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(gentle piano music)
♪ When I was young with the world at my feet ♪
♪ My future looked sweet and bright ♪
♪ I chose the wrong path which I've lived to regret ♪
♪ How can I set it right ♪
♪ What more could be waiting for me ♪
♪ Besides this small-time crime spree ♪
♪ Do I start a new life ♪
♪ Get a new gig ♪
♪ It's time to dream big ♪
♪ Picture me sensibly dressed ♪
♪ A perfect employee ♪
♪ Selling used cars with a zest ♪
♪ The people enjoy me ♪
♪ Quick, plant your buns ♪
♪ I swear it runs ♪
♪ We don't believe in refunds ♪
♪ Come see the weasel ♪
♪ 'Cause these'll go fast ♪
♪ I'll make it big time ♪
♪ From small time to big time ♪
♪ Big time, whoa-oh-ho ♪
♪ Oh, what a feeling, wheeling and dealing ♪
♪ Making it, making it big time ♪
♪ Now you're thinking through it ♪
♪ Hey, you can do it, hoo hoo ♪
♪ Go on and pursue it ♪
♪ Laws were not always my friend ♪
♪ That was my journey ♪
♪ Could I protect and defend ♪
♪ As an attorney ♪
♪ Or as a surgeon with an urgent need to donate organs ♪
♪ Then I'd self-publish my uplifting tale ♪
♪ How I went big time ♪
♪ From small time to big time ♪
♪ 1-800-POP-GOES ♪
♪ Big time, whoa-oh-ho ♪
♪ Call the weasel, call the weasel ♪
♪ Then you can all meet the Weasel of Wall Street ♪
♪ Making it, making it big time ♪
♪ Follow the guru, now he's a guru ♪
♪ Follow the guru ♪
♪ Ah ♪
♪ I'll teach you the power of now ♪
♪ If you buy a subscription ♪
♪ I could do a weasely dig, become a big tycoon ♪
♪ Then maybe I'll shoot for the stars ♪
♪ And end up on the moon ♪
♪ Here at the top looking down ♪
♪ I'm like a titan ♪
♪ Hand me a cape and a crown ♪
♪ Gimme a trident ♪
♪ Loving my sleazy, old weasely life ♪
♪ Oh, money, you complete me ♪
(tense melodic music)
- Your dreamings are arranged.
- You hurt my kidney.
- This was a terrible guy!
- I lost my light stick.
- Argh! - I just plain don't like you.
(gentle piano music)
♪ When I was young with the world at my feet ♪
♪ My future looked sweet and bright ♪
♪ Now I've gotta try to rectify ♪
♪ And choose to be a good guy ♪
♪ I'll straighten up ♪
♪ And try not to stray ♪
♪ Starting today ♪
♪ And I'll be big time ♪
♪ From small time to big time ♪
♪ Gonna be a better weasel ♪
♪ Big time, whoa-oh-ho ♪
♪ Big time ♪
♪ I'm sticking to it, know I can do it ♪
♪ Making it, making it big ♪
(tires screeching) - Ooh!
- Hey, you, help!
(light tinkling music)
(dramatic orchestral music)
♪ Big time ♪
♪ Sorry, goat lady. I'm sure you'll be fine ♪
- [Goat] I'm okay.