Do you care too much about other people’s opinions?
I am Marat from EMMOTION and in this video we will go through the signs which indicate
that you care too much about what others think.
As human beings we are raised hearing things like “What would the neighbours say?”,
“What will they think at school?”, “They will laugh at you if you do this”, etc.
We are constantly being programmed to what is considered “normal” by the society.
Being perceived as “different” can be very complicated even today.
The kids are a clear evidence of this: school kids single out other schoolchildren based
on unique features, resulting in bullying and torment for the child perceived as “different”.
Even as adults we can experience acts of hate or violence from complete strangers simply
for our gender, race or sexual orientation.
Starting from an early age we are being programed to “fit in” as a survival mechanism, which
later translates into reasons why we care so much about what others think of us!
An excessive worrying about other people’s opinions is unhealthy!
It also leads to constantly adjusting our actions which can have a huge negative effect
on our lives.
Here are the key signs that you care too much about what others might think:
1.
You are constantly evaluating yourself through other people’s eyes.
Have you been busy trying to think and find out what other people say about you?
If the answer is a “yes”, then this is a clear sign that you are quite stuck on what
other people think.
2.
You are crushed by negative feedback.
Even though you often seek it out and you intellectually know that the feedback helps
you grow.
You still take feedback and comments personally, as proof that you are not good enough.
You only feel accomplished when someone praises you.
3.
You want to say the right thing at the right time.
You self-censor a lot, you are afraid you might say something that might turn others
off.
And so to be on the safe side, many times you don’t speak up, you don’t share your
ideas or your opinions.
Some censoring can be good and even necessary at times, but not when it means misrepresenting
our opinions and who we are.
4.
You try to make everyone like you.
You go out of your way to be interested in the same things that others are, to like things
they like.
You make good conversation about things that light them up without sharing what lights
you up.
You want everyone to like you, and you make an effort for it.
5.
You tune down what you know, because others might think you’re a know-it-all.
You believe that not showing what you’re capable of and things you know, will make
others feel more comfortable.
You don’t like coming across as an expert and you choose being modest about your knowledge.
6.
You have a hard time asking for help.
Asking for help is often seen as a sign of weakness from people who aren’t secure in
their strengths.
In fact asking for help is ¡¡the opposite of weak, because you clearly don’t mind
being considered one.
7.
You have a hard time saying “no”, because they might get mad or be disappointed in you.
There is a time for “yes” and a time for “no”, and there are people who are afraid
of both.
However, the fear of what will happen if they say “no” is greater, so they end up saying
“yes” more than they should.
8.
You don’t pursue your dreams.
You find yourself trapped in a life that sounded promising, but that doesn’t fulfill you.
You are afraid to make a change, because they might judge you and you’d make a fool out
of yourself.
You fear that you might be considered stupid for making “irrational” decisions, you
are afraid of failing while making the change.
9.
You brag a lot about your achievements Tending to exaggerate your accomplishments
is an explicit sign of being fearful of what others think of you.
When you want to talk a lot about yourself and want everyone else to listen to you that’s
is hardly a good virtue.
A constant need to show off, to tell stories sometimes blown out of proportion, is an indication
that you want to make an impression on others.
An obvious sign of a low self-esteem.
10.
Approval Addiction.
Yes, seeking constant approval is an addiction.
Once they stop saying “how good you look” or “how well this t-shirt looks on you”
you start feeling insecure and self-conscious.
Sometimes if as kids we didn’t get much needed validation from our parents and teachers,
we will seek out that approval in unhealthy ways in our adulthood.
You know there is this famous quote which I really like, and I think we should all keep
it in mind.
“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there is still going to be
someone who hates peaches”.
Now matter how hard we try to fit in and to be liked, there will still be haters.
“What others think of you is none of your business” and as a theory it sounds great.
Let’s try and put this in practice in my next video :)
Thanks for watching, for more professional and personal growth habits subscriber to my
channel.