does it. And it's simple appreciation - appreciation for a job well done. It's not appreciation
and then how he could do it better. It's not appreciation. And then a little criticism
on what he didn't do right. It's simple, pure appreciation for what you love that he did
for you. John Gottman actually has whole research around this on thriving relationships, and
he found that thriving relationships have a five to one ratio, five appreciations, or
five positive interactions for every one negative interaction. So as you're assessing your day,
as you're assessing your relationship, you're assessing your interaction with him. You're
going on and say, "Hm, how much have I appreciated him this day? Is there room to dial that up?
Could that actually be increased?" And of course he should be appreciating you as well.
But as you dial that up, you're going to actually invoke the love in him.
You're going to get that returned. And just think of it like, man food. Think of it like
if I have, I fed him five times today, if I've given him one criticism, think of it
like that, right? And he's doing the same back for you. And that's how you're creating
this empowering, loving relationship. Yeah. Number four is the acceptance is I, I cannot
tell you how important this is. Every single time I've been in love with a woman, I felt
deep and beautiful love with a woman, it's because I knew there was parts of myself that
maybe I came to the table and I wasn't fully proud of a fully owning, and she was so accepting
that once I told her those things, or once I shared those things, she just had this deep
acceptance. I'm just like, wow, I feel so loved right now. I feel so deeply accepted
because every part of me, she's, she's loving it. She's owning the whole of me. It's not
a superficial figure that she's falling in love with. It's not because I did one thing
great. It's the deepest stuff that she's truly come to accept in me, and that's the bond
I have with her that that no one else gets. That's that deep bond of love that just triggered
absolute love in me. How do you create this Matty? How do you make a man feel so accepted?
So if we feel really accepted, then what are we doing? We're actually putting down the
guard because every man we know we're not perfect. We know we've got flaws, we know
we don't measure up in certain areas and so if we feel like we're going to be criticized
or rejected for those, then most men put up this wall, they put up this shield, they put
up this looking-good program. So the way that you can actually help him withdraw that wall
and open up and become vulnerable is to feel the vibration of acceptance from you. And
that comes from you actually fully accepting yourself. If you can fully accept yourself,
then he subconsciously knows that you can actually accept him. And a quick story about
this, the moment I knew I loved my wife, the moment I was like, I am totally head over
heels in love with this woman. It was a moment you might not actually think would evoke love
in this moment. So she comes to visit me, we're just dating, comes to visit me, weekend
trip and we rent a cabin up in the woods and so we're going to share a bed for the first
time in this cabin. She tells me, she's like, "I'm not sleeping with you, just so you know."
And I was like, "Okay, okay. I know, and we're just going to, you know, play good in the
bed." As I wake up early in the morning and she's not in the bed. I'm like, "Where is,
where is Irene? And I come out into the hallway and she's sleeping on a futon in the hallway.
And I'm like, "Babe, what are you doing out here in the hallway?" Now this is early in
our, we've been dating maybe five, six months, but long distance, right? First trip out.
And she goes, uh, and so in this moment I ask her why she's out there. She has two responses.
She can either lie to me and give me the looking good response or she can actually be vulnerable
and can be the real response. But it would require that she fully accepted herself and
who she was. And so she decided to be vulnerable and give me the truth. And she goes, "Um,
this is really embarrassing to say, but I was really gassy last night and I didn't want
to subject you to that." And I apparently was laughing, I was like, "Oh my God, I love
this woman." Like she accepts herself so much that she can just own that right now. And
I know, guess what? I get gassy at times too. And I know that she's going to be able to
accept me in this moment. And it was a, it was a beautiful moment of illustrating self
acceptance. And when you do that for yourself, you will help your man feel even more love
and ignite that love in him for you.
I can only imagine how safe you must've felt vulnerable sharing, being vulnerable and sharing
with her. Yeah. Big time to that. Number five is be his believer. I, I cannot tell you,
we were talking last night about the importance of what is it that men really love from women?
What is it that men get from a woman get from a girlfriend that they just don't feel anywhere
else. And I can tell you as a man, when you have that supporter in your corner, when you
have that believer, when you have that woman who's just just thinks you can do it, knows
you're the man, believes in you. It we want to step into that. We want to step up and
it's the most amazing feeling to have this, this person behind us who's, who's got our
back. It's when you're doing this, what you're really communicating to a man is that "I believe
you are capable. I believe you can do that for me," and again, it makes him want to step
up and be the hero. You give him this feeling on a regular basis. How can he not help but
bond to you and fall in love with you?
Let me ask you a question right now. Look at Mark for just a moment. Look at this man
-confident, fit, handsome, hair like a Greek god. This guy, Amazing. Now let me just say,
the reason I bring this up is most men while on the exterior look like we've got it together,
we look like we're confident. We look like we know what we're doing. We look like we've
got the plan. In fact, that's how we're supposed to look. That's how we're built. The truth
of the matter is most of us are insecure about things. Most of us don't have it all figured
out. We might not be certain about how this is going to turn out. I think that's the plan.
I hope that's the plan, but, but I don't really know. And so there are amazing moments. How
can you be his believer? There are moments in your man's life that are like the pivotal
moments, these critical moments when he's got a big presentation to give or when he's
going to go after a new business or when he's going to create a video or when he's going
to do something that matters to him. And when you can look him in the eyes and say, "Babe,
you got this. Babe, I believe in you. Babe, you're going to rock this." You can give him
a big kiss before he leaves the door. He feels like a champion. I got tingles and there is
nothing.. Exactly! We get tingles when our woman looks us dead in the eye. We know she
believes in us even sometimes more than we believe in ourselves.
And that's the thing, when you, you, you feel like you should have it all together as a
man and freak, I have self doubt like presenting with this guy, phenomenal presenter, right?
One of my absolute this guy, if you haven't subscribed to his channel, do it. And being
here, but then having that person who says, "You got this, like you can do this, Mark."
I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, I got, I do got this." It's huge. It's so important. Number six is
live his purpose. One of the most energizing, vitalizing incredible feelings for a man is
that he feels like he's on his purpose. And you know how sexy is a guy? How, how attractive
do you find him when he's on that path, when you know he's passionate, when you know that
he's doing what he loves and lights him up? Good point. That vitality, you would fall
in love with that. Right? And for a man that is this incredible feeling that when he lives
that and he believes he can live that with you by his side and in his life, he will,
he will let go of any resistance and he'll just fall. He'll just fall for you and continue
that train forward all the way to the end. But if a man can't live his purpose or if
he feels like there is resistance there, if he feels like, "Oh, being with her is going
to counteract my purpose," that's when you'll get this resistance. Exactly, this hot and
cold pattern. And if he feels like he has to go off his purpose entirely, men get depressed
and men get anxious, you're not gonna have a partner that's, that's even capable of love.
Depression will literally reduce his ability to do that and he will feel better and better
about himself the more he's on that purpose. So Matty, how do you communicate with a man
that, that you'll be a great partner for him while he's on that train?
The key to, this is actually very, very simple, but not everything that's simple is easy.
And here's what I mean. Are you living your purpose? Because we've all seen people living
their purpose in greater ways. And what does it do to us? It inspires us. It actually gives
us permission. If they can do it, I can do it. Or if they are doing, I want to do it.
So my question for you is, what's been on your heart? What's been on your mind? What's
the calling that you have in your heart and mind right now that's calling you to a greater
level? It's calling you to the next chapter of your life. What's the book you want to
write or the business that you want to start or the place that you want to travel? And
are you brave enough to actually take that step? Because as you live your purpose, he's
going to see you and be like, "Dang, like she's doing it. That inspires me. I'm going
to live my purpose in a bigger way."
I love that. And it doesn't have to be this huge thing. A lot of people think I have to
have these massive plans or women think I have to be doing this amazing stuff. It could
be you just love quilting and you just, you go on your thing and you, you take that step
and he just walked past the room that you're quilting in and he just gets to look at you
while you're seeing there in your own space, on your purpose and just just go I'm, I'm
falling in love with that. I just, I love seeing her on her purpose and knowing that
she'll be with me on mine. So beautiful. So, so beautiful. Number seven is intense desire.
Now, we talk a lot on our channels about desire and you see a lot of coaches talk about ways
to make him chase you. We've done videos on it and you know it talks about important things
like building exciting life, having space, being willing to walk away, all these concepts
not being 100% available and some coaches will even teach gamey stuff on it that we
clearly do not agree with.
But the important thing if you want a guy to fall in love is that that chase, it has
to be over time, right? When a guy is working hard for you, when a guy is putting in the
effort over and over again, what that does is it builds up this prize value in his mind.
We as humans know that that which has value must take work and so when he's working for
you and chasing for you, chasing you for months, even years, that creates this huge sense of
value, this pride. It's like, I don't want to let go of this now I've, I've worked so
hard for this over such long period of time, but a lot of this advice is very short term,
right? And it works for a couple of months and then it's like, well, we're together now.
I've got the guy, how am I supposed to play games? How do I keep him chasing? Yeah, exactly.
None of that. None of that. But the key to keeping him chasing and building intense desire
was a topic that we really wanted to cover, but it was so important that we wanted to
film it. And another entire video on this that shows you what keeps the guy chasing
longterm, what builds that longterm desire without any games whatsoever. In fact, it
works on, yeah, because we talked about this today
And the question is always like, okay, so he's chasing me, but what happens after we
get each other? A couple months in, we're now committed or we're married then what actually
ignites that desire after that, what keeps that chasing energy? And here's the deal.
It's not what you think. No, that's probably not what you anticipate and nobody's talking
about this in any of the videos. So that's why we wanted to create a special video just
for you solely on this topic.
Make sure you check out that video on Matty's channel. It's, it's phenomenal and this is
something that, that people aren't talking about, coaches aren't talking about it is,
is getting someone chasing longterm, creating that desire without any silly games and without
any, any of that rubbish that gets to us and make sure you check out. It's on Matty's channel.
The link again is above and below where I am right now. So thanks so much for watching.
Leave your thoughts. Leave your comments, leave your questions, everything. We want
to hear them in the space below. What questions do you have? We manage? And one last question,
if you appreciate this guy, this guy is a rock star. What a beautiful man. Give him
some love in the comments section below, as well. Thanks much for watching. It was a pleasure
to present with him. We'll see you on his channel. Hit the like button and the subscribe
button. We'll see you very soon. Number three is he can be, sorry I wasn't, I wasn't looking
forward. Go ahead and take it again to actually, sorry. So you stepping into your feminine,
it helps him feel accepted. Number one, deep connection. You have to, I love this thing.
I go, Oh, I have that Boggs [inaudible].