-But you're having -- You're having another kid?
-I'm having another kid. You've got two now.
-I do have two. -I got my second on the way.
How would you describe the difference between one and two?
-Well, as you know, 'cause you're already a parent,
all these clichés you hear, they're painfully true.
-Yeah. -And the one that we had
been warned about, which proved to be true,
is it's not twice as hard with a second kid.
It's like 75 times harder. [ Laughter ]
-Yeah. -It's impossibly hard.
-Yeah.
-And we're not super young, you know?
I mean... -I think we are about the same.
-I think we're the same age -- very old.
-Yeah. Old for young kids.
-Very old for young kids.
I'm grateful that I have the patience I have
that I would've never had in my 20s.
-I agree with that. -But the bending over...
-Yeah. -...waking up early, and...
You know, all that caring for them, it's exhausting.
-It is exhausting.
And I imagine, when you have the second one,
the first one doesn't have an appreciation
for how much harder it got.
They're just still a kid. -They're a kid.
They could care less. Yeah, yeah.
-Your 2-year-old -- You just had an incident.
Is it safe to call it an incident?
-It is safe to call it. And I'm gonna --
A lot of people come on these shows,
and they brag about what great parents they are.
And I'm about to tell you something very dark, okay?
[ Laughter ]
First of all, let me just say our 4-year-old is perfect.
And we thought we were crushing it as parents.
-Right. -"Oh, my God.
We should write a book." [ Laughter ]
Now we have this 2-year-old. She's just an animal.
-Yeah. -Right?
I mean, truth be told, the first one's Kristen,
the second one's me.
So, the other night, she just would not stay in her bed.
Refused to do it. Not an option for her.
And we had friends coming over,
and so I'm like, "You got to get in bed."
Finally, by the 12th time, I lose it.
I lose my temper.
I pick her up, I take her into our bathroom.
Her favorite thing in the whole world
is "Paw Patrol" toys, right?
She's got a dozen of them or so.
They're her life.
I pick up all the "Paw Patrol" toys out of the tub,
and I throw them in the trash can in front of her,
and I hold up the trash can, and I say,
"If you get out of your bed one more time,
these are going out to the big trash can in the driveway."
[ Laughter ]
I swear to God, she goes, "You missed one, Daddy."
[ Laughter ]
And I, like -- I looked in the tub,
and I think Chase was still in the tub.
The police dog, Chase.
Stone-cold, Cool Hand Luke, and I'm like,
"Well, I'm out of options now.
This is the thing you care most about."
-Yeah. -It's not 1984.
I can't hit her. -Yeah.
[ Laughter ] -Nothing I can do!
-Yeah, she called your bluff. -Yes!
-I called my mom the next day, I said, "This is what happened.
What should I do?"
She said, "That's exactly what you did."
And I said, "Well, what did you do?"
And she goes, "I gave up." [ Laughter ]
At 3 years old, I'm like, "You win.
Do whatever you want."
She goes, "Well, look, you have health insurance and a career.
They'll be fine." -Well, there you go.
-Fingers crossed.
-There's something else before you go I want to ask about.
My wife and I -- I would say
we're a huge fans of "Game of Thrones."
But I saw this thing I'm about to show,
and I realized your fandom with Kristen dwarfs ours.
-Let's just say, if I were a cast member
of "Game of Thrones,"
I would be in fear of Kristen and I.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
That we might sneak into your house and sleep in your bed.
-Yeah. Because you -- No one asked you to do this.
HBO did not reach out.
-No. In fact -- Yeah, yeah.
-You used your own money and your own time.
-We did. -You're very busy.
-Yes, we have the two kids. -And you shot this.
-Yeah, well, let's take a look.
♪♪♪♪
[ Laughter ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Laughter ]
♪♪♪♪
-Just fantastic! [ Cheers and applause ]
I'll never...
-We could've made something profitable.
-Yeah, but you just -- you just threw --
-We rented those instruments.
We had to come up with all those costumes.
It was this funny idea that turned into just weeks of work.
[ Laughter ]
And then when we were done, we watched it,
and we're like, "It's great! Why did we do this?"
[ Laughter ]
-Well, I'm glad that we got a chance to show it here.
-It feels great to be recognized.
Thank you so much.
-Thank you so much for being here.
Always a pleasure to see you.