Politeness is the practical application of good manners or etiquette. It is a
culturally defined phenomenon, and therefore what is considered polite in
one culture can sometimes be quite rude or simply eccentric in another cultural
context. While the goal of politeness is to make
all of the parties relaxed and comfortable with one another, these
culturally defined standards at times may be manipulated to inflict shame on a
designated party. Anthropologists Penelope Brown and
Stephen Levinson identified two kinds of politeness, deriving from Erving
Goffman's concept of face: Negative politeness: Making a request
less infringing, such as "If you don't mind..." or "If it isn't too much
trouble..."; respects a person's right to act freely. In other words,
deference. There is a greater use of indirect speech acts.
Positive politeness: Seeks to establish a positive relationship between parties;
respects a person's need to be liked and understood. Direct speech acts, swearing
and flouting Grice's maxims can be considered aspects of positive
politeness because: they show an awareness that the
relationship is strong enough to cope with what would normally be considered
impolite; they articulate an awareness of the
other person's values, which fulfills the person's desire to be accepted.
Some cultures seem to prefer one of these kinds of politeness over the
other. In this way politeness is culturally bound.
History During the Enlightenment era, a
self-conscious process of the imposition of polite norms and behaviours became a
symbol of being a genteel member of the upper class. Upwardly mobile middle
class bourgeoisie increasingly tried to identify themselves with the elite
through their adopted artistic preferences and their standards of
behaviour. They became preoccupied with precise rules of etiquette, such as when
to show emotion, the art of elegant dress and graceful conversation and how
to act courteously, especially with women. Influential in this new discourse
was a series of essays on the nature of politeness in a commercial society,
penned by the philosopher Lord Shaftesbury in the early 18th century.
Shaftesbury defined politeness as the art of being pleasing in company:
'Politeness' may be defined a dext'rous management of our words and actions,
whereby we make other people have better opinion of us and themselves.
Periodicals, such as The Spectator, founded as a daily publication by Joseph
Addison and Richard Steele in 1711, gave regular advice to its readers on how to
be a polite gentleman. It's stated goal was "to enliven morality with wit, and
to temper wit with morality...to bring philosophy out of the closets and
libraries, schools and colleges, to dwell in clubs and assemblies, at
tea-tables and coffeehouses" It provided its readers with educated, topical
talking points, and advice in how to carry on conversations and social
interactions in a polite manner. The art of polite conversation and
debate was particularly cultivated in the coffeehouses of the period.
Conversation was supposed to conform to a particular manner, with the language
of polite and civil conversation considered to be essential to the
conduct of coffeehouse debate and conversation. The concept of 'civility'
referred to a desired social interaction which valued sober and reasoned debate
on matters of interest. Established rules and procedures for proper
behaviour as well as conventions, were outlined by gentleman's clubs, such as
Harrington's Rota Club. Periodicals, including The Tatler and The Spectator,
infused politeness into English coffeehouse conversation, as their
explicit purpose lay in the reformation of English manners and morals.
Techniques to show politeness Expressing uncertainty and ambiguity
through hedging and indirectness. Polite lying
Use of euphemisms Preferring tag questions to direct
statements, such as "You were at the store, weren't you?"
modal tags request information of which the speaker is uncertain. "You didn't go
to the store yet, did you?" affective tags indicate concern for the
listener. "You haven't been here long, have you?"
softeners reduce the force of what would be a brusque demand. "Hand me that
thing, could you?" facilitative tags invite the addressee
to comment on the request being made. "You can do that, can't you?"
Some studies have shown that women are more likely to use politeness formulas
than men, though the exact differences are not clear. Most current research has
shown that gender differences in politeness use are complex, since there
is a clear association between politeness norms and the stereotypical
speech of middle class white women, at least in the UK and US. It is therefore
unsurprising that women tend to be associated with politeness more and
their linguistic behaviour judged in relation to these politeness norms.
Linguistic devices Besides and additionally to the above,
many languages have specific means to show politeness, deference, respect, or
a recognition of the social status of the speaker and the hearer. There are
two main ways in which a given language shows politeness: in its lexicon, and in
its morphology. The T-V distinction is a common example in Western languages.
Criticism of the theory Brown and Levinson's theory of
politeness has been criticised as not being universally valid, by linguists
working with East-Asian languages, including Japanese. Matsumoto and Ide
claim that Brown and Levinson assume the speaker's volitional use of language,
which allows the speaker's creative use of face-maintaining strategies toward
the addressee. In East-Asian cultures like Japan, politeness is achieved not
so much on the basis of volition as on discernment, or prescribed social norms.
Wakimae is oriented towards the need for acknowledgment of the positions or roles
of all the participants as well as adherence to formality norms appropriate
to the particular situation. Japanese is perhaps the most widely
known example of a language that encodes politeness at its very core. Japanese
has two main levels of politeness, one for intimate acquaintances, family and
friends, and one for other groups, and verb morphology reflects these levels.
Besides that, some verbs have special hyper-polite suppletive forms. This
happens also with some nouns and interrogative pronouns. Japanese also
employs different personal pronouns for each person according to gender, age,
rank, degree of acquaintance, and other cultural factors. See Honorific speech
in Japanese, for further information. See also
Formality Intercultural competence
Polite fiction Politeness maxims
Politeness theory Social graces
References Further reading
Brown, P. and Levinson, S. Politeness: Some Universals in Language Usage.
Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Holmes, J. 1995 Women Men and Politeness
London: Longman Mills, S. Gender and Politeness,
Cambridge: Cambridge University Press Watts, R.J. Politeness. Cambridge:
Cambridge University Press. Spencer-Oatey, H. Culturally Speaking,
Continuum. Kadar, D. and M. Haugh "Understanding
Politeness". Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
External links Model Citizenship Real-life Examples of
Civil Politeness Sociolinguistics: Politeness
Sociolinguistics: Politeness in Spanish wiki project in comparative politeness:
European Communicative Strategies